First time you ever experimented with self-harm?

I was 14, at a restaurant with my family, and I went outside to sit in the sun while they finished eating. There was a planter with woodchips nearby, and I found one with a sharp point. I used it to scratch my arm in a little line.

I don't remember why I started, what prompted that. I think it was mostly a cry for help. I was pretty depressed and anxious at that point in my life. I would leave every social interaction with a list of things I had done wrong. Not that it made me shy, I have always been loud and outgoing, I would just beat myself up for it (mentally) afterwards. I was also coping with the increased workload of school and feeling like I couldn't keep up.

I used the point of a drawing compass as well for a bit. Then I would just keep picking at the scabs. Eventually my mom saw them and we found a therapist. I think I'm glad I did, because I don't know if I would have gotten the help I needed otherwise, and I'm doing a lot better now.

I had a small relapse the other day. With a tack from a bulletin board. But I understand why I do it now, and why I shouldn't, and that makes it easier to stop.

@Laura

i was nine years old just in fourth grade when I started taking classroom scissors and anything sharp to try and cut myself open- looking back, I didn’t even realize what I was doing at the time, it was almost subconscious.