The Importance of Sharing Your Heart for Your Mental Health
In this excerpt from "7 Cups for the Searching Soul," learn how to surround yourself with caring people you can trust
Sharing what is in our hearts makes us feel vulnerable.
Sharing means letting someone in. It means opening up and talking with them about something that is troubling you. You are giving the other person power. If the person isn't trustworthy, then they can hurt you.
At any given time, 30-40% of us are struggling. Think of the last 10 people you met. 3 or 4 of them are going through a hard time right now. It would be really hard to tell which 3 or 4 needed help because many of us do not feel safe being vulnerable. We keep up a front because we are rightfully afraid of being judged.
Cup 1 (of the 7 Cups) is about sharing what is on your heart with a trusted person. It involves opening up, being vulnerable, and learning to lean on people for support.
Understanding Your Peer Network
Understanding your peer network is important because it influences how you feel on a daily basis.
What you see on that piece of paper is a representation of your peer network. Interesting, right? Give yourself a moment to look at it and just jot down any other thoughts or insights that come to mind when you look at it.
Now, consider these questions. How many of those people did you deliberately invite to be in that network? How many have you arbitrarily picked up along the way because you lived near, worked with, or played sports with them? Of those that are more arbitrary, if you didn't live near them, would you still choose them for a friend?
You are hereby granted conscious permission to think clearly about and choose who you would like to have as friends.
This goes for all of the people in your life, including co-workers and, even, family members. As Harper Lee said, "You can pick your friends, but you sho can't pick your family." That is true, but you can choose how much time or how important the people in your family are to you (except, of course, your own children). I'm not advocating cutting people out of your peer network. I'm just suggesting that you be deliberate about who gets to be a big circle.
You want to be mindful of who you let into your peer network and also be deliberate about shrinking the circles of those who are unhelpful.
We understand that finding safe people can be challenging. We built 7 Cups so kind people could find one another much more readily.
We all have an (emotional) gas tank, or for the purposes of 7 Cups, a teacup, that gets low from the challenges we face. Cup 1 is all about learning to let someone fill up your tank. When your cup gets full you are in a much better position to help fill someone else up.
Ready to move on the next "Cup?" Click here for the 7 Cups for the Searching Soul online guide or here to download the free e-book.