April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM)
Statistics on Sexual Violence~
In America, someone is sexually assaulted every 68 seconds. 1 in 6 girls/women and 1 in 33 boys/men have experienced some sort of sexual violence in their lifetime. 1 out of every 10 rapes have male victims. Girls and women are at the highest risk of being affected by sexual assault. 82% of all victims under the age of 18 and 90% of all victims 18+ are female. Transgender students and Native Americans are also at a high risk of falling victim to sexual violence. 21% of TGQN (transgender, genderqueer, nonconforming) students in college have been a victim of sexual assault and American Indians have twice the likelihood of any other race to be sexually assaulted at some point in their life. It is important to remember though, that anyone of any race, age, gender, and sexual orientation can be a victim of sexual assault.
Long Term Effects of Sexual Violence~
There are many lasting effects sexual assault/abuse can have on a person. Suicidal and depressive thoughts can start or worsen after someone is sexually assaulted. Many people who experience sexual assault experience symptoms of PTSD during the first two weeks after the assault took place and ⅓ of them continue to experience symptoms up to nine months after. Around 70% of victims of sexual assault experience moderate to severe distress due to experiencing the trauma, which is a much larger number than that of any other violent crime. Many people who have been through sexual assault or abuse have issues caused by it that affect work, school, and family life and also have increased emotional issues.
Coping After Experiencing Sexual Violence~
A lot of people may turn to self-medicating or self-harm to cope with these lasting issues. People who have experienced sexual violence are more likely to begin using drugs than the rest of the general public. Coping with day-to-day life can be hard, especially for those who have experienced sexual assault or abuse. It is important for victims to be patient and gentle with themselves as they move forward from these experiences. Finding positive coping strategies that work for you and building a support system can be especially helpful during this time.
Supporting Someone Who has Been Sexually Assualted~
It can be super hard for anyone who has experienced any form of sexual violence to open up and share their experience. It is important to remain calm, comforting, and validating to them. Sometimes they may feel ashamed or feel they are to blame. It is okay and possible to validate those feeling without agreeing with them or telling the person they are accurate to the situation. You should never pressure someone into sharing their story or giving more details than they are comfortable with, but instead be empathetic and understanding of what they are sharing with you and the amount of time it may take them to do so.
(For more stats and info you can click here)
Discussion Questions~
***You only have to share if/what you feel comfortable sharing, no pressure!***
- Have you or someone you know experienced sexual violence? If so what are some things that have helped you or that person cope with your experiences? What is your favorite coping skill?
- Is there anything you feel people don’t usually know about that you would like for people to be more aware of regarding sexual assault?
- If you could say one thing to help someone who has experienced sexual assault or abuse to give them hope or inspiration, what would it be?
Contents Credits and Shout out to @TayTayy They put their thoughts and efforts into creating this discussion. Please join us and share your thoughts.
Reminder: Your challenges, experiences, and emotions are valid. You are not alone in this journey <3
I have experienced sexual assauly. Rainn.org helps or text help to 741741!!
i use RAINN too. they are so helpful
Assault****
i was assaulted by the same guy 16 times in a time period of 6 months. The first time he held me hostage in my own home for 3 days.. and i dont cope.. i am angry that my life is ruined and he can live his life because justice in my country doesnt exist. I dont know how to cope with any of that. I guess the closest with coping i get is connecting with other survivors and knowing im not alone..
if someone opens up about their experience, be understanding and compassionate, dont invalidate their experience, no more victim blaming.. no more excuses.. and for anyone struggling with this as well…. Your body reacting to assault is a normal reaction to protect your body from harm, it does not mean you wanted it or was enjoying it..
one thing that kept me going was this quote “you survived the abuse, you are going to survive the recovery” with the right help and support.. you will not only survive but you will thrive.
@Lilyfae00 You are a strong and inspirational human being. We are all here to support you. Let us know if you need further assistance.
Thank you for sharing❤️ I am so sorry that happened to you, you definitely are correct about everything you said. And the justice system for these sorts of crimes needs to be way better than it is, everywhere. Im glad connecting with others who share similar experiences is helpful for you❤️ You’re not alone. Also, I love the quote you shared,
Really like this
- Have you or someone you know experienced sexual violence? If so what are some things that have helped you or that person cope with your experiences? What is your favorite coping skill? Hell yeah. I was basically traded for cheaper hunting licence by my father. He convinced me to go out with an older guy and when he started touching me, I argued with him and he brought me home, so nothing happend. Thank you my strong myself <3 I don't know if it would be helpful to someone... The key point in my recovery was to understand that my father is mentally ill and the fact that I don't have to forgive him. As I was always controlled by my father, I struggled to forgive him. Maybe I'll in the future - maybe not. And that's okay as long as it doesn't consume my energy.
- Is there anything you feel people don’t usually know about that you would like for people to be more aware of regarding sexual assault? Just like with everything else. Show compassion if needed but don't pity them if they are okay. These things unfortunately happen and people want to be normal again. You don't pity people normally :)
- If you could say one thing to help someone who has experienced sexual assault or abuse to give them hope or inspiration, what would it be? Talk, talk, talk. If you won't nothing will change. Whatever it means to you.
@GettingUp Thank you for sharing your experience. IMHO, it's not just Talking but Yelling and Calling for Help, if anyone touches you inappropriately be it at home or a stranger.
The world is full of sickness, the only way to survive is to be vigilant and avoid any possible risks that may turn into a threat.
Once again, don't consider yourself alone, we are all here to support you to the maximum in our due capacities.
Thanks for sharing. Im so sorry that you had to go through that. Parents are supposed to protect us and keep us safe. I understand what it’s like to have parents be the cause of the harm done to me. Im glad you know that you don’t have to forgive him and Im so happy you were able to stand up for yourself.❤️ And you are completely right, compassion goes a long way but nobody wants people to throw pity at them. Thanks again for sharing❤️
@ASilentObserver thanks for this post obs!
- Have you or someone you know experienced sexual violence? If so what are some things that have helped you or that person cope with your experiences? What is your favorite coping skill?
Yes, I have been sexually assaulted. Like you said, girls are the most at risk. I have been assaulted as a child, thankfully my mum found out before it got worse. As a teen, I was sexually assaulted by a girl in school. It was horrible, and that was the first time I consciously felt the aftermath.
The way I coped was through my friends. I wasn't silent about it, and people stood up for me. My grade was really large, and although not everyone was on my side I'm glad she was exposed so she wouldn't hurt other people.
My friends were amazingly supportive, and I'm forever grateful to them.
- Is there anything you feel people don’t usually know about that you would like for people to be more aware of regarding sexual assault?
Sexual assault isn't just r*pe. Touching someone inappropriately is sexual assault. You can be sexually assaulted even in a relationship (even when if it's a sexually active one). Everyone can be sexually assaulted.
Most times society makes you think it's your fault. ''Why couldn't you do anything?'', ''why were you with that person even when you knew they were not good?''
Remember that it is never your fault. Do not blame yourself, and do not be silent. You deserve respect, and nobody should ever violate your body, mind and soul❤️
- If you could say one thing to help someone who has experienced sexual assault or abuse to give them hope or inspiration, what would it be?
I know you may feel like your body doesn't matter anymore, especially because of the way you were treated. But it does, your body is special. You are special. And no one deserves to take away your dignity and respect, and no one ever will❤️
Thank you so much for sharing and Im so sorry you had to go thru all of that 🥺 Im so glad you’re friends were a good support for you ❤️
@ASilentObserver
Thank you so much for this event ❤️ It's such an important Topic!
Please check out General Supports Event posts on Sexual Assault.
https://www.7cups.com/forum/GeneralSupport_28/GeneralSupportCommunityTeamEvents_407/April2022EventSexualAssault_275293/?post=2925665
Lucy2
Reading this has brought back memories that I tried to bury.. goosebumps and tears while reading.. I was assaulted when I was younger, it left me with unrecovered scars and nightmares. Having no one to believe me was even more painful that the assault itself..
Maybe here we are not alone and we can understand each other but in the real world it's very hard.. every second of what happened keeps banging in my head, even after 18 years, it still hurts and I couldn't move on past it.. I hope no one gets to know what it feels like..
Thanks for sharing but don't feel that you are alone.
You can reach out to us anytime you want to share about it, to sooth your heart and soul.
Thank you for sharing❤️ Im so sorry nobody believed you and that it even happened in the first place. It’s really hard to deal with these things after they have happened. You’re so strong❤️ I promise, here at least, you’re not alone
Thank you for your kind words you have a great heart ❤️
I'm not strong at all.. I would have stopped it if I was strong but I couldn't unfortunately..
Stopping it has nothing to do with strength. Trust me, I went through it for almost 13 years. And Im only 16. It’s all about when you’re ready, you made it thru it and that in itself shows so so much strength ❤️
Thank you so much for your support ❤️
@Elena22e you can reach out to me, as you did in the past if you need to share more.
@Elena22e You are an inspiration for everyone.
@ASilentObserver I love this month, because we all get to help those who have been assaulted and taken advantage of. They lost their innocence to cruel, heartless people and they don't deserve it. I just wanna tell everyone that me and all fellow listeners are here to listen to them and help them through this struggle.
No one was there to help sadly.. the damage is already done. But it is very kind of you to say those words 💕 thank you for making us feel like we're not alone
We at 7cups are like a family, to support all those who are genuinely hurt. I know most of the times there are impostors here but the real people are always welcome. We will help and support each other as much as we can.
@ASilentObserver
Yes I have experienced a sexual violence. Things that have helped me cope are being able to talk about my experience. I would say one of my favorite coping skills is listening to music or grounding. I feel like more people especially people in foreign countries should know that what another person did to them was wrong. If I could say one thing about sexual assault/abuse I would say that it's not their fult and what the other person did is wrong. That you shouldn't be ashamed of talking about it. That I know how it feels to be scared to talk about it because you're afraid you'll be judged. It's okay not to be okay and to struggle with this for years as it takes a longer time to heal for others than some. That they are not alone and they deserve to e able to share their story. That things will eventualy get better with time and that you can get past this horrible experience.
Thanks for sharing💕 It definitely is something that is really hard to talk about and a lot of people who have been thru it hold so much shame, but you’re right that it’s not the person who was hurts fault at all. And that everyone does have different healing times
