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intelligentAvocado8214
3,799 M Seeking Light 3
PathStep 12 Compassion hearts88 Forum posts34 Forum upvotes46 Current upvotes46 Age GroupAdult Last activeOctober, 2022 Member sinceSeptember 24, 2018
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Depressed & confused and stressed
General Support / by intelligentAvocado8214
Last post
 October 13th, 2022
...See more I'm gonna try to make this short and simple, my bf of 5 years watched porn behind my back(even though I told him I considered it cheating) for over a year. When I found out he lied to me for 2 years telling me things like "you aren't good enough" "those women are perfection" "it's all your fault and so on and so fourth. We broke up because of that, then when we got back together instead of having it as a fresh start like intended he tries to get nudes from women online of which he sexted when we were apart. Here I am almost a year later after catching him trying to get nudes, depressed and being angry at myself that I can't get over the past and all the hurt and pain he caused me. Wondering if I'll ever be enough for him or if I should just let him go. I feel ugly with myself and not good enough for him. I just don't know what to do. He hasnt done anything in the past year that I know of and he's treating me good I just want all the pain from the past to go away
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Lies, cheating. Donno what to do
Relationship Stress / by intelligentAvocado8214
Last post
 August 2nd, 2022
...See more My bf of 5 years watched porn which I don't care aboutporn but he hid it from and lied to me about it for 2 years by saying "they were better" "they were more experienced for me" "you aren't good enough" "you should have been better" and many more to the point where we broke up for 2 weeks. After we got back together he tried to get nude pictures from other women and thought it was okay to do since he wasn't doing anything to them. I stupidly stayed with him even after he cheated on me and it's been 6 months and our relationship is better but I still feel insignificant for him and not good enough and not attractive enough for him. Idk what to do.
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Narcissistic abuse
Relationship Stress / by intelligentAvocado8214
Last post
 April 7th, 2023
...See more For the last 2 years my bf has been telling really mean and hateful things cause I found out that he watched porn. And instead of just telling me the truth he told me that I wasn't good enough for him, I was unattractive, porn was better than me, I didn't put out when he wanted me to, that I was just too anorexic (which I'm not), that he could feel the pornstars on his penis when he was getting off, and their reactions were because of him, he BLAMED ME for HIM watching porn. Every mean and hateful thing he was telling me he swore was the truth and forced it down my throat as such. to the point where he made me believe them as the truth. All of his lies caused us to argue constantly because I would question the lies he told me. Then after arguing he would promise that he would change for the better and stop lying, things would be good for a couple days and he would go right back to hurting me . All the arguments and fake promises lead to us breaking up for a couple weeks, and getting back together as a FRESH START everything was good for about 2 weeks until I found out that he had been asking women for nudes behind my back since we had gotten back together. When I had asked about it he told me that he has NO SEXUAL INTENTIONS for the pictures. "I just wanted a picture to have a picture" When I did find out about the nudes he told me the truth and deleted the app of which he was asking on. And admitted that he was very manipulative and narcissistic and wants to actually change for the better. But I don't trust him he has hurt me so much but I don't see being with anyone else. And idk what to do, I'm just so scared that he'll hurt me again.
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New start?
Relationship Stress / by intelligentAvocado8214
Last post
 June 14th, 2022
...See more Hello all, about 6 months ago me and my bf of 5 years had broke up for 2 weeks because our relationship was very toxic. During those 2 weeks we didn't talk at all. When I came back home him and I sat down and talked things through and decided to get back together if there was change, not to go down the same toxic road we had went down. After 2 weeks of us being back together it was great, until I found out that he had been asking for nudes from other women on Reddit, Kik, and even adding them on Snapchat to try to get nudes. I confronted him about it and he told me the truth, which I really appreciated but it didn't change the way I felt since he had told me before we broke up that I wasnt good enough or attractive enough to him. A week later I found that he had taken pictures and videos of himself in very sexual manors to send to them if he had received a nude he was so desperately wanting. It's been 6 months since then but I still feel like he's hiding things, and I can't trust anything that he tells me, I feel like I have to constantly ask him for the truth. Idk what to do
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Advice please
Relationship Stress / by intelligentAvocado8214
Last post
 April 6th, 2022
...See more My bf and I have been dating for the past 5 years. We were our firsts sexually we met when we were 16. When he went to night school for senior year he had started watching porn of which I didn't want him too. A year after that we had moved in together and I found out about the porn. After I found out he lied to me for almost 2 years saying things like "they were better, more attractive, I wanted them more, I had sex with them, I wish you dressed like a slut, I wish you could have fucked like a pornstar" and more horrible things. All the horrible things he said to me lead to argument after argument cause he had made me believe them as the truth. That fighting went on for the 2 years he was telling the lies to me causing us to break up. We were apart for a month before getting back together, we both wanted to change for the better so we agreed to start over with each other. While we were apart he looked and asked other women for nudes while also having his own saved on his phone to send to them. But when we got back together he continued to ask for their nudes until I found out. It's been 2 months since I caught him asking for nudes and he's been allot better. I just don't trust him after everything he has done, some days I'm conflicted over weather I should stay or go. I just feel scared at either option. I don't want to leave since he's been doing better but I don't want to stay either. I'm just not sure what to do.
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2nd chance?
Relationship Stress / by intelligentAvocado8214
Last post
 March 3rd, 2022
...See more My boyfriend of 5 years was asking other women for nudes. He said he wasn't going to do anything if he got them he just wanted them. But he had sexual pictures and videos to send to them if he had gotten one sent to him saved on his phone ready to send out. He said he had forgotten about the pictures and videos he had the intention to send out. He has been a compulsive lier for the longest time and I'm not sure if he actually forgot. Because of his lies I question everything that comes out of his mouth. He says he wants to be a better man, and not a cheater, to regain my trust and to love on me. But I'm just scared that I'm not good enough for him and that I'll always be 2nd best to other women. Idk what to do...
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Pictures
Relationship Stress / by intelligentAvocado8214
Last post
 February 8th, 2022
...See more My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. We argued allot for a while because of things he said and did that really hurt me. We broke up for 2 weeks no contact at all. When we talked again we got back together in a fresh start. He looked at nudes from other women during our fresh start, I found out 2 weeks later, and since then things have been okay, he says he was sorry and he didn't know why he did it. Well, last night I found out within the 2 weeks we were apart he took dick picks and videos of him touching himself to send to the women he was trying to get nudes from. He swears he doesn't remember doing it at all, that he couldn't control it. Which makes me think he probably did it after we had gotten back together as well, since he was still trying to get nudes. I don't know what to do, or what to believe.
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