What would the best version of yourself be like?

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What would the best version of yourself be like?

I would be way more focus, more positive, and more confident in myself. ( I am really working on all three)

I will balance my time better and be less lazy. I will handle my pain and mistakes better and use them as learning things.

I feel honestly I am so far from my best self. *sighs*

@AveryLove

The best version of myself would be energetic, confident, happy, beautiful, independent and able to live alone. I would be kind and helpful and treat others with respect. I won't be bipolar or unnecessarily aggressive but that doesn't mean I will be sunshine and rainbows either, it's not my personality. I pray this happens in real life.

@AveryLove

I see it as a bit of a paradox. My best version of myself in treating others is to think about WHY someone is saying or doing something, rather than focusing exclusively on what they do/say (especially if this is hurtful). My best version of how I treat myself is to forgive myself for when my behavior is hurtful based on my underlying feelings.

A specific example of this is that my ex tends to make false assumptions based on his feelings and deliver them as accusations "you did this to hurt me." I often react based not only on the fact that the assumption is untrue, but also to the intent to hurt. When I can put my hurt aside and realize that he must really be hurting to feel this way, I respond better and prevent an escalation/argument. At the same time, I need to forgive myself for sometimes getting sucked in.

@AveryLove

Thanks so much for hosting this discussion... What a great question...

It's such a funny balance...

There is this saying... we are not human doings... but human beings...

but at the same time, if we want to know who someone is, we need to see what they do... not what they say they are or who they think they are....

In terms of goals, I do work to be positive, upbeat, more centered and less triggered, more action less reaction, emotionally present, emotionally sober... I've spent a long time in the past (and still on bad days which are less and less now), hating who I was and really just couldn't wait to be someone else... I just felt so unworthy... and unloveable

But today, I would say my best version of myself is who I am today... With all my flaws, insecurities, inbalances and mistakes. For most of my life, I have aspired to be better, smarter, prettier, thinner, more successful, more efficient, more helpful, create more impact...be a better human, more wise, more compassionate, better listener, better friend....better wife, better mom...

Now, my best version is who I am each and every day, because I do my best with my higher power's help best I can everyday.

I definitely agree with AveryLove and recommend seeking professional help! It's helped me so much from feeling hopelessness, despair, feeling like a blind mole in the sewer.... Things that helped me were therapy, and if its not affordable, I attended twelve step groups. There are also 12 step free online phone calls and meetings and skype. I also recommend exercising (that really helped my mind) like yoga and qigong and neigong and taichi are good for mind and body, but any exercise like walking and getting out really help. If money is an issue, there are places that have pro-bono counseling, and also group therapy is cheaper. Twelve steps, celebrate recovery is usually a buck or two, or if you don't have anything, it is truly free. I also found helpful for me going to the right church or religious group (one which fit me... I had to really look hard for one open and accepting of differences and questions and disagreements)....

As they say in 12 steps... just coming every week or every day and investing in myself, made a huge difference. Just trying everything I could to help me... ultimately gave me the message that I was worth it! It took me over two decades of therapy... but every step was worth it :)... And with hindsight... I was my best version of me... in the moment...even when I felt hopeless, hated, despicable, unforgiveable and unloveable.

Sending love and hugs to all who shared! In CODA we have a saying, "We will believe in you, until you can believe in yourself. We are each precious, unrepeatable and so worth it! :)

A whole nother person. not even remotelylike me.

With freedom...

@AveryLove

What would the best version of yourself be like? I would be wealthy and have the means to travel. I'dbe healthy and in a wonderful supportive relationship

How would you act? How would you treat others? How would you treat yourself?

I would give money to needy causes. I would treat people no differently than I do now. I would get plastic surgery and travel and spa as often as I wish

There're a lot to say. The best version of myself is someone who is not free of anxiety disorder, depression, and childhood trauma but someone who can effectively manage these issues. A good ability to keep mental healh problems under control is critical to every aspect of my life. Personal productivity will be on another level and so is problem resolving skill. A better mental health also allows me to take better care of my significant other who has bipolar

@AveryLove

academic, quiet, less lonely, content with myself, focused, athletic, good at conversation, friends with george harrison, ringo starr, brian may, roger taylor, john deacon