What is Triangulation? 3 Steps to Avoiding & Stopping it from happening in the community
Hello everyone,
I'm writing to discuss the very important topic of triangulation.
It's come to my attention that some members may be engaging in this behavior without realizing the negative impact it has.
To ensure clarity, I want to define what triangulation is and explain why it is so unhelpful to our community.
(@Lee has also provided valuable insight on this topic here)
Triangulation occurs when a conflict or issue that exists between two people is brought to involve a third person.
Example:
If person A and person B (both 7 Cups users, whether a listener or a member) have a personal issue with one another, they should resolve it directly between themselves.
If person A involves person C in their issue with person B, this is considered triangulation.
Triangulation can happen to anyone. While it can be tempting to seek external support for a two-person conflict from someone else, it ultimately creates a negative outcome for everyone involved. If direct conflict resolution isn't possible, please connect with a community manager by filing a report through our Help Desk
Conflict resolution through clear, calm, and honest conversation is challenging and requires overcoming fear, but when handled correctly, it benefits all parties. Remember, we all come from different backgrounds, and sometimes words or phrases can unintentionally seem intimidating.
Why is Triangulation Harmful?
It’s harmful because:
It leads to the spread of information, potentially causing harm to those involved.
It facilitates the spreading of rumors.
It exposes a private situation between two users to a wider audience, violating confidentiality.
If someone approaches you for support regarding a situation that occurred within the listener community, here is what you must do:
Never share the names of any users involved.
Never share specific details of a chat or private interaction.
If someone begins to share a triangulated issue with you, please respond with this statement:
"I am sorry this happened! It sounds like a challenging situation. To avoid triangulation, it would be best for you to practice conflict resolution with the person involved. If direct conflict resolution isn't possible, please notify a community manager by filing a report through our Help Desk. To preserve confidentiality, please do not share this situation with other users."
Special Note: You should avoid triangulation with all other users, including mentors, group moderators, peer supporters, and mentor leaders. If a situation cannot be resolved through direct conflict resolution, the proper procedure is always to file a report through our Help Desk.
You can also reach out to Ambassadors or Admins to help facilitate a conflict resolution between you and the other person, that way the two of you get support by working through your challenges in a safe way.
As listeners, we all share the responsibility to stop triangulation when we encounter it or are asked to participate in it. This commitment is vital for maintaining a healthy and positive community.
I challenge everyone to take the Avoiding Triangulation Pledge:
"In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence."
Other helpful information:
In all of my interactions on 7 Cups of Tea, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumours and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence.
Signed: Emily 1/15/16
Important post here. Thanks for making us all aware on this topic.
In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence.
Signed: Jace 1/15/16
In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence.
Signed: MissZ 01/15/2016
"In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence. "
Signed: picturesque03afterthought 1/16/16
This is a great post @Laura! Actually yesterday I was in a similar situation. A listener came to me to ask for help and she started telling me about the problems the person she was talking to had. I didn't feel like that was ok, and I was too busy to take the person, so I suggested the listener to refer the person to another one. I didn't know what to do and that seemed like a reasonable option. So I'm glad you're providing info about this now and letting the community know that it's not helpful.
"In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence. "
Signed: Cuddling 1/15/16
this is a really good post, thank you laura! i was in a similar situation a few weeks back, and i'm glad that this post can guide us through similar situations in the future! thanks!
As a listener in our community, it is your responsibility to stop triangulation when you see it or are invited to participate in it. Doing this will keep our community healthy and moving in a positive direction. I challenge you all to take the Avoiding Triangulation Pledge:
"In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence. "
Signed: buttonedprincess 1/16/16
In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence.
Signed: Cat 1/15/16
In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence.
Signed: Dew 1/15/16
In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence.
SmokeyStar - 1/15/16
Avoiding Triangulation Pledge:
"In all of my interactions on 7 Cups, I will work to maintain healthy relationships and a supportive environment by stopping the spread of rumors and misinformation. I will maintain professionalism by not involving myself in conversations or situations which do not include me or require my presence. "
Signed: PsyHounds 1/15/16
