Support Protocol on Dissociative Behavior in Group Support Rooms

im drowning with the DID rules and no one is here to save me anymore ill come back when the rules are fixed

As per 7Cups guidelines, you're supposed to give everyone with DID, OSDD, and DDNOS the same respect and treatment you give to other users. 7Cups is supposed to help support pretty much anyone no matter the person's problem. That's discrimination towards pretty much anyone with dissociative disorders such as ourselves. It's not fair for those who've DID to ONLY stay in PM's. While as people who've dealt and/or self-harm ideation can still be chatted about in group support. Your L may not always be there for you when you need it. Would we members want to be just relying on one person? That person has a life too. Also on the Browse Listeners page there is no Dissociative and Personality disorders section. This is vague. Talking about DID like that is not nice considering so many other similar disorders.

Even when admin implimented a safety measure in PM'ing L's as "newbie" members, that was never clarified either. Just pretty much says you can't and it makes members upset. Also vague post.

We systems would like to be treated equally as you would treat any real, living, and breathing human being.

"Treat everyone the way how you'd like to be treated."

@ASilentObserver @Hope @Heather225 @EvelyneRose @SoulfullyAButterfly

(*No need to read this post if you don't will to as I think it is considered long for many people.. just another being typing here like anyone else."♡")
Hello fellow Members / Listeners... Seems like there's some sort of a Revoltion here On-Line regarding a missunderstood and stigmatized Mental-Health Topic. I see that there's a lot of confusion and outrage from this Thread.. and here's what I got from it and opinion.
First of all.. Thank-You Hope [And who helped along.] For taking time for hearing others thoughts in Posts / Comments before.. but can you probably try to take more time to post something more clear and diligent..?
So far I understood that you all were trying make the Rooms a safe space for everyone to speak thier mind and say what's been trapped in thier chest.. but that doesn't mean that 'Everyone' doesn't include a group of hurt people.. and they may even be new to thier issue and habe no control over.. and banning them isn't
apporative. .. by that you're just adding more of that intolerable pain of loneliness to them. Even if the Members are struggling with with Dissociative-Disorders (DID / MPD, OSDD Depersonalization / Derealization ~etc~.) They just like anyone else in here.. looking for Support for thier Issues / Problems and be heard.. Add to that these people suffer from daily discrimination, missunderstandings, offensive comments, ~etc~ as thier concomitant is still until today stigmatized globally...[Unfortunately...]
This must have been a total flabbergast here for many people here.. espiacially that as I noticed many people who struggle with this problem seem to prefer the Group-Rooms.. which means they felt that they were actually heard and belong somewhere away from this judgemental Society we live in.. It is quite empowering and encouraging to be listened and interact with others who try to live along strong with what they have... and get rid of this unbearable thought:"I must be the only one...~"... And also refering them to connect with a Listener may not do any good. Like imagine that you refered an emotionally drained person to that.. then they encounter one of these 'Magnificent Listeners'(a.k.a Bullies) won't it get worse?
What about those who are in Crisis? Just like anyone else you can refer them to thier Country's Crisis-Resources if available.
I've been in this Site / App for a few years now.. I saw all the bitterness and sweetness about it during these times.. nothing in this World is 'Perfect' I understand. But seems like the this here are going downhill.. and this giving a huge impact to the Community.. not even thus but it would cause to lose more people. People who came here to make difference.. to help.. to support.. to make a better change in thier life..~ This is not help even a little.. it upsetting for the majority of the people here. [It yields more harm then good.]
When we rethink back then when 7-Cups was founded.. It was considered to be a would-be worldwide, On-Line philanthropic place for everyone to seek Support / Help, right? So why would we are making distinctions between us and other people? Aren't they people too? Sometimes I wonder why discrimination even exists within people.. aren't we from the very same origin? Even if not, is that how you would treat your guests?
We are all were born different from each other, with our own destiny even twins/triplets/quadruplets are different.. this what makes us different then other beings and gives life various colours. What we struggle with doesn't define us; we're still people that have every right to live like anyone else.. worthy of being heard and cared for.

I had an expressional imagery before that may be more understandable... :
Once there was a Country.. newly founded and in the road of growth and prosper. The Goverment (Let's say these are the Leaders.) knowledged how to make thier Home Country grow and progress.. they listened to the People (These are the Members / Listeners.) and worked hard to build the Country in stable terms. After some amount of time passed.. all the hard work seems to be fructuous.. there were some bumps in the way but it still paid off the work. The People of the Country lived in harmony and safety. As times has changed the state seems to change slowly down.. and it reached to the point were a community of People (Those are who are struggling with this issue here.)
Are declared to have thier interactions and works and supports limited.. it angered the People as many of them liked to go to these places.. and they have voiced thier thoughts upon this Problem.. but were given a outragious response from thier Government. So these People decided to do it with force and go out in protests to declare thier fellow community rights.. they went out with the Community's famous mark printed in flags (These are going to be what I see the Members here have similar Profile-Pictures.) And protested.. as the silence of thier Government continued it made the situation exacerbate.. and the fundamentals of thier state became more adynamic by each day passing.. and the Government continued to reinforce the Rules even in other Topics.. and the People considered them as unfair and clear tyranny.. ◇it turned into a Civil-War.. and vitiation spread.. and the Country no longer seemed to be safe so People began to leave the Country to live in safer places abroad. In the end.. the Country was officially declared as a Failed-State (A term used which refer when a the Government fails to keep the law over Country's People.) It was no long the homely place it's People new in the Past...[From the '◇' mark that's what haven't happened here yet... and I hope it doesn't happen.]
Expressionly... This what could happen to 7-Cups if the People here never feel heard and safe anymore... which is the main porpuse for this Community. I believe it can improve to the better.. but not this way.

I don't mean to offense anyone... All I meant is that the People here should be n but I think my mentality sides more with one from my typings here. ":')".[Sorry for any Mistakes / Missunderstandings
I wish this would be solved as soon as possible(ASAP).

I noticed that people here are bound to tag some others... but I am not sure if I am really considered a friend to anyone here.. Can't type out ones.

Try to Take-Care and Stay-Safe."♡"

https://ibb.co/Tr55fGY

@Hope and @Glen

Four days have passed since the update. Several people have raised new concerns and expressed feeling confused and hurt. The silence they have been met with is heart-breaking.

Silence is golden, they say. And it definitely is when it protects a relationship by deescalating a difficult situation. I wonder if this is what you are trying to do. I am not sure though. Despite their pain, disappointment and anger, people have written posts that still sound respectful. Their request for clarity is legitimate.

When does silence become abusive? Maybe when it is harmful? I really do not know.

Below are my own personal questions about the updated protocol and its meaning and implications.

1. The original DID protocol was said to address the alters' age issue. There are tools that some mods were already using with success. These could have been promoted. It is unclear why this was not the chosen solution. I think it would help to get some clarification as to why.

2. The current update is now addressing many more people under the label 'dissociative behaviours'. This includes people who experience dissociation without necessarily having alters. It is unclear the relation with the age issue now. It was already a bit unclear before honestly: where is the issue if, for instance, an adult alter is interacting in an adult group room? I think it would help to get some clarification on what exactly the protocol is trying to ‘fix.

3. Dissociative behaviours in group rooms are said to be taking away from the therapeutic environment: it is unclear what exactly they are taking away and how so. Some clarification on this would be extremely welcome. I personally find such a description quite insulting, to be honest.

4. Speaking from my role as CML in the Personality Disorders Support subcom. As you know, dissociative symptoms can be found in people suffering from a personality disorder. It is unclear if people who suffer from a PD and have dissociative symptoms can still use the group rooms or not. It is unclear if the protocol means that people cannot go into a room when (and only when) they are experiencing dissociation. For your consideration: people are not always aware of being in a dissociative state.

5. How do you intend mods to concretely act when someone who has DID or experience dissociation in other forms enters a room? What if the condition was made known to the mod in a 1-1 setting? Have you considered the impact this is going to have on people that already feel stigmatised for who they are?

I also think it would be nice to have the original post back as well, along with the current update and possible future ones. It may help people to reconstruct what happened. Transparency cannot harm, can it?

Thank you if you took the time to read this.

@Hope

I took some time before responding. The Disability Support community values inclusivity. We have members who are living with DID and they have been an important part of the community. Some have been here for years. Conceptually, I think the first post was looking at it from the point of view that a person living with DID was coming to the site for the first time. Perhaps referring them to the DID community seemed appropriate for a first time visitor. When a member has been here already for years, and with no conflicts and no incidents, it seems counterintuitive to ask them to leave based only on a diagnosis. I have no way to verify a diagnosis, so enforcing such a rule would prove challenging. And the wording in the original post never specifically said we should ask anyone to leave but that we should "refer" them to the DID community. This is open to interpretation, it could mean I mention to them that the DID community exists.

The updated post seems to suggest that we will use the behavioral point system. So I take this to mean that if we are not having any problems with behavior then we do not need to take any actions.

I read this "an online group support chat room not specifically aimed at DID is not the most fitting form of support". I need to be very clear. We have been offering support for DID in a group support chat room in the Disability Community for YEARS. We have not had any problems. The Disability Support Group Chat would like to continue to offer this support as we have always done. I would like to reach out to the team of clinical experts to create a dialogue regarding any suggestions about how we can improve the support we already provide. I would be open to having guided discussions relating to DID. Perhaps the clinical experts would like to make other suggestions, as well.

The bottom line for me is that I would like to aim for excellence, and not shy away from difficult issues like DID. A person living with DID is, after all. a person. I am no expert, and I do not have specialized training, but it seems to me that DID is about trauma. The support should be about kindness. We listen and we do not give advice. But more than that, we care! It is also about love! We support each other so that no member should have to go through it alone.

Isn't this the vision that started 7cups? Perhaps the support is working and you had not realized it. We should be celebrating this as a victory, a remarkable victory.

in the spirit of love,

BlindGrapefruit, Community Mentor in Disability Support

Hi everyone, we have been reading the feedback provided by all of you on this post. It appears that there has been confusion. There also are some more questions raised. We are closing this post and starting a new post here with the goal of decreasing confusion and making the conversation more effective. Thank you for your input.