I jst hate my past self.
this ain't even going to be long. I jst want to forget what happened. I hate who I was before. I hate the guilt. It's the worst emotion ever, imo, at least. idk, but I would really like to somehow forgive my past self. I didn't know better, but I should have.
anyways I HOPE YALL HAVE A NICE DAYYY!!
you're right I guess. thank you, like sincerely. I needed that
@alinewren You're not alone 🤍 I have similar feelings, we'll get through this ❤️ You're Awesome <3 Sending lots of love and best wishes towards you! 🐾❤️
thank you sooooo muchh!!! I rlly rlly appreciate it. Seriously
best wishes to you tooooo!💫
@alinawren I feel your conflict of emotions.. but your anger at yourself is reflective of your reformed heart and thats victory . Be at peace. 💛
you guys r really making me feel better omg I didn't expect this at all but thank you soo much! you're right:)
@alinawren growing up is basically just becoming a matryoshka doll of self hate and cringe, when you keep looking back at your past self and facepalming, just for a few years older you facepalming later when thinking back at the one facepalming over the past version now 😂 I know it is an unpleasant feeling, but don't worry. You are not alone ❤️ in fact I'm pretty sure almost everyone experiences it to various extent.
On a more serious note, past you did what it could with the information and skills it had at the time. I see your profile says teen for age, so you really don't have a lot of life experience to be this hard on yourself. You are growing and learning every day. And who you were maybe isn't something you look back with love, and that's ok. You learn and grow every day and do the best you can with what you have. That's okay. Don't beat yourself up over it, *** happens. Use the bad parts to grow as a person, talk through them on therapy if needed or bring it up to a trusted adult. Genuinely, you would not believe how much wild crap most of us did that you have no idea about that still keeps us staring at the ceiling at night. You got this! 😊
that helped a lot. Thank you, sincerely:) I jst wishh I could change what happened tho but *** you're right. I did what I thought was best.
tyssssm again u have a nice day alrrr!!
@alinawren don't worry. You are not alone in feeling how you do ❤️ past you tried it's best ❤️
I totally agree with you. I too hate my old self. Despite fact I really wasnt a bad person except within my home. I had my 2 very young children and my mom however on the outside I had who later became My ex. Between being abused by him and prior to him being abused by my step father I ended up being my sons abuser but not my daughter. I hate having hurt my don’t as I did. We rarely connect but I guess God thing is we haven’t lost full connection with each other we don’t verbally speak on the phone but he will text me snd I’ll text him. He will acknowledge me on holidays and birthdays but it still hurts. I want to make amends to him but I guess I’ve gutted him so much that he doesn’t want to connect further in fear I’ll do it again. It totally rips my heart to pieces. I never intended to hurt him. I just didnt realize that 1. It was abuse. Being already abused for so many years I thought everyone lived like I did. I lived a very sheltered life never had even 1 person I could call a friend. Was never slowed to go out except for school snd with my mom or step father. I just had no idea 2. I also had no idea that the emotion I was feeling during the time of myhim was literally the reborn of being sngry. I just didn’t know when I should have known and most importantly I knew what it felt like to me ehen I got accused. I should have known better not to do it to him. I cab in any regard feel lucky that Seth I hit him I didn’t do it severe that it ended his life. I would hit hard 3-4 times then stop. My worst was the verbal abuse I did to him. I’ve apologized so many times to him over the years he just won’t allow me to make amends and to show him how very deeply I love and admire him as well as how honored and blessed I am to call him my son i need stop worrying this post at this point as the years just came flowing down. All I can ask myself is ehy why did I do this to someone I truly love and still do love.
I mean, I feel that. Abusing someone is never okay. But the fact that you're feeling guilty about it is enough punishment. For beating yourself up forever because of who you were in the past is not going to benefit you any further. I know I'm saying all of this and not even doing *** correctly myself, and I'm not even as experienced in life as you are, obviously, but what I'm saying is in a 3rd perspective, so please trust me to stop beating yourself up. I'm in NO POSITION to be giving these kind of advice because i still dont fully 100% forgive my past self, yet, but I'm telling the advice I know I'd love to hear.
afterall, someone told me past you is different from who you are right now:) Which is completelyy true. You were the person that you were capable of being, good or bad. Again, abusing ppl is never okay, but you were hurt soo much from what I've come to understand. So cut yourself some slack alright:) You're human, and humans can make mistakes. However big or small. What's important is the person we become after those mistakes. You've owned up to yours, enough. Now stop beating yourself up :)
@alinawren i understand what you mean by that. there are just too many regrets, so many things we wished we hadn't done / had done, just a little too many missed opportunities. but I also like to believe the past is the reason you are who you are today, you know? the reason we get to be kind, empathetic and sweet is because we learnt from our mistakes, its because we needed that consequence to hit so we can understand. you may never be able to forgive your past, but maybe focussing on the present is the way to go?
we can never change the past, people might still remember us as we used to be. but now you have the chance to change it, to treat people better, treat yourself better. i think being aware of our past is crucial, but you don't need to let it weigh you down to remember.
you're right you're right:)
I'll def try. Thank you, sincerely
@alinawren of course!! hope you have a wonderful journey ahead haha
you toooo!
I’ve done so many bad things before (according to my family) and the worst part is being defined by thoes things like ppl cannot change
@alinawren
Welcome to seven cups and it's nice to meet you 💜🥰 Its hard when the person we once were doesnt exist anymore, but people dont let us forget that. We cannot live in the past, we take accountability from it, we learn from it, we move on from it, it can be hard when weve done things or hurt people, but we need to forgive ourselves in order to heal, self growth comes from accepting and not diminishing. I truly wish you the best, don't waste time looking back, be the best version of yourself that you can be today, all you can do is your best. We won't always be everyone's cup of tea and even some people's opinions of us will never change, but that's fine, it's your opinion that counts 💜🥰
you're right. Thank you so muchh!
Well. Without any kind of clues about what your past was about, i can't really relate. What i can say though is that i'm in a situation where i'm suffering because of my past. A past where i was a kid that thought that doing the right thing is a good thing, so i never did anything for myself, never studied for myself, never made friends, never did anything, just what my parents thought is alright, and over time i became lonely and pointless, because school ended, college ended, and now i'm having a lame job and nothing to do with the money. So, what even is the point? I don't even know how to talk to people face to face without feeling weird or getting philosophical. I don't care about what the average guy or person of my age cares. I'm just... weird... unapproachable... and this keeps me from approaching people, so now i'm just lonely... and i'm blaming my past because of it... i hope it never happened. I hope i never happened...
I'm sorry to hear that. I mean, im def not as experienced in life as u are but i know one thing is that you can't change who you were before. You did what past you thought was best. Now you're different though. You don't think like that anymore. So why hold on to it? That ain't you. Humans evolve, we make mistakes. it's not about getting rid of your problems, the only way you could do that through death. but it's who you become after solving your problem that matters. Don't die when you can start living a conpletelyyy different life:)
and please don't blame your past self. Again, you did what you thought was best. Now you do what you think is best too. GOOD LUCK I BELIEVE IN YOU!
Guilt and regret was about killing me. Mainly as a parent. My daughter is a miracle I waited for until close to 40 years old she finally got here after a prophecy of her arrival. We have been through so much. I love her so much. I made so many mistakes i cant take back for me that has been my main breaking point for guilt and regret
I prayed a lot and felt stuck. I then found the reconnected a place for parents that truly offers amazing help and ideas unlike most places offer. Then I discovered Insight Timer app bcs I needed more work and change inside od myself. Healing. I felt there is no way I could let it go thr regret and guilt. But ... You can.. we can.
Healing is a process but we have to start somewhere. Have you ever tried breath work guided sessions on a regular basis ? The refresh and reset challenge in Insight timer has been helping me a lot and I use many courses there. If you're curious you'll find amazing avenues. Dig a bit.
You can find specific courses for regret. Some are way better than others that is why it's good to mess around until.you find the ones that hit home for you. Keep a journal with you and let the healing begin.
At first just like any exercise we wonder if we are getting results but as we continue out craft..it becomes perfected and all the benefits unravel before us and within us.
Sending love to you today. You're wonderful and able.
