What's difference between supportive chatter and cliques chatter?
Cliques chatter is when certain members of a group talk among themselves and exclude others.
Sad, is it not?!
Let's consider an offline situation. You were a group of friends sitting and chattering. Then, a new friend came and said 'may I join you all' and you welcome them with kindheartedness, and not only that, help them break ice with you and make them feel comfortable in the group!
Now, that, is supportive chatter. The chatter which is welcoming and inclusive of those wanting to join in!
Dear Community, let's today discuss more thoughts about this important topic: about the problem of cliques in the community and on overcoming it!
Please share your thoughts below.
Let's together form an inclusive globe!
The discussion is presented to you by the Living with Leaders Program! In the Living with Leaders, we learn from one another in the community. Click here to get involved further.
Supportive Chatter includes all and being supportive to everyone whether they know or not.
Clique chatter only chat and supportive with those whom they already know.
@CoffeeBeans3 how succinctly put!
@Fristo Thank you for this very important post and it was very helpful to me.
@Fristo
I think cliques form due to people hoping for safety after being hurt how a turtle goes into their shell at the sign of danger.
Understanding why someone may be behaving this way without taking it personally can help one stay calm.
Having personal principles and values are also helpful because they form a guide to one's life.
In the Growth Path regarding time management it goes over priorities, principles and values.
@Dallady oh my, i always love the turtle analogy! we go back into the shell of our wisdom and understanding when it feels unsafe.
@Dallady
Hi Dallady! 😊❤️ I loved hearing your thoughts and I think you phrased this quite well! This did resonate with me as I feel like what you are saying is "once bitten, twice shy". I have loved seeing your work here on the platform in the forum areas. I find you to be quite wise as well as incredibly kind. ❤️
I feel as if you are "leaning in" to another way of enlightening us, that its not being mean spirited, it's not shunning or intentionally leaving another out but if we are mistreated as people on the platform by others, well, in the effort of self preservation, sometimes less interaction is best!
7 cups even asks us to do this. Ta-dah! We are asked to interact less with instigators, use our personal mute buttons and even leave the room if someone is there that makes us feel uncomfortable. So of course, in those situations we would all gravitate to others that are kind, trustworthy and have our best interests at heart! ❤️
*high fives* 😊 and big *hugs* ❤️
While it is nice to want to chat with our friends and there is nothing wrong with wanting to do so, we need to make sure that we are not excluding others. At the end of the day, EVERY person that enters a room deserves to be acknowledged, supported, and heard. Saying hello and making chit chat or even putting a sweet emoji are ways to do that. Also, we need to welcome and acknowledge new people because that's how we meet new amazing people! How else do you meet potential friends if you are busy excluding others? We do not have to "like" everyone. That's ok, but we need to respect everyone! And everyone is worth a 👋. ♡ Just my two cents. :)
@YourCaringConfidant desiree, those are so many cents. i feel rich.
@YourCaringConfidant
Wow! Brilliant! ❤️ Well said my wonderful Caring, well said! 😊❤️😊 I second that! If anyone wants to see what community building and relationship building looks like, in action, feel free to watch Caring being "the example" of this! Watch and learn folks, watch and learn!
*high fives* 😊 big *hugs* ❤️ and keep rockin' the house you amazing human! Weeeeeeeee weeeeeee! 😊
@SparkyGizmo Awwww, you are the best Sparky ever! Huggggs!!!! 🤗 ❤
@YourCaringConfidant
❤️❤️❤️
@Fristo I have not noticed cliques chatter on 7cups, but now that you bring it up, I will watch out for it.
@Fristo
You've nicely differentiated chatters which feel comfortable to newcomers from those groups which focus on the people already present in the group.
One way to create a supportive chatter is to always welcome anyone entering the group- a small step goes a long way 🤗❤️
@charmingFlower8111 Love it! "A small step goes a long way." As you said, that is soooo true! Sometimes just that genuine hello :) is the highlight of people's day. ♡
@Fristo I agree with what you are saying. I would like to add, it can lead to conflicts, in the chatrooms, if you exclude others, so it is best to include everyone as much as you can, and also I find that it makes others feel, like there voices matter, and there problems, or what was bothering them, lessens, and also I feel they gain insight, and have a better understanding of what others are going through. I know, that when I have days I am struggling, and we all feel sorry for ourselves, we all do that, I am guilty of doing this from time to time, that there are people, who have it worse then you, and it makes you stop and think. I know it does me.
@Fristo, I have noticed some cliche chatter and it does make me feel even more isolated that I did coming in, sometimes. But, I do understand how it can happen. So, everyone please be more mindful.
*clique
@Fristo
Cliques chatter is something everyone has done. I will admit I have done it and after realizing what I did was hurtful I made amends to them. It is not supportive as it is easy to say "we're here for each other and support each other" when in truth it just words with no action behind it. I dealt with the negative part of it and I will say it hard to know if it a form of self protection or lack of empathy (maybe both) but supportive chatter is much better as it makes you feel welcomed and less neglectful.
@Fristo I was actually not aware of this subject until it was brought up in the positivity room. I guess sometimes the rooms get so busy it's hard to answer everyone. And maybe you get a bit carried away in a conversation. When this was brought up, I remember I apologised to everyone in the room straight away. Just incase I had ever left someone out unknowingly.
Cliques chatter makes others feel outside. Online is no different than in person. Being inclusive is welcoming and everyone loves to be included! 💕💕💕
Friends are different than cliques in my opinion! Because of past history it is awesome to reconnect with a friend even in a group chat. You can be friends with others and be welcoming and inclusive without being a clique. ♥️♥️♥️
You meet amazing people by welcoming and engaging with different people in cups! ☕️☕️☕️
☀️☀️☀️
The one challenge I have is I am a one finger typed on my phone but I am pretty fast lol 😂 but if I see they have been welcomed it’s ok on a speedy chat I may not welcome however of someone is missed I definitely will welcome. 🙈🙈🙈
j
See the typos one finger typer too fast 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣