Chronic Illnesses and Relationships

Hey everyone! This is a topic that is so important to me as it affects my relationships daily. My significant other and I both suffer from different chronic illnesses – both long-term and newly diagnosed. Over the past few years, weve learned a lot and continue to improve on how to help each other.

One of the key factors in dealing with the pressure of chronic illness is by maintaining healthy relationships – our support system is what helps us through the day – friends, family and significant others.

Im sure most of us can relate to those days where its hard to get out of bed. Theres no energy or motivation for it. It can be even tougher when both sides struggle with chronic illness. Sometimes you can be lucky and have a better day than your partner and be supportive for them. Unfortunately, that isnt always how life works. There will be days when you both arent feeling well and its hard to support another when you feel you cant support yourself.

Here are some of my thoughts on how to help loved ones and yourself when dealing with chronic illness:

~~Communication!

I know, I know. We hear it all the time but communication really is the key especially when dealing with health matters. Talk about how youre feeling and what youre going through. Whether it is your partner or yourself dealing with chronic illness, we are only human and cant read minds. Make sure to use I language - telling each other how you feel rather than accusing the other. If you feel that you arent or cant be supportive enough – convey those feelings. Ask how you can help each other and reach out to them if you feel something is missing.

Its great to talk to your partner but you should also try to find time where you and your partner refrain from talking about health for a short while. Focus on positive thoughts for some time and be in the moment with them.

~~Empathy

Imagine yourself in their shoes. How would it feel if the roles were reversed? When they want to talk about their health – listen. Show that you care. Do some research if you can! Learn how you can help each other especially in emergencies. If they wish to make changes in their diet or lifestyle, be supportive and embrace change – join in on the healthy changes if you can!

~~Allow space when needed

Try to comfort them if they are having a rough day. At the same time, if they want some space, let them have it. Be there – even if that means silently holding them. If you are making plans and your partner isnt feeling up for it, dont guilt them over it. If possible, come up with alternate ideas/plans to adjust to depending how you feel. For example ordering in instead of a night planned out when you dont have the energy to leave the house.

Whether it is yourself or your loved one, do some research!

~~Believe in each other

Struggling with chronic illness is a continuous learning process – it's okay to now know all the answers. There will be bumps in the road but the process is to give yourself time and when you can dust yourself off and keep moving. Of course it will be rough and you wont always be able to be positive but you can continue moving forward and motivate them and yourself.

Secrets of people who are in a relationship and chronically ill

Keep in mind that health can often make or break a relationship and really does test in sickness and in health. Not all relationships will make it through. Thats okay. Know that you arent alone. Chronic illnesses affect so many people and we can be there for each other

What are your thoughts on chronic illnesses in relationships? How do you feel they affect you?

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