Wife and I just separated
My wife and I got married last July after dating for 8+ years. She told me last week that a few weeks after our wedding she started having a physical affair with one of her classmates.
I told her I was willing to make it work if she completely cut ties with the guy so we could focus on ourselves going forward and she agreed. Then I saw her texting the guy again and told her that if she wasn’t ready to work on our relationship, she needed to move out of our house.
Now I’m alone in an empty house and the reality of us not working out is setting in. Looking at things objectively, it makes sense in my head to sever all ties and try to move on but I can’t bring my heart to feel the same.
I’m so sorry this has happened to you. It was smart of you to stand up for yourself and place boundaries, had you considered couples counseling at all as a possibility if you still wanted to continue the relationship? Not that you should feel that you should. Just, as someone who is grieving a long relationship that has ended, I know it hurts a lot and the idea of going out on your own can be scary.
Has she expressed any kind of regret or remorse for her actions? :( Her moving out over severing ties with this guy seems like a pretty definitive statement of where she stands but maybe she does have some regret or intention to change.
Being alone will heal you
Build you emotionally and mentally
@uncertaingrain- so sorry to hear about your situation. Having a spouse be unfaithful is so painful. You are brave to set boundaries and stipulation requiring her to either sever relations (all including texting). Being alone in the house can give you time to contemplate the rest of your life.
However it sounds suspicious that this affair may take a while to run its course. Often affairs do not last and the unfaithful partner comes slinking back home.
Be prepared for that possibility and how you might respond to it.
In the meantime, take the best care of yourself at this time in your life.
