***TW*** Please Let Me Feel…
When I say that all men are disgusting and evil, please let me. I know that it’s not true. I have (and have had) many amazing male friends.
But when you’ve spent your life dealing with DV and bullying and various kinds of abuse… You’re blinded to that.
All you see is the men who want to use and hurt you.
I know good guys exist.
But I can’t feel it.
All I know is hurt and pain. And internally cringing around men, waiting for the blows to land.
Please don’t scold me for being afraid of men.
Acknowledge that I have PTSD and I’ve spent my entire life being abused.
I have a REASON to fear and hate men.
Because they’ve abused me for 30+ years.
When you tell me not to feel what I feel, to say what I believe…
You’re telling me that my fears and beliefs don’t matter.
That my experiences are null and void.
That my pain can be brushed off with a single sentence.
I’ve been hit. Threatened. Abused. Had a man attempt to injure me. Had men try to force me to do things I didn’t want to do.
And you negate my fear.
You should be ashamed. Not acknowledging and understanding a lifetime of fear and shame and PTSD.
You hurt me every time you say that.
Please stop.
Let me feel and express my emotions and begin to heal.
I know not every man is dangerous.
But I don’t know WHICH men.
And cower daily anticipating blows that never come, because of the men who once put their hands on me.
I believe love doesn’t exist because men have used me for their own pleasures, disregarded my humanity and my autonomy and my boundaries, insulted my body, degraded me.
And you tell me it’s not ok to feel this way.
Shame on you.
@jesusredeemedme2425
Listening just as you are without judgement and here for you always 🩷
Awww thank you <3
@jesusredeemedme2425
@jesusredeemedme2425 ❤️❤️
Im so sorry Kiara people have been telling you this....
Ive actually heard it all my life too.... that im being hateful when im sharing stuff about men who were bad.... also been told im weak and useless for feeling sad ... people dont understand mental health... they give more abuse by making these comments .... forgive them ... you make a wonderful point of creating awareness on how to offer support....
I love how you express by the way... if it wasnt for you being vulnerable and revealing so many shades of your self, I wouldnt have plucked courage to the same... love ð©·
@jesusredeemedme2425
@jesusredeemedme2425
this is how your feeling. And that’s alright! I hear you!!! let it out girl!!! name the emotion. name how it feels in your body.
You are deserving of kindness
You are deserving of your boundaries
You deserve to be heard
You deserve a kind, safe love
💗
@jesusredeemedme2425
I hear you. 💞
You have your reasons and they are so so valid. It is good that you let it all out - because it really is just so disrespectful to downplay your feelings and horrible experiences. You are valid and so are your feelings.
Wishing you the best ❤️🩹🌸
Don't worry...it's not ur fault to think about it like that....
@jesusredeemedme2425
Kiara...!!! i wish i could hug n make feel better now...!! 💓
I feel every single word's of u...!! cus, I've been in ur shoes for real n real:(
ngl.. I've bad impression on men's tho... I'm just socializing with men's only here in Cups:( I'm terrified of em' all TBH.
I never let this out of me but I just share it now... I'm sexually abused as a kid:( even I've been sexually abused by my maternal Grandfather n my cousin brother:(
I understand when u said "don't tell me all the men's are same" i see u..!! i do know that not men's are same but our wound is also deep n real.
I felt the same as u... still suffering 😞.
Hope we soon feel ease 🍀 hope u find a man who u can find true peace there:) 💞
I love you so much, Kiara 💗 i wish things be better for u. you deserve all kinda of love n Embrace in the world 💕.
Hug u closer to my heart 🌸
I’m so sorry :’(
I love you more <3
@jesusredeemedme2425
Love u infinite <3😊💕
Love you to the moon and back <3
@jesusredeemedme2425
I am so sorry, your emotions are valid, I pray that you get strength, I pray that you meet good and kind souls, I pray that your wounds heal and your story gets heard. I pray for your happiness. Once again, i am so sorry you had such experience.
I’m sorry you’ve had to endure this. Stand your ground and take control of your life and your body. May God Bless you and heal you. 🤗