Does anyone else feel like they're making it up?
(I sincerely apologize if I'm totally doing this wrong this is my first time trying to post on one of these forums)
It's hard to explain, because when I bring this up people usually say that they sometimes feel that way. But for me it's like, constant. I feel like I'm so confused all the time, and all the details are so hazy I am always second-guessing myself. It's almost like if not for bodily trauma and PTSD, I could just as well say it hadn't ever occurred.
I don't know, does anyone else ever feel that way?
@gregsburyfields
I feel u.. ur not alone
I feel that way all the time, it's okay
Me too - I struggle with this so much, especially because the memory is hazy, it's a horrible feeling. Reading about what is consent and other people's stories usually helps validate me that this did indeed happen and that it's not my fault. The second-guessing is very normal and many people don't fully realize what happened to them until months and sometimes years later.
I feel this way all the time, it’s really hard
Definitely feel like this, I can barely remember anything.. I used to think that maybe I just made it worse to justify my current feelings, etc etc. But what I've learned, is that your trauma isn't lying. If you are experiencing ptsd, something boundary crossing *did* happen and you are in your right to feel the way you do. Doubting yourself seems to be natural in a situation like this, but I hope you can get some clarity for yourself at some point. If it's not about what happened, then at least in your feelings. Love, pien
*TW* I can’t remember much either. I was sexually abused when I was a child and I can’t actually pin point an age it started at, I only have a few memories but enough to know it actually happened but all throughout my childhood it was buried deep in my mind and I wasn’t sure if it was real or not. Only in the recent years memories have started coming back to me more clearly
Absolutely - this is one of my biggest fears, particularly of being caught out, of my memories failing me at a critical point. It's one of the things I struggle with the most, the inability to 'put my finger on it', to know definitively what happened, and to fill in the gaps. Only thing that keeps me sane (or thereabouts!) is that the flashbacks are so vivid, vivid enough that I'm sure the memories are real.
