Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-In Sunday April 22nd 2018
Good Morning Survivor Family. I wanted to post something fun today, but due to an interruption in our peace I feel I need to address this with alle.
Whereas this is the Interweb, every now and then some ignant mcnuggett comes along and spews their uglyness and idocy in our direction.
This can trigger us, make us angry or sad, crush our will and steal our voice. This happens to many of us in many places on the web. Sometymes it's best to take a chill stance and not engage people. Or a laid back response like this...
But here is our safe place, and it is intolerable to be bullied here.
So what do we do when someone Bullies us? We Speak Out! In the real world we seek a person of authority, a Parent, Teacher, Manager/Boss, Police, Lawyer. Here you come to the Listeners. Here in Trauma Support we always seek to keep this a safe place. Our Trauma Support Room is only opened when we have enough proper staff, including Moderators,to run our Discussions, Groups, Events, and Open Chat safe and flwing in a constructive manner. In Our chatroom we always are watching over everyone (ye may have seen me there 
). Here in the Forums there are a few things can be done.
#1 Flagging.
This will mark the forum post for a Forum Mentor to look at. It can be a slow process, but it will make the offending post dissappear untill you refresh or leave the thread and come back to it.
#2 Seek a familiar Listener and bring it to their attention.
Any Listener can get in touch with a Forum Mentor and send the issue their way to be edited or deleted.
#3 On the Trauma Support Community Home Page, you may notice the menu bar just under the headder. There under Leaders, you will be able to link with any Listener on the team including being able to message our community mentor leader @Rain45 who is happy to be pmed. Forum Mentors and Forum Member leaders are those with editing abilties and who can also delete posts that you may wish deleted, so they would be your next port of call. Also you may pm @MonBon & @Anomalia our forum Ambassadors for assistance. You can also leave a tag for one of our team to respond to a post you may be concerned about.
Those on our team who are members can't be messaged by a member, and there are Teen Listeners there that can't be accessed by adults unless they are an Adult/Teen Listener. But posting one of us may be one of the fastest ways to get any situation addressed. You alle may always post me for anything, I am in and out every day and often, and I will do what it takes to get things sorted.
#4 you can pm @Laura or @Kate if no one from Trauma Support is available, but they are very busy and it may take a bit.
Never take bullying nor abuse from anyone! Never let them take your voice! Speak Out and Be Strong!
We alle care about you one and alle, and we will fiercely protect you to the best of our abillities.
Alle that having been said, how are you alle doing today? Well I hope. Still accepting recipies of alle kinds. Drop us a line and let us know what is going on with you. 
This IS a Safe Place, use your voice.
To add or remove your name to our new Trauma Sub Community General tag list to be notified of new threads in the Trauma Sub Community please click here
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edited by Rain45 Updated contact information
@Raveninthelabrynth
Thank you for bringing this up here and thank you so so much for taking care of us and keeping this a safe place *hugs* you're all doing a great job...
So right now I'm trying to distract myself, having sudden mood changes between desperate and hilarous, so distracting myself with online shopping (credit cards rock 😁) and talking to my warrior friends here 😊
We won't give up, we won't be silenced, we all have a voice and we claim the right to speak up...
@courteousNorth5140 It is Alle Our Honour and Privilidge to serve Alle of our members and each other.
Trauma Support isn't just a community and a team, it's a Family.
Ok so like be waaaay careful with that card, doom happens fast.
An lets be honest here a second, although it may look cool at 3am, do you really need a suit of Roman Centurian armor? I mean unless like me you are to be burried in it, it's not really that helpful lol
Yes hon Always speak out! Always use your voice and let no one silence you ever or again!
@Raveninthelabrynth
😂 That actually made me laugh 😂 ehm, no, no roman centurian armour, although, would be great, because of warrior and all, but no 😂 just chucks, I need those, really 😊
And you are right, this really is a family and I feel honoured to be part of it somehow... That sounds weird, hm, well... Just, thank you all...
@courteousNorth5140 My people are buried in their armor.
And whereas I have changed my body, I so have to get new armor myself ironicly lol.
I'm having this made for me.
@Raveninthelabrynth
Wow, that's quite impressive 😳 but I think I better go for the chucks 😁
@Raveninthelabrynth Soooo cool! My ancestry is Irish / German with some First Nations mixed in due to my family being early settlers in Canada. Ive been researching old scripts for Celtic symbols and ancient German scripts and found out the original Germanic languages originated from basically the Swedes and Vikings etc. Since Ive always been drawn to Viking legend and Celtic folklore as well as native culture Id say thats perfect 😉. I just got a new tattoo the other day of the Ogham for Beithe . The symbol for the Birch tree in Celtic astrology- to symbolize new beginnings, getting rid of the old season and purity and innocence attached with wisdom. As well as a strong physical trunk to ground me 😉. Im still trying to think of a Viking tattoo now! As theyre supposed to be done on the prime/ sexual meridian points as the warriors did. This one is going to take a lot of thought. My version of armour.
@purpleWest8143 Very cool! Ogham is cool, never fully learned to read it alle, but the tombs say some interesting things.
My primary language is Olde Norse ( yes like the Latin of Germanic languages) combined with the dead dialect of Tara Gaelige. Second language is National Gaelige otherwise known as the West Munster dialect. Let me know if you need some help in a translation. Never use google translate with gaelige, it comes out alle wrong in often bad ways lol
@Raveninthelabrynth Ill totally take you up on this 😉 thank you!
I just wanted to say a big big thank you to everyone in this community for having my back, for helping me to keep my head just above the water, for helping me hang on and for reminding me that my voice matters even when it feels like it has been taken from me again.. Sending so much love to everyone 
@calmLake1999 Much Love Sister Calm
Hey Raven! thanks a lot for this - a very important message for our community.
My day is going ok - feeling mentally unstable but still trying to stay positive even though its difficult today. But I hope tomorrow will be better sending lots of love and best wishes!
@Hope3729 My Pleasure Dear
We rise, fall, an rise again and yes there is always a new day. Be well Hope take some good care of yourself.
@Raveninthelabrynth thanks so much ! <3 hope you are feeling well and wish you a great day!
I've had nothing but caring responses from the trauma community, and I'm sad to hear that others haven't had that experience.
I actually had a poor experience in the depression support chat last night/this morning.
Folks were talking about the specifics of their suicide attempts in the past and talking about how to make sure it 'worked' next time. I asked them to change the subject to a more supportive topic (literally with those words) and they all gained up on me saying that I was making them feel unwelcome and I was being unsupportive. I lost my cool and ended with "Well thanks a**holes, I'll just go call a crisis line myself."
I did end up calling crisis last night. It was my first time ever calling. I've only texted in before.
I was connected with a 7cups listener who never responded after giving me a hello. I called my fiance twice and he hadn't picked up, and my other support people didn't answer. That's when I decided to call a hotline. I felt so alone last night. It's rolled into today. My support people didn't even comment today on how I was trying to reach them at 3am , yet they all had other topics they wanted to talk to me about.
Sorry for such a downer of a check in today. My save-face is telling me I should say something positive and add a silver lining but I also don't want to minimize my feelings.
@AnyaEmpathyMonster Not at alle hon, always speak your heart. We alle have bad days hon. M sorry you were so poorly treated as well.
Safe Hugs if you want them
@Raveninthelabrynth
*Hug!*
@AnyaEmpathyMonster hey! i am so so sorry to hear you had to experience that last night/this morning darling :(
you dont need to always say something positive and pretend to feel good. We are here for you and want to support you and theres no need to minimize your feelings. This is your safe place to vent and we love to listen to you!
Thanks for reaching out and telling us how you really feel. It is often very difficult to talk about our feelings, but we are here for you regardless you feel positive, negative or anything in between <3
wishing you the best and hope your day will get better soon.
@AnyaEmpathyMonster Im really sorry about your experiences last night. Im actually surprised that topic wasnt moderated in a chat room?
And Im sorry that No one in in your usual support network was available for you nor acknowledged that you had tried to reach out to them 😞
as for listeners on here, Ive had the same thing happen before as well and Im not sure why that is? Maybe some people respond to a chat request not realizing they arent going to be available to continue... I really have no idea why that happens. Its too bad.
I hope that you felt supported by calling the hotline and that they were helpful.
@Raveninthelabrynth This weekend has been something. I'm feeling my depression sinking back in, and I hate that because I was happy, and it felt like nothing could stop it, and yet here I am.
@FangsInsanity Hugs Fang. Rise an fall. Iss Lifa.
Theres always better days ahead hon
@Raveninthelabrynth You're right, but sometimes it doesn't feel like it. lol
Hello! I just joined today so forgive me for any formatting errors!
I'm doing okay. I'm just following my path for today and thinking of a goal/motivation to set for myself.
@SentientCozyTeacup
Welcome to the community! Are you looking for a short term it long term goal? (:
@AnyaEmpathyMonster
At the moment I'm just aiming for some short term goals! I decided to set the one the site wants me to set as drinking more water. Simple, but doable!
@SentientCozyTeacup
I think I should be doing that too! GL !
@SentientCozyTeacup welcome!! We are so glad to have you with us and we are so happy to have you in our trauma family
goals are amazing and really important! I wish you best of luck with your goal and if you ever need help with it, remember, the trauma family is here for you and we d love to help you on your journey.
Wishing you the best and hope to see you around :)
@Hope3729
Thank you! I hope to be around more too. Great to meet you. <3
@SentientCozyTeacup Hi Sentient, sorry I didn't respond to your post yesterday, I'm in the middle of moving and was reworking my water piping (not fun).
Welcome to this incredible community, please make yourself at home.
On the losing end of this battle. Flashbacks hitting me over the past few weeks are taking their toll. I am full of shame and guilt and the despair of my complicity. My inability to get a grip on my thoughts and the dissociation leaves me with such hopelessness. I can't see the point in my existence.
I'm sorry. I have been so much stronger than this. I'm sorry. I can't put all the pieces back together again. I'm sorry. I lost myself somewhere long ago. I'm sorry.
@affectionateNorth4018
oh my heart feels for you right now, I know that feeling. It's hard to believe, but it is only a temporary feeling and you will return to feeling more grounded. Sending positive vibes and hoping that you can make it through today to see tomorrow <3
@AnyaEmpathyMonster thank for your thoughts. Not sure how this day will end. My support is nonexistent and sleep seems to elude me too.
@affectionateNorth4018 Hugs North, surely there is always support to be found here
an like they said in the pirate movie, "Surely one must first be lost in order to find themself."
@Raveninthelabrynth
You writing this encouraged me to post my thoughts and feelings on Facebook, where I had been scared to before. Because you said use your voice and speak out. So instead of acting ashamed, and letting the shame I feel for not having a business, etc, I spoke my words.
I feel frustration and anger today that I am not where I want to be or think I should be or could be, or where I think I am supposed to be. I feel shame. I want to shut out the new person that I met because I do not think he can understand me or support me, and because I feel scared.
@singercrystalspirit Hej Singer, glad to hear you used your voice, Well Done!
Try to not make any hasty moves hon. If you recently met him, how would you be able to know what he will understand or be tollerant of? Communication is key. If he is a good man, he will try whether or not he understands.
@Raveninthelabrynth
Oh, Raven. I deleted my Facebook post. I couldn't bear to keep it up. I feel such shame and judgment on myself for the methods I've tried to use to communicate for all these years.
You are right. If he is a good man, he will try anyway. It is my fear that is huge that I will feel rejected and abandoned once again. I have not made any hasty moves on the outside such as cutting him out. I am trying, instead, to let go of him on my inside. He lives 2,800 miles away from me anyway.
@singercrystalspirit From alle I have been through I have a tendancy to push people away in alle kinds of ways. I learned to see myself doing itand having the thinking. So now when I notice I'm doing it I ask myself why, and is it nescessary.
Only 3 years ago when I was being trafficked, I pushed everyone away then too. I had met someone I could speak with and fell hard for him and he I. We became an online couple, but he lived 1,000 miles away.
One day he asked me if there was any good resturaunts near me I like, then asked me to dinner. Thinking it was a game I agreed but well you know. Didn't seem real. Then one day he showed up at my door, took me out for a wonderful evening. He stayed at my home for a month, helped me tend to my particulars, them packed up everything I owned and brought me home with him. I totally feel like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, but in a more scary an hardcore way.
"Anything is possible if you wish for it hard enough." (Peter Pan)
@Raveninthelabrynth
Something about what you wrote made me cry really hard for several minutes and just start saying "I want to come home." (Like I was talking to someone who had magically sent me away from home.) It touched a deep place in me.
It's also really strange that you quoted Peter Pan, because this guy I have been referring to ... he specifically made a reference to Peter Pan on the first time I "met" him (online).
@singercrystalspirit I'm so sorry Dear Singer, I never wish nor intend to make anyone cry. One way or another most alle of us move away and Home becomes where you make it.
That is strange
@Raveninthelabrynth
No don't be.... I hold some hope in my heart for something so dear to me I barely dare to hope.
I would like to find "home" again, for the first time in maybe sixteen years.
@singercrystalspirit A line from a song I very much identify with...
"Woe is me I am so homesick!
But it ain't that bad. "Cause I'm homesick for the home I never had." (Homesick by Soul Asylum)
Huge Hugs hon, I hear ye.
@Raveninthelabrynth
(holding a lighter in the air)
@singercrystalspirit lol Rock On Singer!
@Raveninthelabrynth
hi!
today was a good day! i was out for the afternoon at the mall! i got some really cute clothes (including a crop top--a first ever for me!) and i got some candy from a really cute candy store too! it was really nice to get some good exercise and surprisngly i wasn't really anxious at all until i went into the last store. at that point i was feeling incredibly anxious and uncomfortable because i felt like i didn't belong in there. there was only straight sized clothing in there so i felt like i really stood out as the fat gal walking around in there. my mind was like, "you're too fat, you're ugly, you don't deserve to be around such beautiful clothes and people, there all staring at you." i ended up getting out of there really quick. but i mean, over all it was a good day!
@Moonberrycat
I'm sorry to hear that your anxiety prevented you from shopping at the last store, but I'm really happy to hear that you had a good day over all! Man, I do not have enough confidence or style to wear a crop top! I hope it's cozy for the summer (:
@Moonberrycat Hej Moon, thats awesome to hear of the fun you had. Don't let that last shoppe bring you down when alle the others were fun.
Best to keep the happy times in our minds an let the rest go.
Hey! Today I feel not so good ... exactly one year ago I was at a very dark point in my life and made my biggest mistake ever. I am trying to not think about it too much - but I cant help it. Doing sports helps me to distract myself but I still feel very confused and sad. But I hope everyone else is having a good day! <3
@dynamicHemlock1736 Hej Hemlock, sorry you're caught up in some woe.
But I bet one year ago you didn't expect to be here or this far along.
Always changing, always a new day.
