Support Room 24/7: Let's make it better
Hello everyone, I hope everyone is doing well.
Earlier today around 12.00 AM Eastern, we had a group chat room meeting on the adult side which was productive. I appreciate all who joined, participated, and shared their valuable inputs with me. I am grateful to you all for keeping the chat rooms safe, supportive and compassionate space for everyone.
However, there were few concerns that were brought up during the meeting.
- The purpose of the Support room isn’t clear.
It was brought to my attention that our new members who join the support room 24/7 are unaware of what this specific room is all about. It is understandable that they might not know. So, here I need all help in spreading awareness among them. Whenever a new member comes into the room, you could send this message or a similar one to them, so they know what the support room 24/7 is and how to participate in it.
Message Template that you could use:
“Hello (Username), Welcome to 7Cups. You’re in the Support Room 24/7 right now. It is a general support room where you can share how you are feeling, what’s in your mind, your thoughts, experiences, etc. Please focus on your emotions while sharing. We are here to listen and support you. You are not alone. Also, you could check out and bookmark this small resource: https://tinyurl.com/4hb5sj6e How are you doing?”
- Cliques exist. Improve the inclusivity
Another concern that was brought up during the meeting was cliques existing. It means some members feeling ignored or unheard while some members are listened to and supported. We understand that it is a busy room and when more than two or three people are sharing their thoughts, it is difficult to keep up with the conversation and in the process, some may feel ignored or rejected.
So considering it here is an idea that I want to share and you all please chime in. How about during busy hours, when the room is full or any time, we form a queue where two sharers can share at a time for 10 minutes and after 10 minutes, the next two sharers can share their thoughts.
It will help all members and listeners to listen, acknowledge and validate each other and support better. This idea has some downsides too which I understand and this is why I think if we could just trial and see how it goes.
As well as all are welcome to bring more ideas and suggestions to improve the Support Room 24/7 for all. Here is a post on inclusivity that you may find helpful too: https://tinyurl.com/sc6vwyz2
- Some shares are triggering
It was also shared that sometimes some members share their thoughts or experiences that could be triggering to other members in the chatroom. For this situation, I want to suggest two things to us to follow!
- Firstly, the sharer should use “Trigger Warning” ahead of his share so members present in the room know that contents of the share could be triggering in nature. It is recommended to the sharer to focus on his emotions during the share instead of focusing on graphical contents.
- Secondly, any member who is feeling triggered, please step out of the room for the time being and switch to another chat room or any other space that you find comfortable. It will help you avoid the situation which could potentially trigger you and take care of yourself. You are welcome to rejoin the specific room after a while.
Here are general guidelines for triggering shares for general and specific chat rooms: https://tinyurl.com/hb827mms
- Some chatroom guidelines are unclear
Another concern that was discussed that unclear rules are hard to enforce. It is understandable how it could be hard and lead to inconsistency of following it in the chat rooms. So, I invite you all to share which one chatroom rule you feel is unclear to you. Please let us know in the comments of this thread. And then we could create a doc to explain all those rules in detail as well as host some discussions on this topic so we all have a better understanding of the chatroom guidelines. It will help us enforce these rules as a group better.
I invite you all to share your thoughts and inputs too, so we all could join together to improve Support Room 24/7 for everyone. You are part of the group support chat rooms and we invite you to join and share your thoughts with us. You are not alone! We are all on this support journey together.
I feel like the purpose of member community room isn't clear either and that that room is being used as the support room. Perhaps renaming the mcr or adding "casual chat" to the name would clear up this issue.
Thanks for discussing this :)
@ASilentObserver
Maybe having a short pop-up description appear on a users screen when they enter the room, describing what the room is for and how to participate would be a good idea?
Yes I highly agree!
@ASilentObserver thanks for the reminder obs!
What seems not obvious is, what are "passive religious and political talks"? It was a rule for "current events room". The word passive is not clear in this context.
@kindSoul10 I maybe wrong here,so if I am, someone please correct me.
Passive may mean off the wall religious talk, that has no bases for it.
In other words, it may not be a good idea to talk about it,in the chatrooms.
If that makes any sence, my friend @KindSoul10.
That is my take on what it means.
@OBS If I spoke out of turn,I am sorry.
I was just trying to help @KindSoul10, out.
@Happy900 thanks, that might be. We don't know for sure. In general chatroom rules say to not talk about religion or politics. The stress on "passive" leaves room for interpretation and it would be nice to have more clarification within the rules text.
@kindSoul10
@kindSoul10
*high fives* my friend I think you are seeing it all. How these topics affect all areas of the site! You are clearly sitting back and seeing the global picture! rock on Funny Bunny, rock on! 
@SparkyGizmo thank you! I do my best! ❤️
You rock too!
@kindSoul10
I really have to say, just simply hearing your question, you are sooooo aware, you are so plugged in, it's what I have in the past called "follow the bubble" for some of the work that I have done. You see the "bubble" and now you are "following the bubble" from place to place, you are seeing the bubble in all of the nooks and crannies here on 7 cups! The "bubble" does bounce around, now doesn't it? For me, this is a great moment to have sat back and watched someone connect all of the dots. You have connected the dots and you are doing so with a sharpie marker, in big and bold lines. *bows in front of greatness* That was impressive my friend! I give you not only the *high fives* for that one, but the *high kick* Yup, you my friend are the very first recipient on this site to ever recieve the *high kick* wooooooo hooooooooooo!
And btw, I don't have a personal problem with that "bubble", in fact I embrace that "bubble" but I embrace the "bubble" of others as well, but, it's a hot topic and not everyone feels that way and so indeed, this is where conflict can ensue.
@SparkyGizmo kindsoul10, first of funny bunny and proud recipient of the (sparkling) high kick. ヾ(*’Ｏ’*)/ I feel knighted. Thank you, I'm treasuring your kindness and your high kick in my heart. 😊
@kindSoul10
Amazing how things come full circle? big *hugs* Thank you for being the first one that really believed in me, spent time with me, and you were the first to give me those words of encouragement. I wear that "funny bunny" badge proudly and one that I wear on my heart and I'm so happy that you will now wear the "high kick" badge proudly! it's a great place to work hard and play hard too. It's great to encourage others around here! and that..........is what makes the magic happen
Thank you for taking steps to clarify the purpose of these support rooms! I agree in that I believe members aren't aware of the differences in the two rooms and what each rooms is intended for. Cliques definitely exists, as ’regulars’ use the 24/7 as a hang out room. It can be difficult to be supportive of someone who is wanting to discuss a situation that is upsetting to them while others are discussing movies. When asked to move to the MCR, members can get upset and start a rant about Mods (etc. etc). I also agree that perhaps a name change for MCR could indicte that it is the proper room to use for random topics or when people are bored and just want to hang out. A suggestion that I would like to propose: the massages that appear in the background of a room, could these be customized for 24/7? They could read something similar to "Looking for a place for a light hearted chat? Head over to MCR” or similar to ”Want to share how you're feeling? Press * and we'll add you to the queue to share what's on your mind" Those are just a few examples of messages that could appear in the background of the room. Again, thank you for starting this dialogue!! Sher
@Sher217
I think you brought up a good point and even using the * to start modeling some rooms after the sharing circles. I cannot speak as to how the member sharing circles go typically as I've only been there a few times. But, in my personal opinion, the listener sharing circles usually work like a well oiled machine. We have hosts there that have a true commitment to quality, they know how to address certain issues if they come up. These hosts really know what they are doing but I am uncertain if 7 cups can provide that sort of interaction constantly for each and every room. I think that could potentially go into the realm of an impossibility. Oh well, at least if you reach for the stars you don't end up with mud in your hand, lol.
I know it's unfortunate that everyone wants to get angry with a "mod" whether they be in any form. But people want, what they want, when they want it. People do not like being told "no" even if it is formed in a way as to not say the actual word "no". I see a lot of these mods around here as quite stellar, incredibly impressive and really really good at what they do. It's truly their job to maintain the rooms to be inclusive, warm, supportive and encouraging to all users on the site. I have seen this in action time and time again and it can be done and for me, knowing some mods are in the room simply brings me peace, comfort, feelings of safety and that everything is truly going to work out okay, because they are in control . Each mod is different, and sometimes their way of maintaining the control, is to gently encourage, plant the seed and hope the user will ultimately come to the resolution for themselves and do the right thing and stop. I have to trust in that process as well and I understand that I am not privy to everything that goes on behind the scenes and nor should I at this point in the process.
But even then, people don't like to be told "no" that their behavior is inappropriate for a certain room. Perhaps not every mod can pull this off with style and finese and with a great deal of kindness. So, who knows, maybe that could be a problem with some interactions. But we still need to respect the badge even if people become angry and have a difficulty respecting the person behind the badge. These things happen I guess from time to time. If I'm in a room and I don't have confidence in the mod (for whatever reason), I become most quiet or simply leave
@ASilentObserver
So efficient and quick , Yayy Obzieee !! You're amazing !
Thankyou for hosting the meeting today and for hearing out everyone and doing this follow up post with relevant suggestions being invited from the community too .
I hope together all of us could bring about some change 😊❤
@ASilentObserver (and everyone else ^^ )
I might want to add that I find the practice of encouraging people to just add a trigger warning to their descriptions problematic. Because people entering after the trigger warning has been posted dont see it. And walk full in on something they might not want to be confronted with. Newcomers might also not even know what "TW" or "trigger warning" stands for. And I have seen posting "TW" in front of something and / or posting "TW" and then linking pictures of self harm or other very controversial and on the whole upsetting things, essentially abusing the idea of it. I am a bit worried that encouraging people to use TW will lead to more unpleasant situations that dont need to happen.
A general idea for rooms that rely on specific rituals or patterns of communication and behaviour: What about putting a pop up window at the entrance. So whenever someone enters the sharing circle room for the first time that day for example, a window pops up and explains the general conduct and procedure of the room. That way, people would know right form the start how the system works, would not feel disregarded or told off and like they are disrupting anything simply because they dont know how the room works. It would make for a more flowing chatroom expereince as well as mods or hosts dont need to explain the system of the room to each newbie or firstcomer.
Overall I have to say i think it is very positive and nice that the thread here exists and that there seems to be a collective effort thats being made on improving the experience and support for each member and listener as well as mod in the rooms.
Love & all the best
Moky
thank you thank you SO much for this! inclusivity is very important ✨
I am glad this is here because as a newbie, I am still exploring 7 Cups. However, there was a meeting last night about the chat rooms and today I realized exactly what they were talking about. I just visited a few minutes ago, I guess Supprt Chat Room. I saw that someone wanted to share their thoughts and wanted no interruptions. They seemed aggitated by the writing. Well, during this persons share, they are immediately cut off before they were finished and I do agree that the person who was sharing was definitely rushed off. I saw that the person who was sharing was also attacked by another newbie who was also aggitated. I feel that whenever something like that happens: If a person says they felt rushed, they deeply felt rushed. Don't invalidate them saying they weren't. I think whoever is running the room should be more concerning and responsive to the person who seems upset. At least apologize for any misunderstandings. All it takes is one person to make the room feel uncomfortable and someone should kindly bring the room back to a good vibe. Other than that, I really find 7 Cups to be beneficial to me.
Correction, it was the Sharing Circle I was in but regardless of which room, no one should feel like what they are saying isn't valid or like they aren't being heard. Every person should feel like they matter and that their voices do matter.
@DaisyBeeBlooming What a profound statement,my friend.
@ASilentObserver
Hello Obs 💖
I like the ideas and explanations posted in here and I agree them most. I know SR is supposed to help people in need for support. However, I would like to ask if this thread applies only to SR in the adult side, since I (and some other members I've talked to) have some suggestions for SR in teen side. I've seen certain situations there that make difficult to listen and to help others and I'd like to express my concern about it. Thank you 😊
With all due respect, too much structure in a group chat room will defeat the purpose. I might as well use a forum or go to the sharing circle for instance if I want to share something and have the full attention of all users in that group. I think we should be able to vent or talk about our issues as we please. If that means that there are two support group chat rooms (if one is too busy to keep up with so we go to the other room), then that’s fine. But even when there are “check ins” in these group chats, I find them really annoying, because it should be an open space to talk or not talk to whoever. And of course, if something is triggering, then there should be a disclaimer.