idk what to do ):

@Moonlight52

I'm sorry that your parents are hurting you 🥺

And you are struggling with your faith!

It's important in the hardest if times, to cling onto your faith, even harder 💖

@Moonlight52

hey i'm so sorry to hear ur going through this..

ur not alone i'm a muslim struggling with my faith too and i have religious trauma from how my parents weaponized islam against me.

i know in islam it says to be good to our parents but u also need to be able to protect ur peace. distancing urself away from people that harm u (even if it's ur parents) doesn't make u less of a muslim. Allah is all merciful and will always understand whatever hardships u are going through ❤️

give it another chance. pray tahajjud and ask Allah for whatever u want. and who knows, maybe the answers will be right there in front of u 💕

Assalamu alaikum warahmatullahi wabrakaatahu @Moonlight52 ✨🌸

First take a breath. What you wrote doesn’t sound like someone who lost faith.

It sounds like someone who is overwhelmed, wounded, exhausted, and still trying.

That matters.

1. Feeling distant from Allah does NOT mean Allah is distant from you

Allah already addressed this feeling in the Qur’an:

“And when My servants ask you about Me, indeed I am near.”

(Qur’an 2:186)

Notice, He didn’t say “when they pray perfectly” or “when they are consistent.”

He said when they ask. Even confusion counts as asking.

Distance in faith is often not rebellion—it’s burnout.

2. Hardship lasting “too long” doesn’t mean you failed the test

Many people think a test must be short or obvious. That’s not how life works.

“Do people think they will be left to say, ‘We believe,’ and they will not be tested?”

(Qur’an 29:2)

Some tests come in waves, not one strike.

Some tests don’t break you—they wear you down slowly. Allah knows that.

And this verse is important:

“Allah does not burden a soul beyond what it can bear.”

(Qur’an 2:286)

This does not mean it will feel easy.

It means: You are not weak for struggling—your strength is already being used.

3. Worship feeling “too heavy” is a human response, not a sin

Even the companions felt this.

The Prophet ﷺ said:

> “Faith increases and decreases.”

(Ahmad)

So when faith decreases, the solution is not guilt, it’s gentleness.

Right now, if:

Reading Qur’an feels heavy

Prayer feels overwhelming

Listening feels exhausting

That does not mean stop completely. It means change the approach.

Practical alternatives (these count):

Listen to Qur’an quietly while lying down

Read one single ayah, not a page

Say “Ya Allah”

Sit in silence and admit: “I’m tired.”

The Prophet ﷺ said:

“The most beloved deeds to Allah are those done consistently, even if small.”

(Bukhari & Muslim)

Small is not worthless. Small is beloved.

4. Duʿāʾ still counts even when it’s messy, angry, or confused

There is a dangerous lie people believe:

“I need to be mentally okay before I talk to Allah.”

False.

Allah invites you as you are.

“Call upon Me; I will respond to you.”

(Qur’an 40:60)

You don’t need Arabic. You don’t need hope. You don’t need calmness.

Tears. Silence. Complaints. All are accepted.

Even “I don’t know what I’m doing anymore” is a duʿāʾ.

5. “After hardship comes ease” does not mean instant relief

Allah repeats this twice:

“Indeed, with hardship comes ease.”

(Qur’an 94:5–6)

Ulama explain:

One hardship can come with multiple eases—but they may appear gradually, not all at once.

Ease can look like:

One peaceful night after many restless ones

One person who understands

One moment of calm

Strength to survive another day

Ease is not always an event. Sometimes it’s endurance.

6. About parents: Islam does NOT demand silent suffering,

This is very important.

Yes, kindness to parents is huge in Islam:

“Be good to your parents.”

(Qur’an 17:23)

But Islam NEVER commands you to accept emotional or psychological harm.

Being respectful ≠ letting yourself be destroyed.

You can:

Be polite and protect boundaries

Limit conversations without being rude

Choose silence instead of arguments

The Prophet ﷺ never taught self-destruction in the name of patience.

“There should be neither harming nor reciprocating harm.”

(Ibn Majah)

Your pain matters.

7. You are not failing faith—you are surviving a storm.

Look at this verse carefully:

“Allah is Gentle with His servants.”

(Qur’an 42:19)

Gentleness means:

He understands burnout

He sees invisible struggles

He counts effort, not results

If you are still thinking about Allah, missing closeness, wanting to reconnect—

that itself is iman.

8. What may help right now (very practical)

Mentally & spiritually:

Stop demanding “full return” to faith. Aim for 1%.

journal or note what hurts—Allah sees written pain too.

Make duʿāʾ asking for strength, not answers.

Emotionally:

Please talk to someone safe (friend, counselor, trusted person).

Faith struggles are heavier when carried alone.

Spiritually simple routine (minimum):

One short duʿāʾ daily

One ayah or hadith

One moment of honesty with Allah

That’s enough for now.

Final reminder

Allah says:

> “Do not despair of the mercy of Allah.”

(Qur’an 39:53)

Despair is not sadness.

Despair is believing Allah has given up on you.

He hasn’t.

You are not broken.

You are not weak.

You are tired—and still standing.

May Allah ease your heart gently, restore your connection slowly, and reward every quiet effort you make 🤍

You're not alone, I'm here for you. i really know how it feels, I've been in there too. i feel you. you can reach out to me whenever you need. Ask me if you have any questions.

Read this again and again. you might get help.

From today, you'll be on my tahajjud dua. so, no worries. I'm here for you. don't lose hope.

Sending my love and prayers to you. 🌸💞

Hugs*🤗 💞

@Moonlight52 ,  My dear friend, I read your message with a sincere heart. Please know that what you are going through is very human and very real. Faith is not always enthusiasm or strength; sometimes faith is patience, and sometimes it is simply not giving up.

There is a beautiful saying: “Set things right between you and Allah, and Allah will set everything right.” But this does not mean doing everything perfectly all at once. Sometimes turning to Allah means nothing more than carrying the desire to turn back to Him in your heart. And you already have that desire — and that itself is precious.

This is why reading is so important. Reading is not just about gaining information; it is about reviving the heart. When we stop reading, the storms of life feel heavier and larger. But when we read the right books, we begin to understand ourselves and the meaning behind what we are going through. Our elders say that those who hold firmly to the Qur’an find their lives rebuilt, and those who read works that explain its truths find their hearts strengthened, their hope renewed, and their future illuminated. Through reading, faith grows, and one no longer feels alone.

Do not forget this either: prayer and worship are not only for the moments when we feel strong; they are a refuge for the moments when we feel most tired and broken. It is completely normal for them to feel heavy at first. But with even small consistency, that heaviness slowly turns into a deep peace. One day, you may realize that standing before Allah has become the most comforting moment of your day.

The situation with parents is also very difficult, and I do not want to diminish that pain. Doing good sometimes comes with love, and sometimes simply with the intention of doing what is right. Learning to be kind while protecting your own limits is also a test. Allah knows the intention in your heart.

Please remember this: if, in the middle of all these storms, you are still asking, “How do I find my faith?” — that is the clearest sign that your faith is not gone. Perhaps you feel like you are failing this test, but sometimes passing a test simply means surviving it.

You are not alone. Start with small steps. Read a little, make short supplications, and do not burden yourself. Allah is very close to hearts that are broken