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30 Years Today, And I Choose to Speak

User Profile: LopaConnect
LopaConnect February 27th

Today, I complete 30 years of marriage.

Yes, I am divorced. And today, I want to speak about what life truly is.

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I got married 30 years ago and divorced 10 years later. My son was just 8 then; today, he is 28. What followed was not just separation… it was a long social trial.

At 30, I was looked at as if I had committed a mistake. As if divorce must mean something was wrong with me. People didn’t ask directly; they searched. They looked at my toe rings, my bangles, my sindoor… trying to decode my marital status. And I, so young then, felt awkward saying that 8-letter word, “divorced.”

My little 8-year-old son once told me,
“Mama, why say divorced? Just say Papa is in another city for business.”
At just 8 years old, he guided me with a maturity beyond his age.
He comforted me in my lowest moments, more than a son, he became my friend, my support, my quiet strength.

But the dilemma did not end there.
A widow is often met with sympathy.
A divorcee is often met with judgment.

From 30 to 50, it took me years to say without hesitation. Yes, I am divorced.
Today, I feel nothing when I say it. No shame. No discomfort. Only truth.
The hardest moments were not the legal papers.
They were the social ones.

Going to parties and wondering,
With whom will I go?
Where do I stand?
Whom do I mingle with?
Group photos were the toughest. I loved being included. I loved belonging. Yet sometimes I was told to wait “Let the complete family take one first.” I would step back. My son disliked photos, and I would quietly watch others pose.
In those small moments, I felt left out.
As if I needed a husband beside me to deserve a frame.

But life has a way of healing you.
God gave me friends. Real friends.
Slowly, I rebuilt myself. I saw strength in my mother, how she found joy in serving, in clicking pictures for others, in being content. I learned from her.

Today, I happily take photographs for everyone.
And I feel complete.
I have come too far to grieve what I lost.
Instead, I celebrate what I built.

Life is not a bed of roses. It is tough. Very tough.
But if you surround yourself with hobbies, good people, good friends, and good hearts, life becomes lighter.

Today, on completing 30 years of that chapter of my life, I stand peaceful.
Not as someone incomplete.
Not as someone judged.
But as someone fulfilled.

I am content with what I have achieved.
And deeply grateful to all of you, young and old, who walked with me, supported me, and loved me through the journey.

With love.
Always. 


30
User Profile: moonwitgirl
moonwitgirl March 3rd

@LopaConnect

Thank you for sharing your story. You have come a long way to be able to finally speak up about your life. Your journey as a single mother is truly inspiring. Despite facing all the hardships and judgments, you honourably stand tall and whole for yourself and your son. Keep shining Lopa <3

1 reply
User Profile: LopaConnect
LopaConnect OP March 3rd

Thank you so much. It means a lot. Grateful for everything. ðª·

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User Profile: sociableDrum9946
sociableDrum9946 March 3rd

I know this is supposed to be sensitive but I will tell you my funny story. Btw, I completed 4 yrs to my divorce today. When people hear the word "divorced" they feel sad or sorry for me. And I am unflinched. Funny is that I kinda console people. Oh it's ok! I am chill.

1 reply
User Profile: LopaConnect
LopaConnect OP March 3rd

True. Life wasn't the same 30 years back. Things are very easy these days. I am happy for you. God bless you. 💞

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User Profile: HopefulHeartWhispers

You are doing great keep it up and if you need a listener feel free to reach out anytime ❤️

You are loved and important

User Profile: Vishnu1376
Vishnu1376 March 4th

Applicate you took nd bold descion otherwise many of them keep thinking nd regretting

User Profile: inesllorens
inesllorens March 9th

@LopaConnect This is so inspiring! Thank you so much for sharing!

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