Climbing the Walls
I feel restless and anxious and worried and bored, and need both change, and security and stability, and rest, and movement, and thinking, and not thinking… My emotions and thoughts are both everywhere and nowhere, feeling and numb. I’m a little bundle of contradictions. I need to do something new, and also to just stare at nothing and think zero thoughts. I’m restless and overwhelmed and yet exhausted, but I need to move… Been there? Talk to me!
I’d love some comfort and distraction and photos and GIFs and even unrelated conversations, book recommendations and Netflix choices pictures of puppies and activity ideas and something to distract me from wanting to binge on food, something to stop me from worrying and thinking, please. Anything to get me out of this weird headspace… Thank you!
@ShadowFaerie @unassumingEyes @Sunisshiningandsoareyou @sadcat13 @Amanda84 @goldenduckling @mytwistedsoul @Tinywhisper11 @LovemyMoonflowers @GreenLime3141 @7Bear7 @Phoenixthepoised @Torean @GentleHealingInitiative @cyanessence @YourCaringConfidant @CaringEzra @NobleSeeker @fossilfellow @BastionKnight @trueconfidant123 @safeplace288 @lovingCat6978 @reservedOwl321 @dapperNest2125 @Creamyyy @naturesbeauty1234 @bubbleSummer9800 @warmheartedHuman836 @Mansbestfriend @Paliloveyourself @Magicpawsoffuture @SelfCareMatters @TovaCares76 @sabeyesofblue3535 @AiluraTheCat @charmingApple8098 @luvArisu @BlueDarkAurora @curiousbookishness @sympatheticPlace3743 @musawva @KindleMissie @WellsFiction @Angelanj @SlappyMcGee @SunshineJazz @LexListens2025 @Heather225 @agreeableSkies9889 @HopeAura
I’m adding a taglist to start, but this post is open to absolutely everyone! <3
Totally feel the same. Super bored and anxious. I love having security and safety but I also love people and want to do new fun things. Sorry you feel that way. I know it sucks 😞 sending love hopefully it gets better soon ❤️❤️ ❤️
I’m here!!! Let me un-bore you lol. Want a task/mini-project?? <3
Why anxious?
I'm anxious about literally everything new and get panic attacks. I want to be able to do more but it's hard and I never feel happy no matter what I do. I feel so overwhelmed all the time and the joy I have for things is always short lived
Do you know what’s causing the anxiety and sadness?
Maybe tiny steps?
The anxiety is partly from being overstimulated, partly from my dad, and partly because of my gender identity. My dad made a really homophobic joke yesterday that really hurt my feelings. I feel so unbearably alone right now honestly. I'm so confused and my family being terrible hasn't helped
What’s overstimulating you?
How do you think they’d react once you come out to them?
We’re here for you <3
Everything... I guess not everything but being in public with a lot of sound and at home with my family who are very loud is hard for me.
I don't know. I told my mom I think I might be asexual but I feel like I'm lying. I don't know... I might just be gay... I just had an overwhelming feeling to let it be known that I'm LGBT and told her the sexuality I thought would be easier to accept... I told her I was confused still... She reacted good to it but also she doesn't really view it as a sin so idk. And um also still really confused about my gender. I don't know how my dad would react... He says slurs a lot and is extremely controlling... I feel like he's mentally abusive... Idk what to do... It hurts so bad to hear him use that language... He's also threatened to kill my cat before because he thought it was funny? I feel really scared... Idk what to do.
Sounds like sensory overload.
Can you clarify something for me? I’ve been wondering about this for awhile. If you’re a trans woman, but like women, does that make you gay or straight? Or something else? That confuses me. Does gay refer to liking the sex you were assigned at birth, or does it refer to liking the trans gender you’ve become (yes, I know I said that so wrong, but I know you get what I mean lol. Terminology is not my strong point lol)?
Can you move out?
Why would he threaten your cat???
I don't know honestly... I mean... I guess technically straight... But currently I am living as a guy so idk what it makes me honestly... I have very confusing feelings rn.
I don't know... I'm scared... I don't think I could handle living alone. I have some money saved but my options are really limited. I've looked into different resources and I might be able to get away but I'm afraid about change and my family is so controlling and my anxiety is so bad that I don't if I could handle it. I'm already exhausted and I have no emotional support or friends to help me. I feel really hopeless
Trigger warning btw sorry I guess this is dark
Idk... I think he thought it was funny???? My cat can be a little mean if you catch him at the wrong time but my dad started to say that he wanted to kill him a lot and said it in really gory detail that made me sad and afraid that he'd actually do it. My brother also used to threaten me and my sister with knifes and say he wanted to kill us though he hasn't for a couple of years but I'm still scared tbh. My family never really cared much about it or took it seriously. I feel like my family is so messed up. I'm half sure my uncle is secretly attracted to men because he makes really uncomfortable gay jokes a lot and he's grabbed my butt before. I don't know how those people would react if I said I feel like a girl on the inside. I feel like melting 😞 I was feeling a little bit better until my dad decided to start throwing around slurs again and really hurtful things.
My therapist has been trying to help me be more independent but it's why harder than I ever thought it could be. I struggled to even make a door dash order... I'm so down bad it's sad. I want to do better. I want to have a better life.... I'm seriously thinking about my future and what I want and I can't see it being a reality.... I don't know.... I just hope it gets better
It’s ok. I Can imagine how hard it is. hugs <3
Have you looked into support groups? Some are virtual <3
You family sounds dysfunctional and abusive.
Independence is hard for me too.
You got this. Pick one TINY step first. Tell me what it is <3
❤️
I have but I'm honestly scared to try one.
I want to try and plan a consultation with an eye specialist so I guess that's what I want to do next but phone calls are scary for me.
They’re scary for me too. <3
Ok, do what I do. Pair it with something you REALLY love! I put mine on speaker and drew while I was on the phone. It was a lot of being on hold anyway lol! Do that today <3
@jesusredeemedme2425
Awwwww da puppy!!! <3
I love puppies!!!
Me too! <3
@jesusredeemedme2425 first of all huggles lovely friends, cozy warmest one sending your way 🤗💖💖💖
Do you like butterflies or the process of becoming butterfly something?
Well, I recently found a caterpillar in the peas while I was sorting out my vegetables 😂 and then I thought..... 'oooh let's adopt this buddy till it forms the feathers like butterfly' 🤔😆 but then the other side of my brain said... 'just feed it to the java babies, they haven't gotten any nutrition of worms since their born day' 🙄😂 I am still uncertain what to do 🤣 but the caterpillar is living good and healthy as well as the java babies 😂😂😂
Now thats something fun to do🤭it does require alot of patience tho but I know you could be patient and not feed it to the java babies👻 and phew you dont have a brother like i have.he would stomp on it instantly or feed it to the chickens😅
@curiousbookishness ohhh 😱😱😱 that sounds traumatizingg 🤣🤣🤣 yess whatt a relieve I don't have a brother 😂😂😂 If I would have one, he would have to get smackedd by me then go say sorry to the baby butterfly 🤣🤣🤣
And it would be to late for the sorry😭✌
@curiousbookishness ommmgggiesss, yesss 😭😂
Protec da baby butterfly at all costs! <3
@jesusredeemedme2425 yesss on it!! 😃💛🙌
@jesusredeemedme2425
If you're into toxic relationship drama then I highly recommend you watching Tell Me Lies on Hulu. Super addictive.
Open When by Dr Julie Smith is one of the best books I've ever read on psychology.
Have you ever tried freezing coca cola or orange juice in ice lolly moulds? Loved them as a kid. It's an exhilarating experience.
Oh my god i freeze every drink in its bottle annd i am not a kid anymore😭✌ my father scolds me on it but the result is to rewarding to let it go🤤And i just choughed 😳.
And i want that pocket size penguin for exams
@curiousbookishness
Haha. I did accidentally freeze the coke bottle but I don't really make ice lollies now. I rather buy them from the store. More convenient but equally rewarding experience.
Listen to your dad and don't fall sick please!
Here's some cute penguin motivation for your upcoming exam. Best wishes!
Ice lolis arent fizzy 😳 qnd i dont freeze them completly but something like a slushie🤤 i get a caugh alitle but i am not going to be in trouble ...much😅
and thanks for the cute penguin👻
@trueconfidant123 did it with orange juice, 10/10 wld recommend. Also watermelon, and mango juice. Long as its cold lol 😌🫡
@unassumingEyes
It's so yum. I'm craving one now.
@jesusredeemedme2425
First of all: hugs if okay 🤍
Second of all, i can share poems i like, because thats my specialty lol. Or song lyrics? Or words that resonate? Its all poetry to me xD heres one, from a song i think?
Ring the bells that still can ring.
Forget your perfect offering.
There is a crack in everything.
That's how the light gets in.
- Leonard Cohen
You never have to ask! *bigggg bear hugs* <3
@jesusredeemedme2425
Da cute lil tippy taps <3
"I dont see any light at the end of the tunnel"
Maybe it's just very long, and you just need to keep your already strong body strong.
Maybe you dont have your OWN lights own, you see nothing even if its there.
Maybe your not looking while driving, to see your healing.
Maybe the cars around you have dimmed their lights, making you think its never will be bright.
Maybe your front glass are scratched, and you are looking through someone's else distorted perspective.
So many possibilities, and yet your mind, because it is so hurt, only sees "there is no light at the end" while there could be many many more.
Dont lose hope, not when so much more could be happening that made you hopless.
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🚐 🌈
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The only way I get peace is to write it out of me, which I need to do in a few moments. In the meantime though....
Q. Why was the Egyptian boy confused?
plays Taps for your broken nail :(
@jesusredeemedme2425
@Amanda84 Coochy coo. Don't eat me 😩
@ScrabbleBrain
I promise, I'm all cuteness and light 😁
@Amanda84 and mayhem and destruction but that's the beautiful thing about you...... Mixture of divaesqueness 🧞♀️
@ScrabbleBrain
@Amanda84 You don't even words and already laughing 😍😂