What should I do? An openly gay friend is hiding his feelings for me (woman) and he is fighting it?
Last Updated: 08/13/2019 at 3:57pm
Theresa Gulliver, Registered Clinical Counsellor
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Top Rated Answers
If he hasn't expressed his feelings yet, you have no way to be 100% sure of what he feels. Maybe he's taking his time to explore his own feelings and understanding what it means, and when a person is in a questioning phase, the best thing to do is to respect their wish to keep it for themselves until they decide to share it. Pushing people can be counterproductive, moreover, you can't be sure that the impression you have about his feelings is true. Just make sure to be there for him if he decides to open up.
I would accept him and just let him know you are there for him and let him know you care about him so he can feel safe to share with you. OR depending on how close you guys are. You can say, I have the feeling you like me, and I wrong? Try to get clarity. Share the incidences that made you feel that he is having feelings for you. Be clear also with yourself, write it down in your journal before you meet to be sure you know what you want to say. Be as open and non judgmental as you can be so he doesn't feel shame in his confusion if it's true. Good luck :)
That actually depends on the situation. A lot of people are under the impression another person is attracted to them. However this might not be true at all, and you can not be sure unless he confesses to you. I think that if he is actually openly gay he can not have a crush on you, unless he is bi, or course. I think you should talk to him in order to sort things out. It might be awkward but it will be better for both of you, especially in case this is true so he does not have to keep fighting his feelings. However if he IS attracted to you and you are not you shouldn't give him hopes because that might break his heart.
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