How you can deal with prank chats
In this thread I'm just going to talk about the bast way to deal with prank chats and what you should try to avoid doing. These are just some ideas and rules I follow so I thought I would share them with you.
Never ask a guest or member if they are being serious or if this is a prank chat:
When you are dealing with a chat that you suspect is a prank. Don't ask them "Are you pranking me?" By asking this question, you are basically telling the guest/member that you don't really believe what they are telling you. Which can cause offense and serious upset. We never truly know if the person on the other end is telling us the truth or not so always assume that what they are saying is true.
If they break the rules report/block them:
Just like any guest/member, if they break the rules report the chat.
Treat them with respect:
Yes, you might be feeling a little annoyed at them, but treat them with respect, just like you would with anyone else. Use this as a chance to sharpen up your listening skills.
ONLY end the chat if they admit that this is just a prank... but politely of course :)
So if they finally admit that the conversation you have had for the past half an hour was all fake, explain to them that you are now going to end the chat and move on to your next chat. You should do this in a polite way and not make them feel bad for there actions.
Why should I do all of this if I'm just being pranked?
When a member or guest come to this website, it means that they know that this website exists (of course) they know people can get support here. So although this person is pranking you, you need to show them that 7cups is a place they can turn to when they need support. They might not need the support right now, but maybe 6 months later something has happened and they need someone to talk to, they know about 7cups because they pranked ya, and if they got treated with respect they are more likely going to come back when they need really support. If you where rude to them, it's not very likely that they would come back when they really needed the support.
This is just some things I go by when ever I deal with such a chat, I hope this helps you.
Smile more,
Harry
@harrytheunicorn, thank you for this great post!
I especially enjoyed your last paragraph: we really can't know when, and in what ways a person will benefit from our support. It is not wasted, even in more implicit, or in potentially future settings. We also don't know just what has driven the person to seek a chat with us, and I believe it's good not to score and value these drives based on our own perception and reasoning.
A chat that does turn out to be a prank can surely leave us feeling discouraged or like our time and energy were wasted, while we could have been helping a person with what appear to us as more legitimate problems. I like to take it this way: as long as within our community guidelines (and our own personal boundaries), being available to take on a chat and talk to a person was our own conscious decision. We have decided to offer emotional support to a fellow human being and we've done what we could to fulfill that. There is greatness and value in that, regardless of how genuine the chat turned out to be. Offering a safe space - and keeping it open - is not a waste. Safe spaces are not the kind of spaces that the world has in abundance.
Have a lovely day! :)
Hi! Yesterday evening I had a very mortifying experience. I answered a request and the member took ages to answer one single word, even just to a simple question such as "are you still online?" after waiting for 10-15 minutes witout any sign of life, while other requests were piling up. I politely said I had to go answer other request and we could get in touch later. After half an hour, he (I'll randomly guess he is a man) asked if I was a bot ("lol"), to which I replied I was not and now I could talk, without any reply in return; after another half an hour, he wrote "ur reported", then nothing more, although I asked him what he meant and if I could help or listen to him (his online sign was always green, and it still is today, the morning after).
It feels so sad to get "reported" (what does it mean? I didn't receive any notification about this till now), while I'm volunteering during my free time. Luckily my mentor (asthebeesays) was very encouraging and kind to me!
What do you do in this kind of situations? Both when you suddenly have to wait for long for unknown reasons (not necessarily pranks, yet you can't be sure then), and when you actually feel wronged/pranked in the end.
Thank you for your attention!
* PS sorry, English is not my first language.
@asthebeesays
@KintsugiCup
In response to your other question, if someone doesn't respond initially, ask again after a couple of minutes if they're there. If they don't reply, say you'll end the chat soon. If there's still no response, you can tell them to browse listeners and end the chat. If they reply after that, you have no obligation to respond, unless you're ready/wanting to listen. :)
I got falsely reported and suspended due to it once and I was devastated! Now I'm super conscious of it so I often e-mail 7 Cups if I've had an odd chat and I get the feeling they'll leave a false report.
@SilentSerenitya
A bit late but thank you! I am so sorry for your experience too. It must have felt terrible. You're very nice to give support and advice like this. Your suggestions sound very practical yet kind. Thank you!!
@KintsugiCup
Hiya,
Sorry to hear that you got reported for no reason, what you could do is email 7cups at: community@7cups.com Let them know the situation and what happened. They may look into it but you have done nothing wrong. You where still respectful, kind and caring and you did not give up on this person. So you did you job right, you have nothing to worry about okay? :)
take care,
Harry
@harrytheunicorn
Thank you very much for your advice! I'll put it to good use. Truly, thanks.
@harrytheunicorn - Thank you for this post - it's an excellent reminder that even when someone seems like they might be pranking, we can't know that for sure and our job is ALWAYS to treat people respectfully and professionally and offer support, no matter who they are.
Very great post! A great reminder that we need to treat everyone with respect!
Hi everyone. This was a great post. It really put things into perspective for me
wow this really helped
I have had many such experiences where possibly the same person made different member accounts and sent me a personal request. They would start differently in the beginning and as we went on they would come to the same offensive content. I was of course polite throughout and suggested that they browsed throught the list of listeners as I would probably not be able to help them much. At times I eveb tried talking it through hoping that the person would have a point eventually but no.. it just kept getting offensive. And they kept coming back. I had to stop taking personal requests for a while because of that, This was a while back, I have started with the personal requests now.
I also had a similar experience as the Listener above where just within a minute or so of the chat, wherein I had just welcomed the member, they openly threatened that they would leave me a bad review. I apologised for anything inappropriate which they felt I had said and asked how I could help them but they were very rude and then left. After this I got a mail from 7cups, which informed me that I got a review which basically hinted at the fact that I didn't show much empathy..It was clearly that member who had carried out theat threat.
I understand that we need to be polite and accomodating but such people need to be told that it isn't fair that they could just bully us and trouble us as they wish so that they feel that what they are doing is wrong... I wish there was some way for that.
Sorry if I said anything wrong or unaaceptable...
@caringSunrise84
Hey there. Thank you for sharing your experiences! I am sorry to hear that you ended up getting so many abrasive rude members! I can understand that it would be frustrating doing chats and trying to be supportive and to get people who don't seem like they are there for much other than abuse you. You should never be abused. I was going to suggest taking only general requests but then I saw that you do that when this happens, which can be a short term fix if you feel you are being targeted.
Something that you can do when someone tells you that they are going to leave you a negative review or you feel that something is suspicious, you can take screenshots and when you get that email about a bad review, you can email community@7cups.com and show them the stuff that makes you think that the review is false and they will delete the review from your records. I hope this is helpful!
@BurningEmber
That sounds like a good idea. I shall try that if I experience something like this in future. Thanks :)
@caringSunrise84
You are welcome!
Keep on replying with utmost cool head so that the opposite side gets tired of his/her own game.
@optimisticMermaid03
That's what I do. I keep replying politely until they stop texting.
@damselinthisdress Good job :)
@optimisticMermaid03
Thank you. :D