My relationship just ended
So I'm new to the forum so please bear with me. Today my relationship ended, weren't together for a very long time(going into 6 months). The thing is we meet at work 2 years ago, he liked me but I was emotionally not ready to date. So we kinda stayed distant co work/friends. Last year I found myself feeling like I could date and try to trust someone. And I found myself being attracted to him, so I begin talking to him and it stayed us talking for like a month to a month and a half. We finally planned our first and from there it was good. Unfortunately he started school and was working at the same time, so we worked around that we'd have dinner or watch movies at his place. I meet his family and he meet what family he hadn't already known aka my mom. We were good even though he was stressed about life and school, I tried to be an ear and someone he could at least lean on emotionally. The holidays came and went, January passed and now we're in to the month of 'love'. But unfortunately he crashed his car and totalled it. With alot of back story that isn't my place to put out there, he is kinda at the losing end. He's stressed about bills, about school and can see he's depressed and just exhausted. Valentine comes and he still have me a wonderful gift and card. After that he starts to distance himself, he starts to respond on one word responses or just not responding at all. I find myself feeling sad and really hoping he's not gonna break up with me. He's done that before when he gets stressed he kinda just starts to shut down, so I convinced myself for a little bit that it was ok. But unfortunately I was wrong and right. Right cause my feeling he was gonna break up with me was right and wrong cause it wasn't ok. I know it wasn't as long alot of others relationships on here, but I still found myself bonding with him and really wanting to build a future with him. Through the good and the bad, I wanted to be there even at his lowest of lows and the highest of high. Shoot even through the boring parts. But I was wrong, he needs to help himself and fix himself before he can even try. And I'm gonna be honest he's a great guy, who's hard working and I can't be mad or upset with or at him cause he's already got to much on his plate. I'll miss him and what we had but I'm letting go.
@Helpmeout1221
Heyyy, *sits besides you and lends a hand out *
How do you feel after letting it all out? ♥️
I am so very sorry you experienced a breakup, sometimes circumstances are such that lead to hard decisions we might not be feeling so good about ,but after a while , it turns out to be a great decision, on reflecting back.
So very sweet to hear you were ready to support him and be with him during all highs and lows , but maybe like you mentioned he does actually need to work on himself , get back on again and figure stuff out and who knows what the future holds In store for y'all, right? ♥️
Letting go can be so difficult, specially letting go of someone with whom we've imagined our future, take all your time to accept, to break and to heal , allow your emotions to flow at their pace, absolutely no rush ....just one step at a time.
So glad you're here on cups, seeking support, super brave of you to speak about heartbreak and loss .... A hearty welcome to the forums, this is a safe place for you ♥️
Sending lots of love and hugs ! 🤗♥️
You’re not alone, I am also going through a breakup. My best friend who I was lucky to be close with and date for the last 6 months. He also just started school as we met, and whenever the stress came I’d try to be supportive and he would pull away. It leaves you feeling like something is wrong with you. I’m beginning to realize that when someone feels chaos it’s hard to see comfort. The chaos is their norm. So now he’s pushed me out of his life and “wants to work on himself” but is also having some pretty destructive behaviours and it’s only been 2 days. I’m proud of you for letting go, I’m not there yet... still hoping someday we will figure it out. That’s a huge amazing step you’re doing for yourself and I hope I can get there soon too! Just remember you put the time into working on you, and sometimes it highlights the broken in others. It’s not something we do, just something they can’t help but see... and if they aren’t ready to get better it just makes them feel unworthy. Don’t for a second think this is your fault or that you are not the one coming out on top. Don’t diminish how hard you’ve worked. I wish you didn’t feel that pain and anxiety over wondering if you were going to get broken up with. That’s not a fair way to be treated. Take care.
