Feel so alone
I am a woman getting close to my 30s with a two year old. Recently his dad abandoned us so the loneliness has hit me harder since he’s been gone. I’ve joined support groups and tried putting myself out there but I been having a hard time connecting and making new friends. My current friends aren’t dependable and don’t give me the same energy I give to them. Just tired of feeling this feeling. Any advice or anything you guys do to help with this feeling.
@proactiveWheel7710
I'll be your friend <3
You are so sweet ❤️
Tell us more about you? <3 I’m Kiara. I’m in my 30s :)
I’m from Washington. Where are you from? I’m a momma to a two year old boy. I like to have deep conversations I love the summer time. I am a very loyal person that gives 100% in all my relationships. Oh I have 2 cats I love so much as well
I’m in the US, but I prefer not to share my location. Safety reasons and all that lol
Awww I bet he’s adorable <3
I LOVE deep convos <3
Ooh do tell us about the kitties! :)
Oh I get it. I have the grumpy faced looking cats they really are so cute. I saw in your profile you are a born again Christian I been trying to get into church but been having trouble finding a home church. But I feel God calling me during these hard times
Awww is that a specific breed? Or are they just grumpy hehe
I think it’s time :) You said you’re in your 30s, right? (I think lol). Can you find a YA group? That might fit you well :) Or a parents’ group.
They are long haired Persians they look grumpy lol. I’m about to be 30 this year … what’s a YA group? I’ve tried finding in person groups but have a hard time connecting
Awww <3
Young adult Bible study. Much easier to connect with peers :) Most churches have one, at least in my area. Check their websites :)
Why a hard time connecting?
@jesusredeemedme2425 oh I’ll definitely look into that. I honestly don’t understand why I have a hard time connecting. When I was younger early 20s and teen/child I had friends but as I grew older I started cutting people out my life because I realized they weren’t real friends or secret jealousy. And now adays I have low self esteem because of trauma I’ve gone through because of my past relationships/past trauma. I just feel like I’m too awkward at times
Oh that’s totally me. I’m autistic with social anxiety lol! But I make friends easily because I love hard <3
@proactiveWheel7710
Loneliness can be so challenging. I struggle with it as well. One great method I've discovered is... 7cups! I've made so many lasting friendships on here. There's something about meeting people over sharing struggles and challenges before you know their names and without even knowing what they look like or where they're from that is so fulfilling and refreshing. Gone are all the anxieties that come from meeting new people face to face, and gone are all the nasty judgements people make about others. Instead you find true connection and friendship!
I love this, this is a great description of 7Cups :)
@courageousRiver589 you are very right about that. I just downloaded this app so I’m still getting familiar with it and getting the gist of it. I really hope I can make some friends on here even if it’s just virtual
You can very easily! If you click with someone, make a penpal chat :)
How do I do that
Go to penpal chats, and create a new thread. Tag the other person in it, and write something like, “If you’re not @____ or @____, please don’t read or comment.” Then you two (or a group of people!) can chat as much as you want :)
Can people see the conversation? Like is it public conversation?
It’s public, but if you write what I wrote, it will keep a lot of people out hehe! So it’s a bit less open, so to speak. Does that make sense?
@proactiveWheel7710
Welcome aboard!! You will love it here. Happy to chat anytime :)
@courageousRiver589 that means so much to me more than u will ever know. Just need solid support right now
@proactiveWheel7710 I'm so sorry his dad abandoned the best gift life could give him. Your 2 year old is now your best friend and I hope his innocence will give you the energy to go on while you find other supportive people to show you compassion that you deserve. My love for your adorable toddler and prayers for both of you ❤️
@Creamyyy I just wish it was different and I could have been with a man who does appreciate what a woman goes through to create a family. And the only reason I’m getting through this is because of my son. I have no other support in my life right now. My son literally gives me life
@proactiveWheel7710 you believe in family. You sound pure and wise. I feel your pain.
Hey proactive 👋🏽 I hope you're doing alright today. I'm sorry about your child's father abandoning you and your child. That's no way to show appreciation for the woman who had children for you. It's understandable that you're going through a really tough time with this and I do hope that things get better. I think they will get better. I think the problem is with the people closest to you. If they aren't giving you the support you need and aren't reciprocating the same energy then you can leave those relationships feeling even more drained on top of raising a child on your own. I think it's great that you've outsourced and tried to make connections with other people. I too struggle with connecting with others. For most of my life I've been belittled, abandoned, abused from the people I thought I was supposed to trust the most. So when I go to make connections with people, I'm scared to get to close and I'm scared that people will see how insecure I feel or maybe they'll see that I'm inadequate. It's scary opening up to new people because you don't know if they'll accept you or not. But if people don't accept you, if people don't support you the way you support them and they're not able to give you what you need, that's ok. That's not a reflection of you or your ability to connect. I understand the loneliness you must feel. My advice would be to listen to your intuition about people. Know that you have a compass inside guiding you and helping you to navigate all of this. If something doesn't feel right with someone, keep looking until it does. It's ok to proceed things with caution. Right now, given everything that's been going on, I think it's appropriate to handle yourself with care. Don't give up. Your people are out there for you, people who are just like you looking to connect as well and probably feel lonely too. I know it's scary but things will work out. You're doing great, you're doing all you can and that's what matters. That's what's going to get you where you need to go. I hope this message wasn't too long haha but I really have hope for you and your situation. Stay strong.
@beautifulcarnation444 don’t worry about your message being too long ❤️ it really spoke to me and touched my heart and I could relate so much to it. I’m not the best at expressing myself but the part where you said “I’m scared that people will see how insecure I feel or maybe they’ll see I’m inadequate” really resonated with me. I never knew how to explain that feeling but that’s why I don’t reach out more for fear of rejection and people realizing how insecure I am. It’s a very scary feeling to be vulnerable . I really hope and pray I can connect with people who relate to me. It’s such a weird feeling because when I was younger I had friends but I guess I never realized I never had true friends around me or true support . I get such intense fear sometimes because I feel like this is just how life is going to be from now on.. just loneliness .. but sometimes I have hope that I’ll make at least one genuine friend and hope is what gets me through the day.
You will make friends :) Keep posting, and responding to other people’s posts, and you’ll make friends super easily! Be like your username… Proactive. <3
Also, respond to “needs reply” posts! You might meet some others who are new too :)
I'm so happy you were able to relate to my message. Don't worry, you express yourself just fine :) And that's the hard part about connecting with people is finding people who are like you especially if you're really trying and it doesn't work out. It can become pretty discouraging. I can be a recluse and shut people out. It can even come off cold sometimes but it's because I'm trying to protect myself. I've always had like one or two friends, never liked being in large crowds. It tends to be a bit overstimulating and emotionally draining to be around a bunch of people. It's ok to feel insecure, I think everyone is at least a little bit even if they don't show it. I can relate to what you're saying about the intense fear you get because you feel like this is how life will be. I get that way too. Like what if I'm stuck in this cycle and I can't change? What if no one will ever want to be my friend or what if I never find anyone who's genuine... I have all those fears too, you're not alone.
I gladly will be your friend. Can we add somewhere or is it restricted here to share usernames?
@luke1905 are we able to direct message people through here?
You can make a penpal chat :)
I truly don't understand how a man can do that. Im sorry to hear it. A child is the most beautiful gift someone can have, literally everytime I see one kid my heart melts, but at the same time is challenging, but is the best challenge someone can have, also I understand is more difficult for a single woman. My own mother have to do it with me and with my brothers, let me tell you something. We are the reason the reason that despite being alone with four boys, we are the reason why she continued fighting and continues to fight. Single moms impressed me always because they are taking two roles in the most lovely and humble way. I know loneliness is difficult, more if you don't have the other part who can give you stability or even family or friends, but now you have the most precious gift, love him, and believe me, your not really alone, at least here you have lovely and wonderful people to share you struggles. I wish i have better words for you, because you deserve the world, and pure and unconditional love, but Ill be here everytime you need someone, just to chat or talk something. Your get true this I promise. I wish you the best and I'm going to pray a lot for you and for that boy.
@proactiveWheel7710 i am so sorry to hear that. I can understand your feeling as i also lost my dad. I also think that having same great friends or alteast a loving arm can help you moveon. You can also text me and ask discuss share or just talk to me about anything you want. We can also be good friends if you say so as i like to make new friends and talking to new people or supporting people to start their new life
Being a caregiver without a support system can feel incredibly lonely—I’ve been there, and I truly relate to everything you’ve shared. I was socially awkward for most of my life and often felt scared and insecure about connecting with people. But sometimes, that one genuine friend shows up when you least expect it.
Just know you’re not alone. So many people are quietly struggling with loneliness and also searching for real, meaningful connections.
This phase won’t last forever, even if it feels endless right now. If you ever want to talk or just need a friend, feel free to reach out. 💛
@Bubbles0909 did you ever find your one genuine friend? Sometimes it feels like it will never happen? And I appreciate you so much
