Tired....

@limegreenHuman9402 sending lots of love to you! 💝 I know you will get through this🤍 Dont give up!❤️Remember You're Awesome! <3

@limegreenHuman9402 Talking about your feelings is considered healthy. It helps you process them and lowers stress. Sometimes the people that we might try to share these things with might not be equipped to hear what we're telling them. That's ok. There are better ways for them to say they can't than to say you're victimizing yourself or blackmailing others. 

It sounds to me that you are surrounded by narcissistic people who don't trust anyone since they know they themselves are not trustworthy. They're always digging to figure out in what way they are being scammed financially or emotionally and are usually wrong. Their problem is the opposite of yours: they believe kindness is transactional while you do it because it feels good and is therefore the right thing to do. It's not your job to explain to anyone why they're wrong and it's not often even successful for literally anyone on Earth. So you cansay things like "Interesting" or "I'm sorry it comes across that way" and then end the conversation by simply not saying anything else. You can look up "gray rocking." One of my favorite things to keep in mind is that saying "yeah" doesn't have to mean you agree, but that since people interpret it that way, it gets you off the hook without conflict. Good luck getting away from these people. Hold your boundaries!

@limegreenHuman9402 I am really sorry you are experiencing that, please know that you are not a bad person. Wanting to defend yourself is completely normal and humane, every person feels the need to do that and it is our right. Sadly this is a form of gaslighting, they are using gaslighting in order to shift the conversation. Your feelings are important and valid, you are not hurting anyone nor anything by sharing them. Please know that the 7 cups community is here for you and you deserve to have people in your life who care about you. Please love yourself, you deserve it and know you can message me if you need someone to support you or to listen to you. 

@limegreenHuman9402 Setting boundaries is difficult but always necessary. Your boundaries are where you begin to feel uncomfortable. The most important thing is that you know you're not a bad person and that you're not acting in bad faith. You should be proud of that. You can't control what others think of you, but you can control what you think of yourself. You're a very empathetic person, and that's a great quality.

I’m feeling every word, I speak up for myself and he bashes me down he has the upper hand. We are victims it needs to be said out loads or no one will take us serious until it’s too late.

I hope you'll forgive my directness, but saying there's no value in kindness is your first problem. There is value, especially considering you take pride in being as such. There's value in it to you & that's all that should matter.

People can't understand your kindness & thats not for you to defend. They can either accept it or not. You just have to accept that. Despite your methods to show who you are, they still choose to say you aren't bc thats what they choose to believe. That has nothing to do with you & everything to do with them.

If someone said the sky was orange when it is obviously blue, will you waste time trying to prove that the sky is blue? Will you compare the blue sky to blue color swatches on your phone? Have professionals present scientific evidence of what is the color blue? Find their closest friends & have them agree & state that the sky is in fact blue? I would hope not.

Treat your truth the same way.

(Time can be much better spent in finding enjoyment in life btw)

There is nothing wrong with speaking your truth or being a kind individual. If someone refuses to accept either, accept that they do not value it. Do you want to fight to obtain value from those who do not accept your words? Or would you prefer to value yourself & possibly find others along the way who do appreciate you as you are?

Speaking your truth is great for getting things off your chest, & if that is what you feel you must do, do so. Don't ever stop living your truth bc it makes others uncomfortable though.

As for your questions, theres no one right approach to deal with these things. You have to navigate life & find what works for you. Noone can live your choices for you. Think on the outcomes of your actions before acting. Look at the patterns that surround you & debate if you're content with them. If not, experiment with changing them. As for where can you go? What brings you peace & joy? Go there.

Wishing you peace & healing.

@limegreenHuman9402 What comes to mind for this situation, is hurt people hurt people. If you're kindness isn't perceived or valued, that's their problem. I can't say you can stop people from reacting these ways, in fact you shouldn't. Trying to control the outcome is manipulation in a way right? I say keep being kind, set boundaries, and don't buy into their mental gymnastics.
I think sometimes getting the angry rise out of you could be a way to make you seem the bad guy, stay strong friend! And thank you for being a kind person! <3

I feel your pain. That saying that nice people finish last seems to resonate some truth in it. You have every right to feel the way you do and standup for who you believe you are. If people can’t have enough basic respect to understand you have feelings that need to be heard, maybe you have the wrong people in your life. Don’t let this get to you. Believe in you and as long as you keep true to yourself in you belief that you are a good person you have no reason to let other people get to you.