Daily Mindfulness Check-In October 19, 2022
What question(s) did you always want to ask about mindfulness? We can try to answer as best we can.
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@amiablePeace77
I don't understand why I find it so hard to be present and focused on my breathing, Is it because I can't be still, or because my thoughts are all over the place?
@scarletPear1945
Scarlet, I find when my thoughts are all over the place and I feel not being able to focus on my breath I put one hand one my belly and the other hand on my heart to feel the breath coming in and leaving the body. If that does not help to calm myself I would try a walking meditation, tai chi or qigong, so something with movement. That can be easier.
@amiablePeace77
A walking meditation. Now that's something I need to look into. Thanks.
How best to keep practicing when you feel good and aren’t struggling, in order to struggle and suffer less when pain arises? I guess it’s a question of how to motivate practice, and be consistent every day, because this keeps proving to be a challenge for me
@ThadSterling
Good question and good point ThadSterling! A lot is about the motivation. Sorry that you're struggling with it but many people do particularly in the beginning. When you have to force yourself to practise and approach the practise with a certain expectation it will be hard. I find when I develop the desire to practise it's much easier. Some days I do not feel like sitting down for a long time so I will use informal meditation, qigong, yoga or tai chi. Walking meditation can also be a great way to practise. Does this answer your question?
@amiablePeace77
Is it possible to live in a constant state of mindfulness?
When is it mindfulness not good to practice?
@Dannc7c
Another good question. Dann I find it hard to be in a constant state of mindfulness since our minds are made to wander and pick up any triggers. Mindfulness can help us to calm the mind, allow it briefly to check what is happening around us and come back to a state of calmness.
I personally do not see any situation where mindfulness would not be good to practise. Even in an emergency situation a mindful response can prevent much damage.
@amiablePeace77 great post! I hosted a seminar and Huddle on Mindfulness and enjoy exploring it every day.
One question from reflecting on your question: How long does Mindfulness take for benefits like mental strength to be apparent?
@SoulfullyAButterfly
That is a good but also tough question in my view since it depends for example on the mental health state of a person and the effort one puts in to practise. I believe changes are taking place reasonably fast but often not as apparent as one would like. If someone stays with a regular practise that is a sign of developing mental strength to me.
Some benefits are apparent immediately with many people like feeling in discomfort before a practise and feeling more at ease after a practise.
@amiablePeace77, @soulfulbuttrly
This was a useful question and answer for me. I'm frequently impatient for the results and wondering "when?" And thus, is it worth the investment?
I have a follow up question. What do you consider "mental strength"? How would someone recognise they are developing it?
@Clio9876
To me mental strength includes how someone can deal with challenges, how fast they bounce back from "down-falls", that they can laugh about themselves when making a mistake, have self confidence, connected to one's feelings, faith in the future and in general a positive outlook on life. One way to recognize it to see how fast they bounce back from down-falls.
How can you better focus on mindfulness in stressful situations?
@MyPrettyPony
I believe regular practise of mindfulness will make it easier to automatically change to a mindful mindset from a stressful or anxious one. Something I find helpful is to use the senses to get out of the stories in our head, clapping the hands is another way to get back to the moment as well as using mantras like "I will get through this". This is to overcome the stressful situation in the moment but mindfulness helps as well to look at the root causing the stress.
@amiablePeace77
How can mindfulness be helpful in overcoming temptations such as lust or overeating or what have you?
@LovingPeacefulHeart
Lust and overeating can occur when people try to compensate for something that is missing in their lives. Mindfulness can help to become aware of the urge when it arises, help to let is pass and explore the root of it. Mindfulness urge surfing can be very helpful.
@amiablePeace77 thank you! I think this is a very helpful skill. It takes strength to not always give in to urges.
@amiablePeace77
Do you think it's possible to practice mindfulness 'too much'?
I've always found it to be a very "self-focused" activity, and wonder if one could accidentally neglect the needs of other people by focusing too much on themselves while being 'in the moment'. Perhaps it depends on the situation, but that tends to be my biggest criticism of the mindfulness movement. I wanted to get some perspectives on that. Thanks :)
@cafedaydreams
I wonder about this a lot too. Where is the balance between meeting your own needs and meeting the needs of others? Am I being selfish?
But then I look at all the time and effort someone like @amiablePeace is giving to help others, and wonder where they find the time and strength. Maybe there is truth in the saying that you can better meet the needs of others, when you have met the needs of yourself. Or maybe there is some other secret they are not telling us.
If mindfulness is selfish, could we expect that people who practice mindfulness might find relationships difficult? I don't know, but maybe a interesting question is what proportion of people who practice mindfulness are single or in successful long term relationships relative to the rest of the population? Or, how do the children of parents who practice mindfulness, rate their life satisfaction relative to children of parents who don't? So many interesting questions 🤔
Well, that led to an interesting and helpful Google rabbit hole.
@Clio9876
It is not selfish to put your needs first when needed. It is careless and selfish not to do it and suffer, become irritable and spread negative vibes. When I feel strong I can put my needs on "hold". When I have urgent needs which need to be fulfilled to function in a healthy way I need to put my needs first. In my view mindfulness helps in general with interacting with people but also in good or not so good relationships by focusing on what is there and being grateful for it, reducing expectations and sometimes understand that change is inevitable. I also believe parents who practise mindfulness often have more calm and inner strength to deal with parenting challenges and kids learn valuable tools to deal with challenges in childhood but also lateron as adults.
I strongly believe mindfulness increases life satisfaction and consequently supports mental, emotional and physical health.
@cafedaydreams
What I understand about mindfulness is to be self aware, noticing what it going on inside of me (thoughts, feelings) but also what is happening around me (does someone need help, is there any danger for me or others I can help to prevent). These are only a few examples, since mindfulness refers to everything, how we eat, how we talk to others (making sure not to offend other people, not to react impulsively when triggered) and so much more. To me it's a kind of "love story" between us and the world - it's not about ourselves only, it's about what impact we make to the inside and outside world.
@amiablePeace77
Thanks for the response! I suppose I see what you're saying. I guess I associate mindfulness a lot with meditation (or how meditation is practiced and glorified in my country) even though they're technically two different things. I've read instances of people taking meditation to an extreme sense and either losing their sense of self or isolating themselves away from others. My question was just a thought about if that could happen with mindfulness as well, that's all. Mindfulness being more about a general state of awareness to help us deal with the world and associate with others makes it seem much more inviting.
I find it difficult to explain to others what mindfulness is about when I want to help them to use it. How do you describe it.? Thanks
@xzy1000
Thanks for your question. Here are some points:
Mindfulness is about becoming aware of my thoughts and feelings, not judging them, being able to observe them within clinging to them unless they serve a positive purpose (a good idea for work for example), letting them pass.
I like this example:
When I eat my lunch, I know I'm eating, I smell and taste the food, each bite until my plate is empty - mindfulness
When I sit in front of the tv, focus on a movie, "shovel down" my food, not even realizing I'm eating it and all over sudden realize the plate is empty - mindlessness
Another example is a jar filled with water and mud. You shake it and it is all cloudy (your anxious mind), you wait until the mud is settled, the water is clear (your calm mind).
