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why we fear abandonment

User Profile: pamharley003
pamharley003 September 22nd, 2025

No one wants to feel abandoned, as it can lead to feelings of loneliness, being lost, and unwanted. Experiencing abandonment may cause trust issues, a fear of commitment in relationships, and emotional distance.


Sometimes, we might not recognize the signs of abandonment. Abandonment issues are often linked to an insecure attachment style. Some common signs of feeling abandoned include:


- **Fear of Rejection:** You may become anxious that the people in your life will leave you and not return.

- **Difficulty Trusting Others:** Building trust in a relationship can be challenging, especially if you have been lied to or cheated on in the past.

- **Overdependence:** You might find yourself relying heavily on others, particularly in romantic relationships.

- **Jealousy and Possessiveness:** When you see your partner with someone of the opposite sex, feelings of jealousy may arise as you worry about their relationship.

- **Low Self-Esteem:** You may feel disappointed in yourself, questioning what you did wrong to cause someone to leave. This can lead to feelings of depression, sadness, and loneliness.


Coping with feelings of abandonment can help us understand why someone may leave us. It's useful to start by educating ourselves about our feelings of loneliness. Building self-esteem is crucial; we need to believe in ourselves before we can trust others. Setting boundaries regarding our wants and expectations can also protect us from future hurt.


We can actively seek solutions to address these issues to prevent them from recurring. Utilizing coping skills can help us improve ourselves, making us better individuals for our relationships.


How do you feel when others abandon you? What steps can you take to alleviate feelings of loneliness and connect with others?


For more assistance, refer to the article: [The Fear of Abandonment](https://positivepsychology.com/fear-of-abandonment/#how-to-overcome-fear-of-abandonment).

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User Profile: Amanda84
Amanda84 September 22nd, 2025

@pamharley003

The biggest thing I feel is hurt, lack of appreciation and not seen! Or you can feel not enough!

User Profile: WharfRat
WharfRat September 22nd, 2025

How do you feel when others abandon you?

I wonder what I did wrong.  What did I do to make them stop liking me?  Why can't they accept me the way I am?

What steps can you take to alleviate feelings of loneliness and connect with others?

I don't know.


User Profile: dhabib
dhabib September 22nd, 2025

@pamharley003 I did it’s awful  it’s not really good for me it’s dealing my mental health not having enough sleep 

User Profile: amiablePeace77
amiablePeace77 September 22nd, 2025

@pamharley003

When I feel lonely, I usually go out for a walk and try to chat with a neighbor, someone at the roadside or anyone who is available. Being outside always helps.

User Profile: eternalHero77
eternalHero77 September 25th, 2025

@pamharley003 My issues around abandonment is when people pass away-no 8 times out of 10 it was not the person(s) fault but there is no replacing for me what I had with those people. The other part I feel abandoned due to my history of epilepsy not only do a portion of people get nervouse hearing it but dont know how to respond when seizures occur. It leaves me feeling as if I am different and ashamed from having it as I have had several walk away once they learned I had it.

User Profile: blindSunshine6361
blindSunshine6361 September 27th, 2025

So true@pamharley003

User Profile: Goodtogo1
Goodtogo1 September 27th, 2025

I struggle with that abandonment. I smother people in an attempt to keep them around, I try to be super nice, I try to be someone I'm not. I lose myself in the process! And now, I feel my friends are gone. But I look at this as an opportunity to connect with God (I feel He's abandoned me too!) and get to know the real me. I'm already seeing something now.

User Profile: daydreammemories
daydreammemories October 2nd, 2025

@pamharley003

How do you feel when others abandon you?
a deep feeling of insecurity, or that i wasn't enough or didn't do enough
 What steps can you take to alleviate feelings of loneliness and connect with others?
lean more towards internal validation rather than external ones. 


User Profile: dhabib
dhabib October 2nd, 2025

@pamharley003 abandonment is sad it’s really sad it makes me feel loaded ,I been at the stage it’s hard to accept the bad my dad made me accept the bad this week he yelled at me twice he was enraged and very angry grouchy and he has surgery before Halloween 🎃 it’s only me I’m focusing on just me I’m paying attention me needing me for assistance it’s will critical high maintenance I feel abandonment I feel unfinished not really completion something 

User Profile: eternalHero77
eternalHero77 October 12th, 2025

@pamharley003 For me fear of abandonment is two fold 1. Not having anyone to turn to, not having anyone who loves and cares bout me. On the other side of it I have epilepsy and being abandoned and alone scares the cramp or of me in fear that if something’ were to happen to me while I’m alone no one would know I’m in trouble till it’s too late to do anything to help me.