Questions and concerns regarding the Dissociative Disorder community on 7 Cups
Purpose of this post
I have found in the past few months that many members and listeners who struggle every day with a dissociative disorder, or are an ally of the dissociative disorder community, are continuously dissatisfied with the lack of support options for them. It is proving more and more difficult to find a listener who has general knowledge of what a dissociative disorder is, and separates us from being able to get the support that we deserve. This is also an issue for other communities as well. I believe that providing education on Dissociative disorders in the training and certifications section on the listener's account would be a helpful start. We also feel very isolated when it comes to group support. We find that our issues feel as if they are pushed aside and disregarded and would love to see a plan in place to create a dissociative disorder specific group support room on the teen side (and the adult side if it is not existent already). I understand some of this may be in progress, but it would be helpful to know about that.
Now for some education on dissociative disorders.
There are a variety of dissociative disorders that many of the people on 7 Cups experience. I, personally, experience Dissociative Identity Disorder, also known as DID, and previously known as "Multiple Personality Disorder". This disorder is caused by childhood trauma around the ages of 7 and 8. The child brain is still forming personality, and due to trauma, it "splits" off into what are known as "alters". These alters have a variety of roles to help protect and help the "System" (sometimes known as a "collective") function. The ages of the alters can vary from even just a baby, to 99 years old, to ageless. The gender of the alters also varies and can be the same as the body, or different, or a mix of both. These alters also are as human (some non-human but I won't get into that now) as we are. They experience emotions and such things like every other human being on earth and deserve support. I know all of you are trying your best, but we can still do better to make support available to systems. I also encourage you all to do your reasearch on dissociative disorders to help you better understand. Thank you for reading this and have a wonderful day. 
Feel free to add to this thread if you are a DID/OSDD/ or someone who experiences a dissociative disorder, or even just an ally to add more information about Dissociative disorders. Also feel free to ask questions.
Remember to always be supportive and kind in your comments. Remember to check the Posting guidelines before posting.
Tagging @Fullhousesystem @WarriorHeartsSystem @Jaxnwonderland @EmptyAquarium @Fireskye13 @KimmKimm (feel free to also @ anyone you believe could contribute to the conversation)
(This post is meant to being educational, if I have offended anyone please know that I am sorry and that I am just doing my best to help the Dissociative commmunity)
@InkyOak12
@leafycup
Great post, Leafy! I love how informative and friendly it is. I am not a part of a system myself, but I have done a lot of research on the topic and I'm here for anyone who needs it :) I have a lot of friends here who are alters in DID or OSDD systems, and I hope they find 7Cups to be a welcoming and supportive space.
@leafycup
Yes, Wolf could not have said it better. Thank you, Leafy, for bringing up an important conversation about awareness and education. Although I myself am not part of a system, I did my best to learn about them after meeting some lovely alters and system members here; and I do hope that 7cups becomes a place of safety and healing for anyone affected by DID or OSDD.
@leafycup
Leafy, this is a great way to explain it. So clear and friendly. I know it will help a lot of people. Thank you for taking your time to write this post. You're great! 💖
@welcometochat @puggybearjade @insertpunhere
@unnamedcat
@Kimmkimm
yes kimberly ?
@unnamedcat
ough. right
wow - still call me pun - hehe
we didn't even recognise it
thank you for you're acceptance of plural people
many people in other communities that I used to use were far less suportive
we were often told that it is not a real condition that it is [name other disorders here] and/or that it is fastitious disorder and I consider us lucky that unlike many of the systems we are close too that have not experianced worse
little kareney but I don't know how else to put it
there are lots of people with did and osdd here and it is a very accepting community
we love each and every one of you
thank you
@unnamedcat
thank you for the upvote ^w^
@unnamedcat
should have read the initial posts too
we thought this was at the bottem of the poetry thing
I have no clue why
we aren't the sharpest knife in the caeser so our apologies
@unnamedcat
thank you for all the upvotes
@unnamedcat
I'm glad to have you here💗
@Kimmkimm
thank you kimberly
@leafycup
Hi there,
Thank you for this informational post. The reason it feels like there isn't much DID content at the moment is because there isn't that much Trauma content at all. The team has been in the middle of rebuilding for several months now. Getting listeners for DID is about the same as trying to get listeners for trauma in general, which is why it's quite difficult to both build a trauma team and to sustain it, as burn out can be high here. More training is definitely going to be a plus and I am currently in the middle of rewriting part of the training. I will keep this post in mind when I do so. As for the teen side, I find the teen side of trauma has always suffered, perhaps because teen survivors of trauma are normally still IN their trauma and aren't ready to commit to listening about it, or being a part of leadership. This means we need more ATLs, which are rare on their own. It is something I will encourage our adult side to pick up, though.
I'm sorry if any of this sounds like excuses, I'm really just trying to be transparent. Trauma has always had a hard time sustaining its team and covering every section that needs covering. I know that for a while there was a weekly DID group. Perhaps we can work towards that, but it means we need more room supporters and mods who are willing to commit to this every single week, and it's tough to come by that level of commitment in Trauma unfortunately. It is simply the reality of things. I want to build a team that will have more training and be more burn-out proof. But at the end of the day this is a volunteer website. No one is getting paid or receiving any compensation. We haven't been through decades of school on how to treat people or how to keep ourselves well while we are helping.
I think your suggestions about dissociation training for listeners would be great. I also hope to revamp training for it within trauma.
Thank you for your time in writing out your thoughts and the information. Trauma and dissociation survivors always need more advocacy, and it's awesome to see fighters like you out there <3
@Hoxenos
Thank you so much for your input, gosh I would lead a discussion every day if I had to and I wouldn't think twice, again thank you so much
@leafycup
I've known quite a few people who dove in like that, went really good for about a month, and then become inconsistent and eventually leave the site because they feel I suppose guilty about not meeting their commitments because of their mental health. If you want to help out, I strongly suggest applying to be a room supporter or mod for teen side of trauma and we can get something rolling. Change starts with each of us afterall.
The key is to be monitoring your own health and being honest with yourself. Put on your oxygen mask before assisting others, as they say. I see that you're currently a room supporter already, you can always be a room supporter in trauma as well and we can get you leaqding sessions as soon as you want to. You can also apply to be a forum supporter to help with the DID and dissociation sections of the forum if this would interest you. This being said you need to be very careful abotu not taking too much on. Although, I find that is a learning process for all survivors, figuring out how to only take on so much healthily.
I worry a bit about the statement "I would do a session everyday if I had to" because you're putting the well-being of others over yourself. We always need to take care of ourselves first, because the members wouldn't want us to be hurting ourselves in order to help them. They would feel grateful but also incredibly guilty, which isn't fair to them I find.
Thank you again for the post and I hope to see your passion on the team soon :)
@Hoxenos
thank you for your response but we already though it would likely be too much of a commitment
we meant reading up on it before hand so that we can work on the application of it in rooms such as the sharing circles
we should be more clear ; sorry
to be honest I can't even get out of bed to revise most days so....
@unnamedcat
Hi Unnamed,
Sorry for the confusion, this reply was for Leafy and that's why maybe it felt overwhelming for you. They had spoken about wanting to help out, so I figured I would speak to that. I replied to your interest in developing your active listening skills on one of your replies further down the post. Sorry again for the confusion :)
@Hoxenos
that was compleatly our fault
I am so so sorry
@unnamedcat
Nothing to apologize for, the forums can be so confusing!
@Hoxenos
thank you
@Hoxenos
Thank you so much for being so active on this thread, it has helped a lot. I will definitely consider applying to be a room supporter for this community, thank you again.
@Hoxenos
Once again, I have to say, the old quote I adore "If you aren't part of the solution, then you are only part of the problem". You are truly diggin deep around this place and coming up with solutions. Bows in front of greatness, will sit and watch you shine! 
@Hoxenos
umm...
hello
we have did but are very bad at active listening
it would be nice to read the relevant reading materials and guidence
if you could please guide us to the reccomended reading, then that would be much appreciated
thank you in advance Mx hoxensos
@unnamedcat
yeah
umm... thank you
I read your profile and admire your open-ness
thank you
@unnamedcat
Hi there, thanks so much for your reply and interest in active listening. As for active listening in general, there are many listener trainings available when you make a listener account under the "trainings and certifications" tab, I'm not sure if those are available or visible on member accounts. As for resources for trauma, I know tht there is a traumatic Experiences training, but like Leafy said, there is not adequate information on dissociation and DID. The skills I have personally have come froma combination of personal experiences and materials I have sought out. I have also had a fair few members with DID take the time to educate me further on their needs from a listener.
As someone with personal experience, you have the advantage of knowing how someone with DID would like to be spoken to. When I speak with members about trauma, I try to keep in mind the keys of trauma informed practise which are transparency, safety, validation, cultural/gender issue awareness, collaboration, and empowerment/choice. Trauma survivors need to feel safe and are striving to feel in control in a world and situation where they feel they have none. I try to make sure they feel valid and are not alone. These are the strategies I personally employ.
As for more official resources on listening to someone with DID, I know that there are a decent amount of resources in this section of the trauma forums, but I will see if we can dig some more up for you. please give me a couple days <3 I think it's awesome that you want to develop these skills, as they are desperately needed. You're rockstars!
And thank you for the kind words about my profile. I always try to be open about my life and situation. I know not everyone is and that's ok, but for me, part of my healing was owning my story. I try to give back by showing that we are never alone.
@Hoxenos
thank you so much
we assumed that the resorces may have been at hand but it if it an issue please do not go out of your way to do it
I really apreciate it
thank you for everything you have done
It helped that you came out about your trauma because we do feel less alone now and I wish we had the courage to do the same
@unnamedcat
Hi Unnamed,
Disclosing doesn't happen all at once, and it can't be forced. It happens when the time is right. And then... it's easier after that. And it gets easier every time sort of. It's really about being honest with ourselves and listening to our needs. When it is safe to heal, you will <3 Being on 7cups is a great resource to be using, it means you're putting a lot of effort into being well, and that's an awesome thing to be proud of <3
As for me I only disclosed at 19 to my best friend, it took me another few years to tell my family, and from then on I kind of just told most people. Sometimes I blurted it out to random strangers. Disclosure is funny that way and sometimes it sneaks up on you a bit. The more you tell the more you realize that the people who respond badly generally have their own issues and it's not about you.A cvery important thing though, is that you do not need to tell your story if you don't want to. You do not owe anyone your story, and you don't necessarily NEED to tell it to be well. Listen to yourselves and figure out what you NEED, that is the key <3
@Hoxenos
thank you very much Mx. hoxensos
@unnamedcat
Hi again Unnamed,
Here are a couple quick links from the forum, feel free to read them through and let me know what you think, if they help? I'll keep an eye out for other resources for you.
@Hoxenos
aww. thanks
@Hoxenos
Thank you for those links
it was nice to see some of the diffrent ways that others cope that we have not thought of and it was also nice to see others being so supportive.
thank you
@Hoxenos
Gotta' say, all of your posts are amazing! You got this my friend! *high fives*
@leafycup
Oh my gosh leafy, this is so pawsome!!! Thanks so much for putting this together. Amazing job, friendly supportive, informative. 💖.
Hang tough stay pawsome ur friend 🔥
@Fireskye13
Thank you Stay amazing
@leafycup
Thank you. I totally agree with this. I have had a really hard time, and are still searching, for a listener who understands our condition. With the lack of support irl, it's really important to have support at least online. So thank you, the whole system really appreciates it <3
-Emmy (Host)
@leafycup
I wanted to thank you for your wonderful post! Indeed, I do find it to be incredibly educational! I must say, I have always felt the same, hoping that there could be some specific training in one of the training guides so that listeners can understand when others suffer from DID.
As for me, I have just enough back ground to understand or to at least have learned enough to figure things out quickly in a chat with a member. I have been concerned before. I will be incredibly forth coming and say that I have had chats in the past with members of the DID community. Every chat I have had was wonderful, incredibly rewarding for them as for me. But see, the thing is..........is that somehow I knew to ask some of the right questions and know to be aware. After my chats I simply felt grateful that I was the one they ended up with because, I really worry that other listeners won't understand at all. As in, if a listener is speaking to a member and then suddenly they tell you they are someone else, many don't know of alters that will come through. Would a different listener think this is a prank? And hurt the feelings of an alter that felt comfortable enough, the courage enough to come through and chat as well?
Or an alter that comes through and types everything backwards, each word backwards and the entire sentence backwards. The brain is an amazing thing and some alters are capable of truly amazing things. Luckily for me, I got out a pencil and piece of paper, and had to sit and write out the whole time on paper next to my computer to decifer what that alter was trying to say to me. I wondered after our chat had ended if a different listener would have seen this as a prank or someone simply typing random things on a page. There was nothing random at all about their messages. Once again, this person was true and kind and good and just wanted to chat, just like anyone else.
I applaud you! I think an additional training guide would be wonderful for listeners to get a better understanding! I certainly am not here to broadcast my services, thinking that I'm someone that is able, knows everything, can always be super helpful to anyone and everyone in the DID community. I certainly cannot say this is my specialty or my forte, but I did it because I at least understood enough going into it, I didn't discount them or their feelings and I care about all of us here on 7 cups! big *hugs* to you and yours!
I do not suffer from DID but I do my best in chats and care for everyone no matter what the chat topic
@SparkyGizmo
you seem nice
*hugs
@unnamedcat
Many thanks my friend! Thank you for your kind message for me today! I am lucky in that your message to me is the very first thing I get to see today when signing onto 7 cups! Thank you for making me feel good, thank you for giving me a compliment and thank you so very much for your postive affirmations of me! You seem so very nice too!
I send you big *hugs*
@SparkyGizmo
thank you
@leafycup
Hello leafycup,I am Jack an alter of skyes. I read your comments and I must say I'm impressed, very well written, very well researched, you obviously know your subject.
Thank you for writing and sharing this, I, and the rest of the SystemFireSkye appreciate your efforts to bring awareness to the community, my hats off to you.
Have a pleasant day, Jack 😎🖤
@leafycup i may have some form of DID. i'm not sure. i have a system and i can definitely hear them, but they've never fronted. i'm a bit confused about it but it's ok
@galaxywatcher
@galaxywatcher
don't worry things get confusing and it can be a struggle
just as you feel you are making progress so many more alters appear that you can't understand who is fronting and then other older ones stop fronting et cetera et cetera
it's a journy and it can really help to speak to other systems when first trying to get to know yourselves
feel free to contact us via our listener account @nekomancers (awfull name ; we know)
you can dm us and we may be able to arange a time
@nekomancers
sorry for putting the @ thing twice
umm..
good luck on your quest
take care