Abused by a family member 😔

I am so sorry for what you have been through, if you would like to talk to someone you can send me a message. You are not alone in this community and we are all here to offer you support.

I know that life is never the same when you've been through a bad experience. But please try to look at positive parts of your life. Try talking about your feelings and moving forward with life. Try being more positive and do things that will help you feel better.

Hi Iam so sorry this happened to you. I think it takes a lot of strength and courage to talk about beingabused. I think that sometimes abuse isput away for years. But of course it doesnt go away. But you have such strength to want to deal with it. I know that many people have reclaimed their power from abuse by working on it in therapy. Do you think counseling would be right for you? Again, I am so sorry you were hurt like this.

Hi, sorry someone thought it was okay to treat you this way. It was without your permission and it was wrong. The heart ache of it all is that we are left to pick up the pieces and glue them back together. I have been in therapy for 2 plus years. Forgive me for saying this but there are many days when giving up seems easier. Just when I think I have control over my emotions, they explode and leave me hopeless. Therapy can help. I cannot talk about the details of my abuse to anyone. I hope you can find peace. I am still looking for it 35 years later.

Vicki,

you are obviously a very strong and amazing woman to share this, and I commend you and thank you for sharing your experience. But one thing sticks out. Every time , you were strong enough to put it to the side for years, and move on, and even have a wonderful relationship for 7 years, but rather than putting it aside love, when are you going to let it go, and let it be.I would like for you to write out exactly what happened in your story. Once you are done , read it to your loved one, over and over and over again, until you see and realize that it is just a story. It will make it easier to let oh and you will become stronger. You will be able to cope with it in your own way, I promise you. Give it a try to anything that's left a scar.

Hello,

Everyone else is correct that it is courageous to speak of something like this to others. 10 years ago I was abused by a younger sibling while I was sleeping. I woke up and caught him. I did not fully understand what was going on but my mom said it would be ok and she would fix it. Well, I was in high school and once it actually hit me at what happened, I felt so alone. I was not allowed to talk about it. But a week later I went to a friends house to get away from mine and found out that my mom caught my sibling doing it to her. When she told me she had him going to a therapist (mind you only for a week!) she said it was going to be fine. I could not hold it in anymore and thought it would be ok to talk to my school counselor about it since my mom was already taking care of it. It felt so good to let it out to someone but the walls all crashed down when the counselor had to contact cps. We came from a nice family and home and this thing that happened to us was completely out of the blue. We had no family history of this anywhere. Just a younger brother who was being influenced by an older boy showing him pornography. Well, my stepdad took my twin baby sisters from my mom until my brother took a lie detector test that said it only happened to me and my mom. They divorced. (They were on the verge before this incident occured.) So, instead of my mother talking to me about what we went through, she was in complete denial and then blamed ME for everything happening. I ran away for 2 months after that. Since then, my mom would never talk to me about it. We didn't finally talk about it until a few months ago. I had tried therapists and other things but every now and then something will trigger a traumatic experience and it does create a hard time for a while. I can't say that I really got over it, even though that is what my family said was to get over it. I was mad. Because he was younger he only got sent to a treatment facility for 2 years. He says he thinks it was enough. I thought his life should have been ruined like he ruined mine. My mother still has it come up every now and then because of her job which is at a treatment facility. The court tried to charge her with neglect of me. The week before CPS was involved, I had to sleep with a chair against my door bc there was no lock. That is no way for a person to have to be in their own home. I can talk about it more freely now and it does feel better to let it out. Just know that one day they will have to answer for their sins. I believe in karma and what goes around comes around. And even though my brother is not having his life ruined the way mine was, he has nothing. He is not in school, he did have a child but lost custody of it, he is mixed in with drugs and bad people, and he does not have a clean record which hurts his chances with getting a good paying job. I have accepted this has his karma. It took many years to deal with it, and yes there are triggers now and then, but it can get easier over the years if you allow yourself to move forward and lock it away in a box and sink it in the depths of the ocean.

Karma does exist. I have been abused my family members and people who were like family too me. I know it's hard to work through and I'm not over it but I mean it's putaside and I do get triggered at times. Like when my boyfriend hugs me from behind and I don't expect it. Or when someone touches my leg. So I know what it's like to get triggered. But one of the people who did that to me is suffering his consequences, nobody trusts him, his marriage is failed, he can't go to famy reunions and quite a few more. I'm sorry what your going through no one deserves to go through that.

Hi, New here with an old problem. I was abused by my grandfather as a child - no one knew or understood the signs of my trauma, and he convinced me I am a bad person not worth believing. He's been dead thirty years but I still live his message every day. I never think anyone respects me deep down, even though I have a good job and people say I do it well. I have few close friends because I hate to bother anyone, and I fear my up & down moods drive them crazy. I'm worried my son is going to suffer because of my depression, fears and anxiety. Inside I fear I'll be like this always. I would never consider suicide because of its effects on my son, but I can't lie - the idea goes through my mind often that I sometimes wish my abuser had just gone ahead and killed me, instead of sentencing me to a life of pain and fear. I try to live a good kind life, but every day is a struggle. It's like a long slow death. I guess I just needed to say that. Thank you.

Thank you to all who have posted on this thread. I appreciate your thoughts and hope you all find inner peace :)

Hey everybody, I didnt read all of the entries on here but it looked as though most were written by ladies. Im a guy and I experienced being sexually molested by my father when I was about 11 years old. He used the excuse that the doctors told him to do this to me due to hernia surgery as a baby. I was scared to say anything to anybody because all I could think of was my mom having to take care of 4 kids by herself and that my dad would do something worse to me. Its hard for me to talk about it. Nobody really knew about it until I saw a counselor for depression. I hadnt even said anything about it and she asked me out of the blue if I had been sexually abused as a kid. She is a great counselor. My mom passed away last year. She never knew anything about it.