Traumatic Experiences Community Check In Thread - it's the weekend! June 30th and July 1st
Seems too late in many parts of the world to post a Friday thread, and too early in other parts to post a Saturday thread. So here I am unveiling an 'it's the weekend' thread! I reckon that covers all bases :)
So what's on your agenda today? What do you have in mind for tomorrow? What about your future, how would you like that to look? What's next for you?
@DeborahUK thanks for the thoughtful post. It is very hard not to look back and focus on today/tomorrow. Im very stuck in everything that happened. Almost feels like quicksand. This week been hard. Got a head cold which had made sleep evrn more difficult. Last night resorted to playing with the pharmacology of cold meds and alcohol to pass out. It worked tho flashbacks came in hard when woke.
Dont want to face today because I know unthinking relations will again make comments at this wedding reception. Me being married outside the culture and race has been a source of gossip and now this trauma justifies their reasoning on why it was wrong. Ive always been the traditionally submissive daughter and said nothing. With my grandparents gone now i dont know what im doing it for, but Im going tonight for them and my parents and Aunt. I dont want to be bitter or put my own issues ahead of family.
Coping at work is still a problem and having a hyped stress response isnt helping with crises on drug shortages every day. Therapist started emdr and trauma time line but is now going away for a month after next two sessions. Feel slightly abandoned and her suggestion to go see GP doc if needed is pointless. I dont need medicating or going through having to tell someone new every thing again.
Just raw and tired and fed up.
@inventiveOrange1 hugs Orange. I understand how you feel regarding your therapist. All I can say is we are here for you for that month. Maybe you can post your exercises here, that your therapist has been giving you, and we can help support you in continuing to work on them while she is away?
@inventiveOrange1
I hope that soon the wedding festivities will end and you can get home and recuperate somewhat.
never mind - if I read that correctly - you made it.
You've got so much to deal with and you are doing exceptionally well (even if you cannot see it for yourself).
I'm currently not planning anyhting, taking time off and going with the flow.It's less stressful and I like to spend my days this way a lot for now.Maybe that's what I needed the most-to stop rushing and just be, take it all slow.
@Morfo66 That sounds very nice :) I enjoy that, too.
What's next for me is just weekend stuff. Housecleaning and recharging.
Still hungover. Going to try not to drink the rest of the weekend. I've done all the little tricks to speed the recovery process along and now it's just down to the feeling ill and waiting it out. Wish I could sleep. Did it to myself but I never like to pay the price.
@themainjane hope you can be gentle with yourself. x
@inventiveOrange1
Thank you, Orange. That is very kind of you.
I am actually enjoying myself. But I'm not a social person. I don't enjoy being in groups. That's not fun or relaxing for me. So I've been in the kitchen all day, mostly watching tv, but also watching the oven and making sure things go in and come out as they need to. So I wish my family would just accept that I am not a social person like they are, and "come outside!" isn't something I want to do, and won't make me happy. I'm happier inside. I think that should be okay 🤷🏼♀️
@BeeLeigh
Agree with you Bee.. it is okay... should be okay.. to be your self. And sounds like you're doing very well in the kitchen, supervising it all.! Many of us are not social and don't want to "come outside" .. with you here.. so suggest you stay where you are and hopefully in time they will accept this too.
@rozie
They eventually came inside, so now we're watching a movie :)
