I need the strength to leave my mentally abusive husband can anyone suggest?

The first step to get out of an abusive relationship is to recognize it as such and know that it is not healthy for you. I think verbalizing it and asking for help shows that you have done that. Congratulations for that. The next step in my opinion is starting to imagine how life without your husband would look like, and I mean that also in a practical sense. Where would you go? Do you have someone you can trust, who can help you plan it, who you might also be able to accommodate you in the beginning (where he wouldn't suspect you to be)? How would your life financially look like? What would you take with you (there a lists of the most important things you should take with you that you can find online)? What can you do if he suddenly gets physically abusive too? Very often when partners sense that their partner plans to leave or has left them the abuse/violence increases, so be careful when you do your research or who you talk to. One thing you can do is start reaching out (if you prefer also anonymously) to local support places or hotlines to get information. I wish you good luck for finding that strength, I know it's already in you!

First of all, let me say that I am so very sorry you are going through this. We tend to accept the love we think we deserve and I'm not sure who wrote that it wasn't me, but it is sadly so true. I looked at my reflection once years ago in another life, and I asked the girl who was staring back at me, what gives him the right to treat me like this? What makes him think that I deserve this and th at he is entitled to treat me worse than an animal? When did I become so insecure that I would allow someone to do this to me? And what am I teaching my babies? Then I got mad. But I knew I had to keep my emotions in check for the moment. I secretly gathered only what I could not replace and I stashed it at a friend's house, some of it I hid in the bushes out front of my home. Every trip to the store I would keep a dollar or some change and hide it, and it wasn't much, but for me it was gas money and it was a lifeline and it also was a point in my court, a win. I realized that this man was laughing at me and how he victimized me and I just fell right into the role and played along. One morning, he got up for work and when he had been gone for 30 minutes and I was sure he wouldn't come back, I loaded my kids my cat and drove away. I am not telling you to do this, just sharing my story. Only when you are ready and can do so safely, only then will you know that you are able to leave. Please make sure that you have a plan and that you are safe if you do decide to leave. I wish you well, and I hope it all works out for you.