What is giving you MOST pain?
What aspect of your life or your surroundings ia giving you most pain?
I think everyone has one issue that is more painful than another and over time things change as well and something else becomes more painful. There are health issues, relationship issues, family issues, loss of loved ones, faith crises, work failures, the list can go on.
For me - seeing the suffering of little children whether those in war zones or poverty regions or those facing trapped in abusive places gives me most pain. Children are innocent and beautiful and they deserve all the gentle nurturing so that they can blossom and grow and take reins of the world .... their future is in the hands of adults because we are their guardians.
My deepest deepest wish is to play some role in helping the children of this world.
I'd like to hear your stories too - of what is troubling you the most and why. Please feel free to share .
Not being heard and understood.
Injustice in the world.
@adorableGrace87 totally 😞
We’re on the same page. 🫂
Adults do a lot to make children's dreams shatter too, even if they don't mean to
@Ahmedaka yes true... adults can tend to impose their dreams on children instead of helping them achieve theirs... I personally find it good to have feedback from everywhere but then I make my own choices once I'm clear I know where my heart truly is.... one has to reason and experiment with ideas ...
@Creamyyy What gives me the most pain is how broken my family is. Not from divorce or death, but from decisions my father has made. My father has alienated himself from his mother, sister, brother, and his father. He goes out of his way to avoid their calls. We are hours away from any extended family. And due to this, I have not spoken to my grandmother in years. Nor my aunt. I have never spoken to my uncle. And in my 18 years of life I have only spoken to my grandfather once. My father is also verbally and emotionally abusive towards me. In the past physically. My sister and my mother doesn’t see it. My brother sees it but the two of us can’t do anything about it. I take the brunt of the abuse. Either because I can’t shut my mouth or because I just annoy him. He has effectively made me alone. What hurts most is I have my grandmothers phone number but I do not want to contact her in fear that she will call my mom. My parents don’t know I have her number.
@BlueJay06 physical abuse isn't acceptable. I hope you stay safe and please play it smart to ensure your safety first and foremost. Your emotional isolation is understandable. On one hand your father isn't treating you with respect and on the other you are disconnected from your larger family. Do you think you could connect with others to build a support system for yourself? It's not a replacement for the belonging you seek in your family but it might help you close some wounds.
@Creamyyy I’m not sure who to reach out to. I can’t reach out to family, I have to jump through hoops to see any of my friends, I can text them but they have their own lives so we don’t talk much. I have no one else.
@BlueJay06 how about people to talk to online on apps like these? I was really isolated and someone from 7cups only suggested me to go on social media platforms and engage with people... I took that suggestion and then on YouTube and *** posted comments on current affairs and things going on.... people started liking my comments and even replying and even though it's very random- not exactly friendship- I started feeling socially engaged and that made me feel happy... I'm just sharing my story incase it can offer any way out .
@Creamyyy Being on 7 cups is a risk for me. I am not allowed to do anything online, but I felt like I had to talk to someone. Which is why I decided to risk it. If he found out, there would be very bad consequences. For my safety, I am not willing to risk adding social media accounts.
@BlueJay06 I'm sorry I can't think of any solutions at the moment but I'll pray for you... prayer can open doors that people can't by themselves
@Creamyyy Thank you so much creamyyy
@Creamyyy my parents ill health pains me 🥺 and the heartbroken scenes of devastation going on in Gaza just breaks my heart everyday ♥️
@Amanda84 may God give good health to your parents. I'm glad they have a child who cares sincerely for them. Yeah visuals from Gaza are truly horrifying - that's what made me realise one must try to do something more than prayer.. even if it is raising some awareness or writing something to give women opinion.. maybe step by step it could lead to something bigger.. it's so sad that organisations responsible for creating peace aren't calling for a ceasefire or helping establish dialogue.
@Amanda84 typing error: give opinion. I don't know how "women" got added there.
@Creamyyy it's terrible how deafening the silence from other countries is 🥺💜
Loosing friends that I absolutely did not want to loose.
They're the only thing I talk on this forum and I don't get better
For whatever reason I can't let go and still feel so much guilt. I just woken up from a bad dream with them in it and I still feel so bad and lost.
It's really not a awful problem but I feel like this breakup traumatised me. I really didn't want them to be a lesson and I'm hurting everyday
@67Flo76 wishing you healing and renewal of friendships that are best for you ❤️
Thanks a lot have a good day !
@Creamyyy
what has been giving me the most pain is for the last several months I’ve felt an absence of normal emotions and feeling. I don’t know what’s wrong with me but there are honestly not many people in my life who I feel comfortable even mentioning that I have a problem too. Many of these people have problems of their own and I don’t want to burden others. I’ve been freaked out by my lack of emotion for a while as I have previously been very empathetic to the emotions of those around me. Recently I’ve begun masking my feelings(or lack thereof) from those around me as I don’t want to worry them. This has led to several of my friends approaching me asking to talk about their own feelings of depression and in my mind I’m really worried about some of them but I can’t bring myself to feel it. Today one of these friends approached me and told me that they were feeling a lack of emotional recently and thought they might have depression. I’ve just been dealing with my lack of emotion but it has honestly sucked and I wouldn’t want anyone especially not one of my closest friends to have to experience that. In my mind I know what I should be feeling but I just can’t seem to feel it so I’ve been faking it. Honestly I don’t know how to help or what to say to my friend. He has always been there for me on the occasion that I did approach him with something I was struggling with and I want nothing more than to be there for him, I just can’t find the emotion or even the words. I feel so useless like I’m failing him and letting him down when he needs me. It’s been a day
@diplomaticPrune4856 you can't pour from an empty cup. You have to feel good in order to help someone else. Don't beat yourself up. You have your limits. Maybe your friend will understand like most people do - that not everyone has solutions to their problems. Perhaps they are not even expecting from you things you maybe making yourself guilty about. I think be honest about how you feel and share with your friend that you're feeling equally vulnerable if not more. Even letting them know that you care inspite of your own problems -- may resonate with them and bring them a sense of comfort.
maybe the relationship with my parents, they are people that are not emotionally intelligent, they don't listen, i try to explain what i feel but Always treat me like a kid and I feel like every Word i Say Is Just trash, that every Word has no meaning.
The also tell all ours problems at ny grandma and they also think that everyone what I Say it's fault of my boyfriend or a friend. They can't Understand that i'm a smart persone Who can think alone , no One tells me anything.
The most struggle? Living accepting that they Will never Heard you and you Will NEVER feel heard by them.
@loveandhealthlistener17 I feel ya. I don't know why parents tend to get like this.. being younger doesn't mean one lacks intelligence...in fact parents who value their children's input end up acknowledging that they have learnt from their kids as much as they have taught to their kids. Without the support of parental validation, building confidence and achieving goals becomes very difficult .. nonetheless we have to try doing what's best for us in the circumstances we are born with.
@Creamyyy the most painful aspect in my life is my self sabotage. I never allow myself to be happy and causes me to seek validation from men and then end up having sex and then feel disgusting and sit in self hate all day. I wish I could allow myself to be happy for once.
@Lovexoxo17 from my perspective using sexual pleasure to solve emotional problems is a misguided idea. The need for love is understandable... but a sexual connection may not be the answer. Why don't you invest your time in some friendships or casual conversations with people that can give you confidence....
@Creamyyy Hello there, thank you for raising this topic. Right now there is a lot of things happening at the same time in life for me, which is a little overwhelming. But I would have to say the fear of losing someone, or losing some opportunity to change my life, is giving me the most pain. I guess I tend to be anxious overall in life, because of that fear. It's a cliche, but I think regarding people, I have abandonment issues, whereas regarding career or self-development, I have self-esteem issues. They triggered my fear, and then give me the most pain
@peacestorm1115 I can relate. Fear can have a grip on us .... we imagine what-if scenarios that may not ever happen... it's good to remind yourself that the things you are imagining are only thoughts and no one knows what the future holds for you.
Another thing that has helped me is to face my fear... okay let's say what if the worst I'm imagining does come true... it does scare you at first but gradually by thinking it over and sharing with othere you feel a sense of release. We have the strength in us to face our challenges... we just don't realise how strong and resilient we are. Even if we break, human spirit allows us to kick back in.
You can do this ❤️
The powerlessness I feel to meaningfully solve problems and take risks. Fear, anxiety, depression at the state of things. The normalization of the worst human actions sets a dangerous precedent for the future of all humanity. All that's left is to effectively dehumanize any given group and the unthinkable becomes okay.
@Zeraphim
It's time people took an honest look at themselves and asked: what is right and just? There is an epidemic of moral failing. It's a tragedy. But there is hope, we just have to use logic and reasoning together to figure things out. It's going to take collaboration, time and patience.
@Zeraphim I feel a sense of powerlessness too -- and perhaps we all do -- we can see what is wrong but we lack solutions... I feel starting in baby steps is a good idea. Every little action counts. We may not bring a huge change all by ourselves but each of us can do something valuable to contribute to the overall justice quest. Even if it's a prayer or an objective analysis or support to the right organisation etc.
