Divorce

@Ashjan2023

Sending lots of support and strength your way, if you're going through a divorce. It's an incredibly tough situation to deal with.

Understandable how the trust feels shattered, and reasonably so. I don't feel there's a concrete time frame for healing which involves being able to trust people again, and everyone is allowed to be at their own pace, so please be assured, you're allowed to take all the time you need to process all you're feeling, and moving at your pace through everything. Little steps definitely count though and it's encouraged to take it one at a time.

Its brave of you to reach out in 7 cups for support and I hope you find lots of compassion here as you navigate through this difficult phase in life. 💛 Sending good wishes.

You mention the loss of trust which indicates that it was broken in the divorce at some point. The answer is it's different for everyone, but it often accelerates the healing process if you're able to have a heart-to-heart with your partner about it to gain closure. If that's not possible due to a lack of maturity on their end, it's going to take you time to process everything. Even if you can talk to them about it, it's going to take time. Healing isn't something that happens overnight but comes in waves. It's important to be patient with yourself during the healing process and not berate yourself for not being healed fast enough.

The good news though is that by working on yourself and having new experiences, one day the pain won't feel as potent. Plus maybe you now know what red flags to look out for in the future after having gone through your trust being broken. It's not everything, but the wisdom in that can certainly help.

@Ashjan2023

Hey friend... I was divorced 3 years ago.  She got married again after about 6 months.  For me, I had to get prescribed Xanax for the first month and an SSRI for these three years in an attempt to keep my emotions dull.  I recently weaned myself off the SSRI and realize I'm still sad.  It's not as much about her now, but more of how lonely I am and knowing that at my age, I'll never have a meaningful and trusting relationship again.  So, it can be different for different people and circumstances.  You may be able to overcome it.  Unfortunately though, for some of us, the lack of trust and loneliness is permanent.  I wish you the best.

@Ashjan2023 I'm sorry you've experienced this, it can be a really complex situation and quite disheartening too. I wouldn't say there is a set time because it varies from individual to circumstances. Healing, moving on and heading towards the next stage in your life can look different for everyone. As you process your emotions and take one step at a time, you'll learn more about yourself and find someone when the time is right. I hope for the best for you

@Ashjan2023

Healing takes us some time. Maybe small progressive steps towards rebuilding your life can help. :)

@Ashjan2023 Hello! Feel sorry for what you're going through. 
Firstly, I want to congratulate you for the courage to post on this forum and ask for support. It is a big step and denotes courage to strengthen your current state. 
Breakups are extremely painful and the healing process differs from person to person. It could last days, weeks, months, years. What is important is take into consideration any sort of help when you feel like talking to someone: 7Cups, friends, family, therapy. Anything is helpful, there is no shame to express your feelings, at some point everyone has been through this kind of situation.
Take care of yourself and try to keep yourself focused on your goals, objectives and activities that bring you joy. It is inevitable to not think during this healing process about the divorce - but we need to understand how we manage those type of situations. Only time can heal.
I am sure everything will go well for you, and if you feel like talking to someone. I am here for you anytime!

@Ashjan2023

That's such an honest question which shows how much pain do you really feel, and it's valid to feel like frustrated.

I think the truth is there's no fixed timeline for that. For some people it's monthes, for others it's years.

What really matters more than the (how long) is giving youselfe permssion to heal, at your own pace, without rushing it

Because you feel like you "should" be over it by now, but you should take your time without rushing

You need to have small steps trusting yourself first, before trusting new partner

What does trust look for you right now? Is it more about trusting other people or trusting yourself again?