Feeling Good Today, But Need Some Honest Support
hi everyone, its me, tona. I just want to share something. I’m actually feeling good today, but I’ve had some bad experiences with listeners here. Most of them either ghost me or go offline for two days or more. It feels discouraging when I open up and then get left hanging. Is there anyone here who knows of a listener who’s truly consistent and won’t just disappear? Like someone persistent, meaning they’ll stay in touch and actually be there for me regularly? I’d really appreciate any suggestions or support
@tona033 I'm sorry you had a bad experience. I hope you find the support you're looking for 🍀 You're not alone, and you matter 🤍 Sending lots of love to you 💕
@tona033
The listeners are volunteers and sometimes they are not consistent based on the time they have to give. there are also many who are in various time zones etc.
it is important to establish in the beginning those challenges. the best one i ever used we would leave messages and they would get back when they could and i would answer on my schedule. this is not always ideal as when we are venting or wanting a response and might not hear back for hours or a day.
it takes a few times to find a good fit ...
@toughTiger6481
I agree, it's important to try and work around each other. We all have time limitations, it's not that people don't care, they physically just can't come online sometimes 💕💜
@Amanda84 I never said I need people to be talking to me nonstop. All I’m saying is at least have the decency to reply when you’re free. Just disappearing without a word is exactly what I’m talking about, and it’s honestly annoying
@toughTiger6481 dude, i never said I expect people to talk to me all the time. What I mean is, at least reply when you’re free. Most people just disappear without a word, and that’s what bothers me.
The same things been happening with me. It's really annoying. We just need to keep looking I guess. These things could take time
I have been in this relationship for 4 years. Everything changed when he moved to Canada. He became more controlling, suspicious, and quick to anger. He often asks me to prove myself by opening my chats or call logs, and if my internet lags, he accuses me of lying or deleting things. He always says I’m the problem, and nothing I say is ever believed.
One time I told him to pay for a drink he took from me, and he got angry. He said it showed my mentality and that everything he does for me is not worth it. In the past, I once messaged a K-drama idol, and when he found out, he lost trust in me and still brings it up. Meanwhile, I’ve seen his chats with other women, even professing love while we were still together, but I’m too scared to confront him because I don’t want him to break up with me. He gets angry at small things I do, but allows questionable things on his side, like girls sitting on his bed.
He has said hurtful things, like “Who will date someone like you if I leave you.” That made me more afraid of breakup. I feel like I always have to watch what I say so I don’t make him mad. His spiritual father once told him someone close to him was doing voodoo to block his future, and he suspected me. I was shocked. When he started a business in Abuja, I saw how his uncle was milking him, but I kept quiet because I didn’t want to be seen as jealous or bad-belle(meaning I’m not happy for him). He never takes what I say seriously anyway.Earlier this year we broke up, but a few days later he called and apologized and we got back together. This has become a cycle he hurts me, apologizes, and I accept it, but the same issues continue.
I have cried too much in this relationship. I can’t speak freely. I’m holding on partly because of the plan for me to move to Canada with him. I regret some of the things I’ve said, but I also see the unfairness in how he treats me. Deep down, I feel stuck, scared, guys what do i do
Baby girl , I know u feeling sad and low and feel like u have nobody not even the man that’s playing with you . But I want you to , look at it in a different view . He doing all that and you see why he doing all of that . I know sometimes it’s hard to leave I get it . You pray more find you something that take your mind off all the negativity energy and if u can’t leave right now when ever he say something get angry just don’t say anything that will make him blow up . Pray right then in there in your head . You will get through this one way or another.
@indigoSpruce487
Hi- I was recently going through something similar. We did finally split, but it's only been a week so far. I'm familiar with that constant feeling of walking on eggshells to not upset a man that seems to have turned on you.
@tona033
I have had those experiences too and it can be frustrating when you need support. I usually prefer to use the sharing circle and the 24/7 chat suport. You can find a listener through the chat support who are usually pretty supportive
Hey there , if u need to talk ill listen
@YourNotAlone92 i really need someone to talk to
@YourNotAlone92 id really appreciate if u listen to my struggles.
Hello I m here to listen 🙂
rkive077 is a great listener, she even stays in touch. I have been talking to her for weeks now, she still replies truly a sweetheart.
Hi
You can connect with me. I’ll be there to help you.
@optimisticOrange2466 Hey, thank you for reaching out. I’m a guy, and honestly, I’ve been drowning in a lot anxiety, stress, depression, OCD like thoughts, hyperactivity, loneliness, fear, worrying, and endless overthinking. Most days I feel stuck in my head with no escape, and it gets exhausting. I don’t see a proper way to reach out to you here on 7 Cups, but I think there’s an option to turn on private chat. If you could enable that, maybe we could actually connect. Just knowing someone’s willing to be there already makes me feel a little less lost.
@tona033
Hi Tona, I am Jas. Ready to talk, listen or just be your comfort. Anytime 🫶
@Jasm1n3 thank you for your message it really means a lot. I’m Tona, I’m 18, and I’m a guy. Lately I’ve been carrying a lot anxiety, stress, depression, overthinking, fear, and it’s been heavy. It’s really comforting to hear from someone willing to listen, especially here where it can be hard to connect. I don’t see a direct way to reach out, but if you turn on private chat, maybe we could talk more. Just knowing someone’s open to being there already makes things feel a bit lighter.
@tona033
Hey, I am happy to hear that. I just need some assistance on how to turn on priavet chat...
@Jasm1n3 hey jasmin, 7 cups members can’t use private chat… it only works if one of us is on a listener account. you can switch to listener in settings if you want, then it’ll work.
Hey 💛 I’m new here but we can help each other by sharing and chatting all we want friendship, someone to listen to us and we do the same to them sharing love and support because we need this connection between us ✨
Hi, I agree. I'm also new here and am looking for an outlet in friendship & feeling like people genuinely care & open to listening. I do have a great support system offline but I feel like in some matters I can be judged silently by friends or even gossiped about & it's not a good feeling. So honestly, I figured I'd try this at least to be able to be open in a judgement free zone. I'm a woman in my early 30's married, no children. Had an emotional affair and am actively working on getting over my friend. Currently, having a hard time. Just lost my job & it's causing me to be tempted to reach out to my friend again. Looking for another healthy way to deal with my emotions so I don't back track. Letting go of my friend causes me to grieve him. We had strong chemistry & a really close connection. It really broke me heart when I decided to let him go. 💔
@convivalAvocado1138
If you would like to openly chat about it, I'd be more than willing to chat with you. I am 60 male and been with my person for 42 years.
I I'm in the same boat, had to remove myself from a 12 year friendship because I had deep feelings for my BFF at work.
We could start a thread over in the Pen Pal section if you are up to it?
@braindamag3
Thank you for your reply. I'm open for a chat. I find that not many people are willing to talk about it or unsure of how to navigate the subject with me. How can we set up a chat?
@convivialAvocado1138
I will set one up and tag you 🤗👍
