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hopefulSmiles6137 profile picture
ADHD and Relationships: How to Communicate Your Needs
by hopefulSmiles6137
Last post
 August 30th
...See more Relationships- whether romantic, friendships, or family, can be both deeply fulfilling and incredibly challenging when you have ADHD. You might struggle with forgetfulness, zoning out during conversations, or impulsively saying things you don't mean. Sometimes, people misunderstand your intentions, making you feel like you're too much or not enough. But the key to thriving in relationships is communication- honest, open and ADHD friendly communication. Why ADHD Makes Communication Tricky 1. Forgetfulness & Inconsistency- You might forget important dates, plans, or even past conversations, making your partner or friends feel unimportant. 2. Zoning Out & Distractibility- You want to listen, but your mind drifts. Even when you care deeply, people may feel like you're not paying attention. 3. Emotional Intensity- ADHD comes with deep emotions that can be overwhelming, leading to impulsive reactions, over- explaining, or shutting down completely. 4. Rejection Sensitivity (RSD)- A small disagreement or criticism can feel devastating, making you avoid conversations that could actually strength the relationship. 5. Impulse Control- Blurting things out, interrupting, or making impulsive decisions can sometimes lead to misunderstandings or conflicts. How to Communicate Your Needs in relationships Be Honest about your ADHD- Let the people in your life know how ADHD affects you, Saying, " Sometimes I struggle to focus, but I truly care about what you're saying" can help them understand. Use "I" Statements- Instead of saying, "You never understand me", try, " I feel overwhelmed when i can't express my thoughts clearly". This reduces defensiveness. Ask for Help (Without feeling Guilty)- If you struggle with remembering plans, ask your partner or friend to send reminders instead of assuming you don't care. Practice Active Listening- Repeat back key points ( " So what I hear you saying is...") to show you're engaged, even if you struggle to maintain focus. Set Communication Routines- Schedule check-ins with loved ones to address any concerns before they turn into bigger issues. Be Patient with Yourself- You won't always get it right, and that's okey. The people who truly care about you will appreciate the effort you put into communication. ADHD doesn't make you "bad" at relationships- it just mean you communicate differently. And that's okey. With understanding, patience, and the right tools, you can build strong, meaningful connections with those who truly care about you. With Love, Smiles    
hopefulSmiles6137 profile picture
ADHD and Sleep Struggles: Why Your Brain Fights Rest
by hopefulSmiles6137
Last post
 August 30th
...See more If you have ADHD, you've probably had nights when you know you should sleep, but your brain refuses to shut down. Maybe you're stuck in a late-night hyperfocus session, doom-scrolling on your phone, or just lying in bed, restless. And the next day? Exhausted, frustrated, and promising yourself you'll "sleep early tonight"- only to repeat the cycle. Why does ADHD Make Sleeping So Hard? 1. Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome (DSPS)- Many people with ADHD have an internal clock that runs later then neurotypical people. This means your brain naturally resists sleep at "normal" hours.   2. Hyperactive mind at night- Your thoughts don't slow down because the world is quiet. Instead, it might be the only time you have space to think- leading to endless mental rabbit holes. 3. Dopamine-seeking behaviors- When your brain is low on dopamine, it craves stimulation. This can lead to late-night scrolling, binge-watching, or gaming activities that trick your brain into staying awake. 4. Revenge Bedtime Procrastination- You've been mentally exhausted all day, and now that you finally have time for yourself, you don't want to waste it by sleeping. 5. Inconsistent Sleep Routines- People with ADHD often struggle with routines in general, and sleep is no exception. One late night can throw off the whole rhythm.  How to make Sleep Easier  Take a Brain Dump- If your thoughts won't atop racing, grab a notebook and write everything down before bed. If helps your brain to "let go" of the unfinished thoughts. Create a Low-Stimulation Wind-Down Routine- Dim the lights, avoid screen, and do something calming like reading a book ( a physical book , not an e-book), or listening to soft music. Set an Alarm for Bedtime, Not Just Waking Up- Many people with ADHD ignore bedtime until its too late, a reminder can help. Use the "Two-Minute Rule"- If you cant just make yourself go to bed, just get into bed. Tell yourself that you'll stay there for two minutes- often, that's enough to get your body to settle. Don't Punish Yourself for Bad Sleep- Beating yourself up over another late night only adds stress,. Accept it, and try again tomorrow. You're not lazy, and you're not broken. ADHD brain just works differently- but with a little self-compassion and the right strategies, sleep can get easier.   With love, Smiles  
tommy profile picture
ADHD Automated Taglist!
by tommy
Last post
 August 17th
...See more Welcome to the ADHD Taglist This thread is an auto-updating list. The list is regularly updated by forum leaders and can be found below. Having issues? Reply below and someone will help you! Why should I join the taglist? ✔ Never miss out on sub-community check-ins, discussions or events ✔ Get tagged and notified by community leaders whenever a new relevant thread has been posted ✔ Become a more active member of the community. What do I need to do? ✅ To add yourself to this taglist, press the Post to Thread button below and write the exact words Please add me. ❌ To remove yourself from this taglist, press the Post to Thread button below and write the exact words Please remove me. ------------------------- Current taglist as of 6 April 2024 (updated by @tommy) @Ahmedaraf @AloneGhost @azuladragon34 @blxepxndx @Bndonovan02 @BodaciousTurtle27 @Cullitrel @Dawnie0203 @empathicPresence9091 @galfromaway @GwydionRowan @hitman1789 @iinfinity5299 @Jem7Cups @jetm0t0 @Kittibear @Leahm9703 @Lillypad176 @MangusFruit9796 @MarwaneB @Pickles1989 @redNest4346 @shyCherry6521 @siddharthh @SunShineAlwaysGrateful @SupportiveMitch @ThatChristLover @The1NOnlyVenus @theboymoana @tommy @unassumingPeach6421 @UnconventionalToasterOven
dedicateyourheart profile picture
Get something off your chest
by dedicateyourheart
Last post
 Tuesday
...See more We spend so much time masking or trying to fit into a neurotypical world. I want to open the floor: what is one thing you wish people truly understood about how your brain is working right now?
DarkerPlaces profile picture
Loud brain
by DarkerPlaces
Last post
 Monday
...See more I feel like im struggling a lot these last few days with regulating emotions n understanding them. I keep overthinking evrything n getting parannoyed n feeling like im the problem n that people dont want me around n its making me feel realy low n idk how to deal with it im trying real hard to just be quiet n not snap or stuff but idk what to do 🙁🙁
alessiasmommy profile picture
ADHD question about preteen girl.
by alessiasmommy
Last post
 Friday
...See more I am the mom of a preteen ADHD girl. We are having some serious trouble with a few things: cleaning her room and keeping it clean, bras are uncomfortable and distracting. How can this be addressed?
hopefulSmiles6137 profile picture
ADHD and Relationships: How to Communicate Your Needs
by hopefulSmiles6137
Last post
 August 30th
...See more Relationships- whether romantic, friendships, or family, can be both deeply fulfilling and incredibly challenging when you have ADHD. You might struggle with forgetfulness, zoning out during conversations, or impulsively saying things you don't mean. Sometimes, people misunderstand your intentions, making you feel like you're too much or not enough. But the key to thriving in relationships is communication- honest, open and ADHD friendly communication. Why ADHD Makes Communication Tricky 1. Forgetfulness & Inconsistency- You might forget important dates, plans, or even past conversations, making your partner or friends feel unimportant. 2. Zoning Out & Distractibility- You want to listen, but your mind drifts. Even when you care deeply, people may feel like you're not paying attention. 3. Emotional Intensity- ADHD comes with deep emotions that can be overwhelming, leading to impulsive reactions, over- explaining, or shutting down completely. 4. Rejection Sensitivity (RSD)- A small disagreement or criticism can feel devastating, making you avoid conversations that could actually strength the relationship. 5. Impulse Control- Blurting things out, interrupting, or making impulsive decisions can sometimes lead to misunderstandings or conflicts. How to Communicate Your Needs in relationships Be Honest about your ADHD- Let the people in your life know how ADHD affects you, Saying, " Sometimes I struggle to focus, but I truly care about what you're saying" can help them understand. Use "I" Statements- Instead of saying, "You never understand me", try, " I feel overwhelmed when i can't express my thoughts clearly". This reduces defensiveness. Ask for Help (Without feeling Guilty)- If you struggle with remembering plans, ask your partner or friend to send reminders instead of assuming you don't care. Practice Active Listening- Repeat back key points ( " So what I hear you saying is...") to show you're engaged, even if you struggle to maintain focus. Set Communication Routines- Schedule check-ins with loved ones to address any concerns before they turn into bigger issues. Be Patient with Yourself- You won't always get it right, and that's okey. The people who truly care about you will appreciate the effort you put into communication. ADHD doesn't make you "bad" at relationships- it just mean you communicate differently. And that's okey. With understanding, patience, and the right tools, you can build strong, meaningful connections with those who truly care about you. With Love, Smiles    
hopefulSmiles6137 profile picture
ADHD and Sleep Struggles: Why Your Brain Fights Rest
by hopefulSmiles6137
Last post
 August 30th
...See more If you have ADHD, you've probably had nights when you know you should sleep, but your brain refuses to shut down. Maybe you're stuck in a late-night hyperfocus session, doom-scrolling on your phone, or just lying in bed, restless. And the next day? Exhausted, frustrated, and promising yourself you'll "sleep early tonight"- only to repeat the cycle. Why does ADHD Make Sleeping So Hard? 1. Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome (DSPS)- Many people with ADHD have an internal clock that runs later then neurotypical people. This means your brain naturally resists sleep at "normal" hours.   2. Hyperactive mind at night- Your thoughts don't slow down because the world is quiet. Instead, it might be the only time you have space to think- leading to endless mental rabbit holes. 3. Dopamine-seeking behaviors- When your brain is low on dopamine, it craves stimulation. This can lead to late-night scrolling, binge-watching, or gaming activities that trick your brain into staying awake. 4. Revenge Bedtime Procrastination- You've been mentally exhausted all day, and now that you finally have time for yourself, you don't want to waste it by sleeping. 5. Inconsistent Sleep Routines- People with ADHD often struggle with routines in general, and sleep is no exception. One late night can throw off the whole rhythm.  How to make Sleep Easier  Take a Brain Dump- If your thoughts won't atop racing, grab a notebook and write everything down before bed. If helps your brain to "let go" of the unfinished thoughts. Create a Low-Stimulation Wind-Down Routine- Dim the lights, avoid screen, and do something calming like reading a book ( a physical book , not an e-book), or listening to soft music. Set an Alarm for Bedtime, Not Just Waking Up- Many people with ADHD ignore bedtime until its too late, a reminder can help. Use the "Two-Minute Rule"- If you cant just make yourself go to bed, just get into bed. Tell yourself that you'll stay there for two minutes- often, that's enough to get your body to settle. Don't Punish Yourself for Bad Sleep- Beating yourself up over another late night only adds stress,. Accept it, and try again tomorrow. You're not lazy, and you're not broken. ADHD brain just works differently- but with a little self-compassion and the right strategies, sleep can get easier.   With love, Smiles  
independentWatermelon1572 profile picture
I need an opinion
by independentWatermelon1572
Last post
 August 29th
...See more So I need some opinions. I have undiagnosed ADHD. I live in a toxic household where nobody believes me etc etc which means I have no support at all Any opinions on what should I do? Any tips to help cope with it? I appreciate it.
PicklesANDOcean4ever profile picture
Can you relate
by PicklesANDOcean4ever
Last post
 August 29th
...See more hi my name is Jasper and I've been diagnosed with ADHD since I was 11 (almost 5 years) and something that I haven't gotten my family to understand is that feeling you get when you are stimming but you feel antsy still like you need to run or do something physically intense and the only way I could articulate it when I was younger was "i feel like I need to run" which of course confused the majority of my household. anyways I was just wondering if you guys can relate to this? also what is something that you always thought was a problem with you and later found out it was your adhd? I thought I was just clumsy because I keep running into things but my therapist told me that it is apparently my ADHD so
greenVillage1753 profile picture
how to manage everyday life tasks especially studies
by greenVillage1753
Last post
 August 22nd
...See more my adhd is affecting my studies. i've made stupid decisions without thinking about consequences, the consequences that i've thought about before and after making those decisions. i regret them but anyways my main issue is that the uni i'm currently in has changed my studying pattern and its hard to focus now. i  was called a bright student but now i feel dumbest due to lack of focus and interest. ill be hyperfixated over other stuff than the important ones. i'd skip important tasks as i tend to forget things a lot, i'd forget to wash clothes for weeks or buy food sometimes. there is a lack of commitment and even willing to put hard efforts. i cant afford therapy now since i'm broke uni student and my expenses already high living in other city. wish there could be a solution. pomodoro alone dont help. there are too many things to manage when you live alone - food, expenses, 9-5 uni timings, practical records, project work, presentation. for someone too overwhelmed with social anxiety, lonliness, emotional exhaustion, this is a huge mess. 
turquoisePal8267 profile picture
ADHD Fiance broke off our engagement by text when over medicated on Elvanse
by turquoisePal8267
Last post
 August 19th
...See more Me and my ADHD Fiancé had a great relationship and he proposed in Italy in July 2025 and was extremely serious about us. In April this year he started on 10mg of Elvanse/Vyvanse with a 10mg increase every few weeks. When first starting he was very irritable and started acting odd around me like he didnt really want to be with me and said he had doubts about marriage, when I asked him why he could not actually give any reason. This behaviour soon disappeared however and he was fine again, when he was on 30mg and then 40mg he was happy, content, very romantic, buying me flowers, excited to get married, was making future plans for us, and was talking about selling one of his cars to help fund Wedding costs. He then went up to 50mg and within 3 weeks his behaviour got weird. First he was very hyper and manic, and then started getting irrationally angry. One time he got really nasty with me for apparently talking too loud when I was talking in a completely normal tone of voice and he was so nasty I cried. This was massively out of character. He then started acting very odd like turning up 2 hours late for different things, and blowing money on random unneeded stuff. I got angry with the reckless spending as we were saving for a Wedding and I was very disappointed in him for being very aggressive and rude to his mum. After me and his mum calmed down with him, things seemed fine again. But 2 days later after whatsapping him a wedding venue to potentially view he sent a horrible message saying we aren't going through with the Wedding as committing to each other would be a mistake, and he ended everything by text. This was 7 weeks ago. He has acted so strange in that time. Sometimes saying he feels very bad for letting me down, and other times being extremely cold acting like I was the cause of everything wrong in his life and the relationship meant nothing. Hes returned my things and shut our joint account but was crying over it and wanting to hug. He has only given very vague weird contradictory ever changing excuses for ending it, and its so weird and confusing. Hes also said hes focusing on his own life and career because hes deserves to be in a better position at work and he was quite cocky about it. He also doesn't get why Im hurt saying Ill find peace with it all one day and Ill meet someone else. Its bizarre behaviour. He lowered the dose to 40mg 2 weeks ago and asked to meet for coffee next week. I really dont know what to make of it all. But the medication is the only explanation I can think of. 
amusingJackfruit4010 profile picture
Helping ADHD people from a ADHD sufferer
by amusingJackfruit4010
Last post
 August 12th
...See more I have tried so many ADHD apps and want to understand why I am not able to stick with my routine. Is it the same for you? If yes, please mention your pain points
carefulEast6708 profile picture
I can't do anything right.
by carefulEast6708
Last post
 July 15th
...See more I am constantly screwing up. I can't even keep the time of a biweekly meeting straight. Even though it's on my calendar.  I hate this. 
SomeHope2022 profile picture
Diagnosed as an adult
by SomeHope2022
Last post
 July 5th
...See more Recently my therapist wanted to test me for autism and ADHD.  I had never considered that before. I am in my 40's I have always felt very different from people and always thought something was wrong with me.  When I started to look into how ADHD affects women I was surprised because it described me so well.  I think my way of coping was to become a quiet person, and develop all these control things so that my life was not chaotic but recently life has become too hard to keep up this way.  So I started to just let myself be but then it seemed to magnify all the behaviors I have tried to control.  I am really having trouble with time, I get distracted easily.  I find that movement is what I really need, I am always wanting to move.  I also found out I am not quiet.  I was being that way as a defense mechanism and that I might not be lazy after all.  This is all a lot to take in.  I feel overwhelmed with emotions right now.  The psychiatrist was pretty sure on the ADHD but wants me to get tested because he thinks it will help me.  Did any of you get diagnosed late in life.  Any help would be appreciated.  I feel like I am all over the place right now.  

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