One thing on my mind right now is......

I

I wish I could sleep better. Fun facet of depression.

I hate my therapist!!!​​​​​​

I need quiet. I need solitude. And I want to have it out here in the living room, because that's where I get the most artistic inspiration. I just want everything to stop for a while, just for a few hours.

You said one thing, so although I have far too many I'll share the oje I need to get out to deal with the others.

I often find myself feeling like there's something wrong with me because I like to debate and argue and discuss with people. I'm not a really emotional person about it, either, though very passionate because I like and know what I debate about and learn what I don't so I can. Amd I can't actually understand where emotions have a place in such a discussion anyway, unless it is specifically stated that we are discussing with an actual emotion intentionally. But so many people avoid confrontation of any sort -though some won't avoid confrontation, just discussion- or only use emotion as basis for argument and I don't get it. I do not understand. And I hate seeing people angry, though I make people angry a lot because rather than avoid a discussion I'd like to start one. They're entertaining, educational. It's the kind of social interaction I get energy from, while small talk and hearing about the people I'm talking to bore and exhaust me. Who wouldn't feel like something is wrong with them under those circumstances? But is something actually wrong with me? And why am I bad person to so many people for thinking and questioning how they think so I can better understand them and their point of view, as well as how they came to a certain conclusion?

Whether I'll ever have a stable frienship, let alone relationship, ever again. I have depression, anxiety and PTSD, and those are always getting in the way and ruining things for me.

how i hate how i keep saying that im okay when im not. when i tell my friends not to worry, when i need their help. im too scared of being a burden and just dumping all of my problems on them, so i just dont say anything. ill day ill get over it when i know i wont.

I'm thinking a lot about my future. I know I want to help people, but I'm not sure what path to take.

Tomorrow I have to apply for enrollment into college. I'm feeling very nervous. I guess I could call them after gaining confidence by talking to my counselor.

How I wish I could get things off my mind but I know I have out done my Welcome