Weekly Prompt #18: What are your main sources of stress in your life?
Hello everyone, I hope you are all being easy on yourself this week.
A couple of weeks ago we discussed: Are there any particular thoughts or worries that frequently occupy your mind? Thank you to all who participated and shared their thoughts for discussion. I enjoyed them. I hope you all did too. If you didn't share yours, please share them here and I look forward to reading and discussing them with you.
This week's prompt: What are your main sources of stress in your life?
This week I want us to reflect and explore this topic that can help us understand and explore the sources of our stress. Please take a moment to identify the areas that are causing you the most stress. Let's get started and all thoughts are welcomed!
Note: A helpful tip from @hope : "I recommend the book 'How to stop worrying and start living'. You can find the audiobook on YouTube"
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@0B I am sorry to hear you feel this way. It sounds like you're feeling stressed. You must be facing challenges to feel that way. What's contributing to that feeling?
if anyone wants to comment on this thread (any of the stories-I written about so far it's still a WIP
https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/Anxiety_2560/AnxietyfrompastissueswithclosefamilymembersDadsister_314072/?post=3372282
I hate it when Mom takes forever to get home. The service ended at 11am and it's almost 1pm now and Mom's sitll not home. Its not like they're researching any plays like they would normally be doing And also its not like Mom can get bean sprouts at the grocery store anymore so why is it taking Mom so long to get home when church ended at 11am?!!!
@Disneywoman It sounds really frustrating to worry about your mom being late home from church without explanation. I can understand feeling uncertain or anxious in this situation. Your care for your mom's wellbeing is very thoughtful.
@ASilentObserver My main sources of stress are work, pets, and school.
@Enthenia It sounds like you have a lot on your plate between work, pets, and school. That would be stressful for anyone. Which of those things do you find most challenging to manage right now?
@ASilentObserver I'm not exactly sure. The puppy is stressful because I want to get her categorized as a service animal but I can't get in to a doctor before December and I have to do my pet screening before that since my lease is due. Work is stressful because of the constant workload. School is stressful because we have to propose a computer security project to an existing company utilizing information that is hard to acquire. My first attempt needed a bit more detail so I have to resubmit it. I just don't know how to phrase things to get the results that I need.
@Enthenia It sounds like you have a lot on your plate right now between the puppy, work, and school. That amount of stress can really weigh on us. Your needs are important too. How are you managing to take care of yourself through all of this?
@ASilentObserver I am always overwhelmed. I used to do pictures (at least one a day) to help relax and I would do a bit of writing but with the puppy keeping me up half the night and then having to go to work (also playing with the puppy for pretty much the afternoon/evening after I come home from work), I don't have time for much of anything. I know I'm not getting enough sleep but it's just me and the two animals so I can't exactly request help from anyone. Everything falls onto my shoulders and I just have to deal with it.
I lost my temper early today but its just I was sick and tired of my Dad always doing the "sshing" motion whenever he thinks Mom is alseep and that means I can't wake her up for something like putting my hair up- i prefer for swim time to have my hair up in a bun for swim time because it means after I'm done swimming I can go back to my computer and put my headphone ontop of my head vs when Mom isn't here for swim time I have to put my shower hairclip on which means I have to take it out when I get out and take it back upstairs to the main bathroom because I can't put my headphones up on top of it.
@Disneywoman It sounds like getting your hair up for swim time is important to you, and not being able to do that your way is frustrating. What feelings come up for you when you're not able to follow your own routine?
@ASilentObserver the only time I'm angry about putting up my hair is when Dad is trying to let Mom have "quiet time" but can she really have quiet time when Dad's on his notebook in the family room and Mom wakes up too easily when I';m typing up here in the computer room before Mom wakes up on other days?
@Disneywoman This living arrangement sounds difficult to navigate at times. You caring about all finding a harmonious routine speaks to your thoughtfulness.
I'm just a bit *** off with my parents at the moment. Dad hates bird poop on the car but yet when I had a fit about bird poop being on the lader I needed to use to get in and out of the pool Dad said "its nothing".. um so I guess I should tell him he should just drive the car with bird poop on it because "its nothing"? But I had to yell at my parents when I came back into the house before i went to the pool because "Something was on the pool ladder" "Something was on the pool lader" "Poop is on the pool ladder" and then I finally screamed "BIRD POOL IS ON THE LADDER" but yet all they could hear until I SCREAMED AT them is ...on the pool ladder," ... .. on the pool ladder"
@Disneywoman It sounds really frustrating to feel like your concerns aren't being heard or taken seriously. I can understand why it would be upsetting to have bird poop on the ladder you need to use. Your safety and comfort are important. How are you feeling now about the situation with your parents?
@ASilentObserver Dad didn't even clean it off really so once I got *into* the pool, I had to stratch off the entire bird poop that was still there because Dad couldn't be bothered about it.
I'm really hate my parents double standards sometimes. I came home with Mom from a furneal of someone I thought I knew- didn't really recognize the woman in the casket but she was in the program. Well thing is Mom didn't like the fact I decide to "deal" with loading the dishwasher (I had empty the dishwasher before we left)- and told me to hurry up and get into the pool. And she said she could have dealted with it but 1)she needed to deal with laundry, and 2)she has to make supper tonight.
Yet from June through August I been going to the mall in Pickwick (not real name)with my friend (I would meet my friend there)-on Saturdays and yet when I would get home and sometimes I wouldn't get home until after 6pm and all I wanted to do is to get my behind into the pool and yet my parents insisted on me doing the dishwasher right then both empyting and reloading it
The other week Dad and I helped my friend get to her hair dressers in our town and afterwards I got her back on her bus and then went to the library to hang around a bit since I was going to get supper on the way home. I got home finally and after a quick swim in the pool I got my stuff together for supper and while I waited for my stuff to be reheated in the oven (Mom had been baking cookies that day)-I partly empty the dishwasher and after I had finished supper (beside a milkshake I had put into the freezer)-Dad demanded that I empty the sink because HE wanted to make ANOTHER batch of applescause that night and he couldn't be bothered to wait until 9pm that night for Mom to come home to deal with reloading the dishwasher like she said she would. And Dad said if I didn't do it, he would do it and I rather keep Dad away from the dishwasher with a 10foot pole because he doesn't know where anything goes in the dishwasher basically.
Like something new I had to tell him recently was that we can no longer part container lids in front of the upperrack due to it blocking something on the inside of the dishwasher.
@Disneywoman It sounds like the differing expectations from your parents are frustrating.
@ASilentObserver yeah not the only time "double standards".. They tell me "not to treat a time frame or lack of time frame like a doctor's appointment but yet if I'm late getting home (ie: Mall, or even from the resturant I got my food the other week)- they complain about me getting home late and yet they critize me for doing the same thing when they get home late?
I also hate their double standard about when I'm in pain. They know I have a HIGH TOLERaNCE FOR PAIN! They actually listen when I'm in pain with my ear but if its some other part of my body like my mouth or my leg they don't think its that big of a deal! Or they complain about the fact when they ask "where's the pain?" me "I don't know"
For instance I have two stories where I was in awful pain and my parents did nothing about it.
The one time I don't remember when it was about 5-6 years before Covid-I was having some kind of problems with my mouth like wisdom teeth were biting into my cheek or something and I was in so much pain I didn't really want to talk much and on Wednesday I went home after work and I was so sick of the pain by that point that after Mom left for work- that I had to google our denist and call the office and walked over there to be fit in.
I never had my leg looked at after I fell in Feb of 2020 but yet my leg was really swollen and painful for weeks afterwards but I couldn't really access a hosptial without my parents help and despite me constantly compaling about my leg the parents did nothing. So I'm not sure if there's any side effects from that fall and not getting it properly looked at.
I sometimes have to push Mom regarding my ear-to call my (now old) ear doctor - and I have a new one I'm going to be meeting in Nov I believe.
@Disneywoman I'm sorry to hear you've experienced such painful situations without receiving the support you needed. It sounds very frustrating to be in pain and feel others don't understand its severity or take it seriously. You deserve to have your pain addressed and cared for.
@ASilentObserver
The main sources I observed for me are, family and their needs, work stress, and financial situations specially in current times
@Sentimentss It sounds like you're experiencing stress from multiple responsibilities in your life and current times. You must feel overwhelmed at times with everything on your plate. You seem dedicated to supporting your family and doing well in your work. How does all of this make you feel?
Well who doesn't experience stress, in my opinion who says he/shee dont have stress. That one is more stressed. And its completely fine to feel stress but not letting that overcome you is an art , and witth grace of Almighty I have veen dealing it quite well :)
@Sentimentss It sounds like you've found a perspective on stress that helps you deal with it gracefully. You seem to have found strength and wisdom in relying on your faith during challenging times.
after work tomorrow after I hang out maybe at the library for a bit- I'm going to go to Harvey's to get some lunch. But I know I told my Mom I would only get a hot dog and a onion rings and pop but I also want to get a Skor milkshake but Mom will be pretty cross about that. But I'm adult and I should techinally be allowed to do what I want. I pretty sure the milkshake is going to be my last treat for awhile not counting my Fridays snacks.
My other problem is my parents want me to excerise more but at the same time they want me to eat less and yet I know the more I excerise the more hungrier I get and my Dad also wants me to do strenght exceries to make me more atheltic to be able to shoot more properly.
@Disneywoman It sounds like you have a lot on your mind weighing different priorities and expectations. What feelings are you most aware of in this situation?
@ASilentObserver grumpy, stressed, exhausted if the last one can be an emotion
@Disneywoman It sounds like you've been feeling overwhelmed lately. You must have been pushing yourself quite a bit to get to this point. How have you been coping so far in taking care of yourself during this challenging time?
@ASilentObserver little treats like the milkshake. And espeically I need the extra engery for grocery shopping days because shopping with my Dad is basically like trying to shop with a Muggle Hagrid basically (have to take 5 steps to Dad's 2 steps simliar to how its described in the Harry Potter books how Harry keeps up with Hagrid)
@Disneywoman It sounds like grocery shopping with your Dad can be quite the energetic experience. You must care deeply for your father to join him on these trips.
@ASilentObserver its leftover from me having to help him 2 years ago when he has sugeryial on his arm so he wasn't suppose to lift anything heavy for awhile. Hey I get coffee and cereal/oatmeal and toast with PB for breakfast out of helping w/ Dad.
But I do kind of wish that *before* Dad sugery in 2021 that my parents had sat me down and told me that "for a little awhile" I would need to help Dad out with shopping.
I didn't know until the day or two days before the very first shopping day and I was under the impression that it was a one time thing only and then the next week after Mom and I came home from the mall I learned i was suppose to help again. It was a litereally bombshell (sorry if I'm offensive to anyone) on me.
