Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-in Thursday 26th October 2017
Good morning all!
Taking you with me this morning on the daily walk with my three dogs. Lots of energy and exuberance as they run up the metal road, pausing to sniff at interesting "doggy" smells.Then through the gate and into the paddock where they run and chase each other. Happy and safe. All of a sudden there is the sound of a heavy truck, not too far off. Its getting closer and I see Cassi, the bub, way over near the fence,and running towards the road. Panic hits. I call "Wait!" And she stops at the edge of the road and hold this position as the truck passes by. Huge relief and I'm proud of my wee girl. All the training has kicked in when needed in a potentially dangerous situation.
Like Cassi, we can be getting on with our day when out of the blue it seems,we are confronted with an attack from the inner critic. Pete Walker talks about developing "muscle' to use in this situation. Some thought substitition that can be engaged automatically to use quickly to stop the inner critic. But in order for this to happen we have to have trained our mind by repeating these thoughts over and over, almost like a mantra. And these thoughts are of positive qualities and strengths we have.( and if you can't think of too many or any ask someone who knows you well). By writing them down and reading them over and over, they can then become available to us in potentially challenging situations.The critic needs to be shut down and quickly....... "he/she isn't helping."
How is you day going? Some reflections on using thought substitution.. maybe you've used it.. maybe you want to experiment with this. Or pop in to say hi! Love to hear from you. This is your space and a safe place. x
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❤️
@WaterLily16
@melliotm
thanks! I
@melliotm
Hope youre feeling better today?
@WaterLily16 Thanks ❤️ I'm doing my best. One second at a time. How are you feeling?
@WaterLily16 Hey, so I'm just letting you know that I saw your name on the tag list now, but though the name was filled out, the @ was not, So I fixed it for you and it should show up now if they take from the original document, but it won't show up if they just copy someone else's post (which is done if people are in a rush because they have to put a space between every single name otherwise)
@Hoxenos Fantastic :) ❤️
@melliotm
I see you day in day out adding the tag list. You are so sweet to do it. I hope it is your honor and pleasure and not a burden.
Please don
Aaand everyone dont mind me. Im trying to wrap my mind around throwing some stuff away. Like even the empties. Why wouldnt I want to have them in the trash?
I guess because it makes it more real... that we are going to be an alcohol-free house? I dunno, I just dont know anymore.
@themainjane stay strong jane. Know you can get rid of it. Hugs
@themainjane
Agree wholeheartedly with you Jane. I so appreciate this support... thankyou Melli!
Wow - do I have an inner critic!
I try to do instant reframing of that nasty thought into, not an affirmation, but a true statment. - right away.
I do this automatically ) by paying attention and being mindful of course), a thought log (CBT) either instant or sometimes I have to even write it out. or sometimes I just have to fight back and " bark back" at that nasty thought.
anyways - my check in:
Today I have a phone assessment for php/inpatenient/ iop or therapy. I have been fighting for this for 6 months I can not beleive I found someplace. I am very scared and worroed that i will go throuhg the whole ordeal ( 1.5 hours) and they will say - see ya, your just fine. I do have a tendancy of coming acorsss way better than I am doing.
But this specifically treats childhood and adult trauma , ptds, and assorted other things.....( all of which fit me).
I am just: SCARED. And yes, thatmaybe my inner critic.
Send me good vibes please - i get the call in 20 min :/
@blissedNblessed sending you all the good vibes blissed. Hugs.
@inventiveOrange1
Thanks for the good vibes!
I got into the program! <3
@blissedNblessed glad to hear it x
@blissedNblessed
All the best! So hoping this comes through for you... do let us know. x
@rozie
Yay!
I got in! I got in!
I start November 2nd!
@blissedNblessed
I am so happy for you!
@Compassionatelistener108
Awwww, thanks.
me too
and i am so so so excited <3
@blissedNblessed Belated congrats! You deserve this! ❤️⛺
@blissedNblessed
@blissedNblessed
Oh what great news... so happy for you! And its not long till it starts. Well done! x
Hooray,
It is Thursday afternoon! It has been a busy week. My inner critic has been putting in overtime lately 😑. It can be really difficult to let go of those old perspectives when they have been reinforced over the years. Celebrating success no matter how small helps me a great deal. I think I need the tangible things on occasion to break through those walls. I love quotes as subtle reminders and keep them close to me. If I can taking a walk breaks the cycle of negative thoughts and my go to is almost always journaling. It frees my mind in ways similar to meditation techniques. Today is a good day so I am enjoying the beautiful weather and practicing gratitude.
@Compassionatelistener108
I love the way you write. Its somewhat melodious (if that is even a word 🙄). Do you enjoy writing?
@WaterLily16
Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. My day is brighter because of you. Hopefully my smile will be contagious. I am a voracious reader and enjoy writing immensely. 💛
@Compassionatelistener108
Good for you! Sounds like yu have alot of resources there that help to refute that critic. Agree its hard to change those old perspectives... takes time and patience. But noticing any small steps is positive and lets you know you're making progress. Happy Thursday! x
I urgently need to speak to a listener from trauma community! 😢
@WaterLily16
I'm not a real listener, but I'm here if you want me to listen. ❤️
@rozie
Hmm...
Been pretty broody and depressed lately. I haven't really been online here much, I read stuff but I don't have much initiative to respond out of fear of offending someone or something like that. Pair that with feeling rather misanthropic as of late...not good. Sometime soon I'll start corresponding a bit more, but I'm just trying to do what I can each day. Anyhow, hope you folks are fairing a bit better. And if not, hope things improve for you sooner rather than later. Ciao for now.
@CaloenasNicobarica
Good to hear from you!... we've have been missing you. Sorry that its been like this lately.. and hoping it will be better for you soon. Think you are wise to take one day at a time for now and take good care of yourself. No doubt about it this journey we are on has its ups and downs., and this too will pass. Thinking of you and here in support. Hug. x
One of my favorite things in the day when I start to struggle with thoughts and feelings that aren't necessarily the greatest or the flashbacks start to roar their ugly head is to come on here and just do one of the steps on the path, whatever that might be. I find that it is often just enough of an interruption that I can pull my mind back and recover from the horrible feelings that come with reliving those experiences.
I am so thankful to have found 7 cups. I have been in here using the path for over a year and until recently never got involved with the communities. Glad I have.
@EMSFireChic1985 Glad that you are finding the resources and community to be beneficial -- happy to have you join us! ☺️⛺❤️
Friday check in still appears to be pending as of this moment, so I'm going to pretend that it's Thursday 2.0. ☺️❤️
Relatively decently sleep, with the usual weird dreams (I will take "weird" over "triggering" any night JFTR). Been a long, emotionally challenging week for me, and I'm really feeling the accumulation of stress & symptoms today. So rather than push myself past the breaking point, I rescheduled my one obligation (an appointment this morning with my case manager 🙃), focusing my limited energy on self care and mental revitalization for the reminder of the day.
Allowing myself to enjoy a much needed compassionate pause (now with extra blanket fort). ⛺
@melliotm glad u realised u needed the break melli. Hugs
@inventiveOrange1 Hugs Orange ❤️ how are you doing?
@melliotm hope u ate.
been bad week. words are hard. Grandparents memorial this sunday. Dont want to see it or family. Cousins will be there with their newborns. Flashbacks been bad. Pressure to make decisions on future high. Dont want to exist anymore but still here. All i do is cause worry and pain. If i can talk to othrrs on here and help it makes a difference. Even that hard now. Dont feel welcome anywhere. No ones fault.
Hugs
@inventiveOrange1 Big hugs, Orange ❤️ I'm so sorry this week has been a struggle for you. Words aren't necessary (am finding them difficult myself today). Always glad that you're around. I did eat, thank you. Sounds like it is seriously fort o'clock ATM. ⛺ 🍫 Thank you for checking in.❤️One second at a time.
@melliotm This sounds so good and I'm really proud of you for being able to self care. So often we feel guilty for simply taking care of ourselves. Good job Mel :D
@Hoxenos Thank you. I still have to consciously address and refute the false sense of shame that still manifests when I assertively prioritize my immediate needs, especially in relation to trauma symptoms. But acceptance, patience and compassion all work together in concert with healing. It's definitely worth the effort, and like all things that require practice and exercise, is getting easier as time goes on.
Now to muster up the will/energy to make myself something to eat (one tiny step at a time).🐢🙃