Self-Harm Recovery Check-In: Tuesday, November 26th, 2019
Happy Tuesday lovely SHR Community!
This is today's gentle reminder for all of you:
Check-in questions:
How are you feeling today?
How has the week started for you?
Is there anything you are looking forward to accomplishing in the next few days, or anything you are totally not looking forward to doing?
I am looking forward to hearing from you as always!
With love from France,
Valeria
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Hi Valeria how are you?
I'm feeling a bit drained, not really tired, more so unmotivated to even do the most basic things like shower.
I'm not looking forward to anything, just wanna skip a couple of days or weeks and just not exist. I feel that could really reset me in a positive way.
@Madaraismyspiritanimal
Hi dear Richard, thank you for checking in with us today. I am always very happy to read from you.
I understand this sense of feeling drained and unmotivated. There are moments in our life in which we have no energy nor will to do anything. As you very clearly say, we simply feel like skipping a few days or weeks of our existence. It is very much ok to feel this way.
I have realised over time that this often happens to me as a result of being overwhelmed for quite some time. I wonder if this is the case for you as well. I have also noticed that the more I linger in this lack of motivation, the more intense it becomes. How do you experience it?
You made me think about DBT techniques. If you are already familiar with them, you may perhaps have heard of the Opposite Action technique, which basically invites you to do exactly the opposite of what your current upsetting situation makes you want to do. By doing an Opposite Action, we are actually creating the conditions for that positive reset you mention to happen. I wonder if you could perhaps find an easy Opposite Action that may help you recharging. Just one little thing. As, I don
@admaiorasemper
How are you feeling today?
I guess I could do better. I am panicking over having gained 1 kg over the last few days. It's soooo fucked up, and I don't know what to do. I mean... I eat very much less than I am burning, but I guess I should work out more or eat less. I have to do something at least. So I don't know what to do and I am freaking out. Life sucks.
How has the week started for you?
The week has been good so far, if you don't look at the weightgain. But otherwise it has been good. I have had my cousin on a visit for rice pudding yesterday, and that was really good and nice. Tomorrow I gotta go to phyciotherapy and push my limits. Hopefully that ends good. I really hope so, bc he has said that he will push my limites, and my knees kinda hurt. But at least I don't have the flu anymore, so I guess that's all good.
And I am talking to my therapist the next day, so it's gonna be good. I guess. I hope he says something that can stop me from freaking out and all that jazz. Mostly I just wanna cancel with him, bc I don't wanna be there at all. I really don't wanna.
Is there anything you are looking forward to accomplishing in the next few days, or anything you are totally not looking forward to doing?
I hope I can loose that 1 kg in the next few days. If not I'm gonna freak. And next month I'm gonna start in a fitness center, so it's all gonna be good. I hope.
@admaiorasemper hello! nice to meet you :)
How are you feeling today? i am pretty sick so i feel exhausted, even though i slept like 10 hours tonight.
How has the week started for you? so far pretty okay! Except being sick, i went to a concert last night with a friend of mine because it was her birthday and it was lots of fun. I am staying home today and not going to school to get some relaxing.
Is there anything you are looking forward to accomplishing in the next few days, or anything you are totally not looking forward to doing?
well, i need to study for my german exam, like NOW, but i keep finding good distractions hahahh! I am looking forward to the weekend otherwise.
Hi there @dynamicHemlock1736! Thank you for joining todays check-in, it is really nice to meet you too!
I am sorry to hear you are being unwell and I hope you will recover soon. It is a really good idea to stay at home today and have some well deserved rest. And think about memories from that fun concert!
Uhm, Deutsch lernen… kein Spass! I feel for you… I am sending you some good vibes to hopefully make it easier.
Take good care of yourself & I hope to see you again
@admaiorasemper Hey V - How are you?
Not feeling too good today - anxiety has been pretty bad. Having some problems with urges. Started last night. Been distracting like crazy.
Looking forward to finishing a table I've been working on .
Thanks for the checkin. I hope you have a good day. Take care V
@mytwistedsoul
Hi dear J, it is so nice to have you here today!
I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling anxious and are battling with urges. I am really proud of you for trying and distracting yourself. I am here for you if you would like to do that together as well. I am always willing to listen to you… and I have lots of silly stories to tell you, should you find that useful.
I find very positive that you are very invested in your work right now. I am sure that table is going to look really nice. It is amazing how skilled your hands are. How you are able to create pretty things that weren
@admaiorasemper It's good to hear that you're doing ok. Thank you for the reminder that my hands do good things. I don't like them sometimes - they seem to have a mind of their own.
Lol - it made me smile to think of Ms Louise saying hi. She's all better now? Hopping around - leaving little jelly beans on the floor? She's a very pretty bunny. I'm really glad she got better.
@mytwistedsoul
I am actually taking her to the vet later on, as she seems to be eating less and, well, pooing fewer smarties for me to find. We saw a vet on Sunday too, but she wasn't specialised in rabbits and didn't have a clue.
I think I will have to apply for a morgage to keep maintining her lol
@admaiorasemper Oh no! I'm sorry to hear she's not doing so good for you again. Hopefully it's nothing serious like the last time. Keep us posted please? Good luck with the vet visit!
@mytwistedsoul
150 euros later, Ms Louise is doing ok. I am not lol, got lots of homework to make sure she keeps pooing. I think I have got myself the most high-maintenance rabbit ever!
Here is a picture I have just taken for you:
@admaiorasemper Oh wow yeah she seems like a high maintenance bunny! I guess you really have to watch her diet now. I'm glad it's nothing really serious with her.
She is just so sweet looking
Thank you for the picture V
Hi, I'm sorry, well, i am new here, idk i'm sorry
Hi there @sensibleMango991,
A super warm welcome to you, both to the 7Cups website and specifically to our subcommunity! I am happy you have found us and I am happy you have joined our daily check-in. If there is anything you would like to share with us, please feel free to do it. We are here to listen to you and support you. There is totally nothing to be sorry about :)
@admaiorasemper Woah thank you, well, I have anorexia and haunting thoughts of relapsing selfharm, cutting. I got broke up with after 1 and half a year and it's really borthering me actually
@sensibleMango991
I really understand why you would be scared of relapsing whilst dealing with something as difficult as a break-up from a long-lasting relationship, I am sorry this has happened to you. Having urges of turning to a familiar coping mechanism when we are in distress is very normal, but we can learn to use healthier alternatives. Can you think of any alternative that seemed to be working ok for you in the past?
You may have already found out this by yourself, but there are two more subcommunities that you may perhaps want to join. One is the Eating Disorder Support subcommunity, and the other one is the Relationship and Friendship Support subcommunity.
There are also a couple of self-help guides that may be interesting: Eating Disorders and Break Up Advice.
I do hope some of this helps. If there is anything else we can do, please do not hesitate to reach out. I hope to keep seeing you around!
@admaiorasemper Thank you so much, nice person
How are you feeling today?
Frustated
How has the week started for you?
Exhausting
Is there anything you are looking forward to accomplishing in the next few days, or anything you are totally not looking forward to doing?
Idk, I'm stuck up
@sensibleMango991
Ops I wrote my previous answer without realizing you had posted again. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us.
I am really sorry you are feeling frustrated. This is certainly not a very comfortable feeling to sit with, and I think it may explain why you also find yourself stuck up... I wonder if you are able to identify what is causing exactly this frustration, and what its message could be?
I am also sorry to hear this week feels exhausting to you. Are there any self-care activities that you particularly like, and that you can spend some time doing?
wOw people are nice here
@sensibleMango991 Oh thank you! This is very kind of you to say!
@admaiorasemper
How are you feeling today?
I guess I could do better. I am panicking over having gained 1 kg over the last few days. It's soooo fucked up, and I don't know what to do. I mean... I eat very much less than I am burning, but I guess I should work out more or eat less. I have to do something at least. So I don't know what to do and I am freaking out. Life sucks.
How has the week started for you?
The week has been good so far, if you don't look at the weightgain. But otherwise it has been good. I have had my cousin on a visit for rice pudding yesterday, and that was really good and nice. Tomorrow I gotta go to phyciotherapy and push my limits. Hopefully that ends good. I really hope so, bc he has said that he will push my limites, and my knees kinda hurt. But at least I don't have the flu anymore, so I guess that's all good.
And I am talking to my therapist the next day, so it's gonna be good. I guess. I hope he says something that can stop me from freaking out and all that jazz. Mostly I just wanna cancel with him, bc I don't wanna be there at all. I really don't wanna.
Is there anything you are looking forward to accomplishing in the next few days, or anything you are totally not looking forward to doing?
I hope I can loose that 1 kg in the next few days. If not I'm gonna freak. And next month I'm gonna start in a fitness center, so it's all gonna be good. I hope.
@EvilRegalsReadToo
Hi there writer :)) It is really nice to have you here today!
I am glad to hear the week has started good for you, even if today the weight gain is upsetting you. I really get how that would feel really frustrating. I know how much losing weight is important for you. I also know that you are very committed, and I am quite sure everything will become easier next month when you start working out at the fitness centre. You are taking many steps to ensure you reach your goal and I honestly think this is very inspiring. If it feels possible, I would really like you to focus on this and be compassionate and encouraging with yourself… You really deserve kind words.
You wrote it is going to be good seeing your therapist in a couple of days. It sounds like you have a good relationship with him. This is very precious and I am happy you can count on such a support. You also wrote that you mostly feel like cancelling with him because you do not want to be there. It has made me wonder about what is causing such contradictory feelings. Perhaps some specific topics you think you are going to have to discuss with him? I am mentioning this just because if you ever think it may be useful for you to reflect on this here, I would be more than happy to listen to you.
I wish you the best of luck with your physiotherapy session tomorrow <3
Hi, I'm new here
1. I've felt really low over the last few days. I am struggling to find any self worth and struggling with motivation.
2. My train got cancelled this morning on my way to work and it was a stressful day when I got to work too :\
3. At the moment I'm finding it hard to plan to do anything much productive apart from working. I'm seeing my boyfriend, whos currently away over the other side of the world, at the weekend which will be amazing, but I'm worried he is going to notice how down I am feeling.
Hi there @CelestialPheonix, welcome here! I am glad you have found 7Cups and joined our subcommunity. I hope we will be able to offer you all the support you deserve.
Thank you for checking in with us, and for sharing your feelings and thoughts for the first time in this space.
I am sorry to hear your day started on the wrong foot this morning with your train being cancelled, plus the extra stress at work. It must have felt really tough, considering you have been feeling really low in the past few days.
It is extremely difficult when we struggle to find our self-worth... This little inner critic of ours takes over and keeps saying that the good things that happen to us are purely fluke, whilst we deserve the bad ones. Once my therapist shared with me this video. I found it very interesting and helpful, perhaps you will too…
It will certainly be amazing to be with your boyfriend again! I wonder how it would feel for you to share openly with him your current feelings? Sometimes, just being heard by someone we love can make a big difference…
Take care, I hope to see you around
@admaiorasemper
thank you so much for such a kind response ☺️ And thank you for sharing that video, it made me realise how cruel my 'inner voice' is to myself 😔 I just hope one day I'll be able to start liking myself (or just even tolerating 😅). It's just hard to not be in the mindset of those people who have put me down my whole life. but it's nice being on here and finding out people care and that I don't have to beat myself up all the time. Thank you
@CelestialPheonix
You are very welcome! I have heard very mean words as a child, I know how that feels. But we can learn to substitute those bad voices we have internalised with much kinder ones. And I really hope that being here will help you in this 
@admaiorasemper thank you, I hope so too. You're voice is one of those kinder ones, so thank you
@admaiorasemper
I am feeling good. I finished my work for the day.
It started off great :)
I am looking forward to finishing my math work. I am not looking forward to going back to school.
Hi @PurpleSnail! Thank you for joining today
Hey @admaiorasemper ! How are you? Thank you for the gentle reminder to take care of myself :)
I'm very tired today. I haven't been sleeping well lately. Other than that, I could be okay if I wasn't so exhausted.
This week is the last week of classes before exams for me, so that's fun (not). I have so much to catch up on but there are only so many hours in a day! Ah well, I'll give it my best anyways
One thing I am looking forward to is Christmas break. After exams, I have a nice long break before next semester so i'll have some time to recharge. Of course I'll be working but I'll still have more time to relax.
That's pretty much it from me for now. Take care! :D
Hi there @CentreMid!
Thank you for being here with us today. I am glad you liked that gentle reminder! I am doing ok, just a bit tired today. Thanks for asking, it is very kind of you.
I am sorry to hear you havent been sleeping very well lately and are feeling exhausted. I also struggle with sleep quite often and I know that a lack of it can have such a big impact on our emotional wellbeing as well. So I do hope you will be able to catch up on that. Do you have trouble falling asleep, or do you wake up way too early?
If you havent done it yet, it may perhaps be helpful for you to read this self-help guide on how to sleep well.
Exams time can be really stressful. I am suddenly flooded with memories! But I really like your Ill give it my best attitude. We do what we can, right? Knowing that even our best can mean very different things at very different moments.
The Christmas break will be such a well deserved reward for you!
Keep taking good care of yourself.
I am not ready for the holiday's. My mom insits on playing christmas music but it just reminds me of how stressed I am about christmas. I need to get all my shcool work done today so I can take thursday and friday off, then I need to practice all my stuff for christmas performances and an audition I have coming up (I am actually very exicted for that), and I still need to clean things around the house. I was about eight weeks clean and I relapsed Monday. I'm upset but I think its okay. I have a fresh start and now I know how to get to eight weeks again (and hopefully past eight weeks). But even with all of this I am glad I've gotten to hang out with my brother and watch movies. I had a friend over Monday and we had an epic saga of board games, and another friend came over for a bit yesterday and we played video games on the Wii, which is something I havent done in years. My realationship with food has been a bit strained so I'm nervous for thanksgiving. I think it'll be okay though, I just need to be careful. I wanted to tell you how grateful I am for these threads. It's really great that there's so many people on here who are willing to help others, and you dont even have to. You don't have to help all the people on here but you do and thats amazing. I just wanted to thank you and everyone else on here for being the wonderful people that you are. 
Hi there @fairmindedRaspberries1389, thank you for joining this check-in! I am happy to read your thoughts!
I am sorry to hear about your relapse and I understand being upset about it. Do you think you can identify what triggered it? Which feelings and emotions?
Relapses happen, but they do not take away our progress. They are like little stones we stumble over on our path towards recovery. And you are very much right, you now know that you can get to eight weeks clean (which is an amazing result and I am really proud of you) and even past that.
I am happy that you also had some very nice and fun moments with your friends and your brother! And I am very curious to hear more on your Christmas performances and audition if it feels ok for you to share that.
I want to thank you as well for your nice and kinds words. They are very much appreciated, it feels very warm to know that our words can bring some support and perhaps relief to someone. I have been helped a lot on this website and I have learnt that a little kindness can do such a big difference. It makes me happy to think that I may perhaps be able to give something back too.
Take care of yourself and I wish you a nice Thanksgiving
