Weekly Prompt #3: Can loneliness change the person that you are?

@ASilentObserver

I work in human services, as a case manager, which can fall in health care. I work at a non-profit and in my role I do outreach for homeless members of the community. My organization also has a "Connectedness" program because they saw a need in the pandemic. Someone called the office and said they hadn't spoken to another human in over 2 weeks and from that we grew a connectedness program where volunteers call members of the community on a weekly or biweekly schedule just to have conversations with people who sign up for the program. It's a cool program.

As far as the question. I don't know if I believe loneliness changes a person's personality, but I do believe that maybe it changes your perception of who/what you are in society. I think that loneliness can definitely cause us to go inward and in that inward may be we discover ourselves more, for both the better and for the worse. I think when we have time alone it allows us to get to know ourselves more personally, but when we are lonely and isolated maybe we start to doubt our worth and our value more which may cause us to even further withdraw.

I don't know if that explanation makes sense. I see it as a more temporary personality change, I guess where, but also as an opportunity to learn who we are, and so when we are no longer isolated/lonely, others may think we've "changed" but rather we've just learned to be more true to ourselves.

Loneliness is awful and I don't wish it on anyone.

@ASilentObserver I think it can definitely impact who you are, depending on how long you experience loneliness and if you have support around you. It's important to try and get the help you need so that you aren't struggling too long. There is always help out there and we are never truly alone! 💖

@ASilentObserver

I think it is a gray spot for me as it depends on the person. For me, I do think loneliness can change someone but if it be good or bad that is hard. I don't like the idea of being lonely for a long period of time but for some they like it.

As a person suffering from agoraphobia... which developed from chronic isolation beginning a couple of years before the pandemic, I am here to say without a shred of hesitation, the answer to this is YES. Absolutely and 100% it can and does.

There is a difference though, between being lonely, and alone. I'm not referring to the little boughts of lonely here and there. But for anyone suffering abuse and forced isolation, where options for having a support structure- there is no doubt about it.

You will question everything, including yourself, and your own thoughts, opinions, and perception. You won't know what's up from down or real from imagined. And you will lose yourself. My identity is gone. I feel like I can't even remember what it was like remembering that I had one. I am an empty human body of a shell of a being that most days I don't even feel has a resemblance to a person. It was stolen from me.

I never wish another person on the planet ever have to suffer through what I am still to this day struggling with.

Good topic, by the way. I hope everyone enjoys their holiday. Outside of solitude. Take care of yourself. And each other.

I think it can, well I'm a victim of loneliness. I've been isolated for 4years and I cannot even recognize myself and understand who I am. Before I feel like I knew who I was and now I just feel lost

@ASilentObserver

Physical: wrinkles, scars and a skin condition from emotionally eating cookies

Mental: hard on myself, think the same critical thoughts day in day out and ill af

Emotional: can't think straight, cry or become angry quickly and will isolate

Saying this is all from loneliness is arguable and debatable as scientifically we don't have enough data to make a fully informed conclusion and socially and culturally we are still too divided to ever come to a conclusive and evolved agreement about anything anyway so, excuse me while I hunt down some cookies.

@ASilentObserver Loneliness can certainly have a significant impact on a person's mental and emotional well-being, and it can lead to changes in their behavior and personality. When someone is feeling lonely, they may become more withdrawn and less engaged with others, which can further exacerbate feelings of isolation and sadness. I encourage you to reach out to others for support, whether it be a friend, family member, or mental health professional. Remember that you are not alone in your experiences, and there are people who care about you and want to help you feel better.

I think it can, yes. But those changes don't necessarily have to be bad ones, though that is often the case.

If you are a social butterfly then yeah, loneliness won't help you...especially if you're lonely for an extended period of time. Likely consequences would be depression, or at least anomie, listlessness, etc. But loneliness can also be a precursor to renewed focus. I've been solitary by nature for years, but feeling lonely was quite rare for me. Until recently, that is. It made me realize that while I prefer to do things on my own, I cannot exist completely independently of everyone. No human being can. We're not sea anemones or cacti, with no sociality whatsoever. So getting out & seeing if I can find a friend or two is something I'm trying for this year, despite the inevitable risks & irritations it will bring. There has to be someone with whom I can get along with & who uses his/her head as more than just a hat rack somewhere...

Yes.

I spent most of my childhood not only alone and some periods feeling lonely. I didn't have many friends, my parents overprotected me and so I never went to many parties or events with friends. I was always a quiet girl and shy. It didn't help that all my brothers and sisters are 10+ years older than me. They loved me, but they are not the same as a friend I would love to have had as a kid. As a result, I never experienced many basic emotions, situations and feelings. I just never had to deal with them.

Now as an adult... I spent a lot of time believing my childhood had just been that way and I am just an introvert. But with time, I have become more outspoken, I am still an introvert, but I speak my mind and share my ideas. Then I started to remember how as a kid I would actually spend hours by myself in my mom's garden with nothing but my thoughts. I'm pretty sure this is how my horrible habit of ruminating, making up stories, and self judgment began. I just had way to much time to think....overthink...and feeling the need for a friend.

I am really mad at my childhood because I can see that because of my loneliness I never developed a personality or social skills. And now I'm stuck with the baggage of having to figure it out this late in the game. I'm ok, I'm working on it, but my ruminating pairs up with my anxiety and my day can get ruined pretty quickly at times and it makes me really sad and feel like there is no hope for me to overcome these issues. It's ok. I'm still trying

@ASilentObserver

Warning- It may trigger some people.

Yes, loneliness can change a person. It may have a significant impact on one person but not on the other. Some people may fall into depression or become introverts. Loneliness affected me a lot, and it's just how the person reacts to it. My example may be a bit cliche, but when some drama happened, I was utterly lonely. No friends at all. I had already listened to BTS, but I realised I was lonely during that period of my life. So, I actively participated in being ARMY (like watching videos and getting to know more)

It sometimes helps, and sometimes it doesn't. In my case, it helped.

Conclusion: Loneliness can change a person, but it depends on their personality. Thanks for reading.