How do you "mindfully" handle rejection?
Live your life for you not for anyone else. Dont let the fear of being judged, rejected or disliked stop you from being yourself. ~Sonya Parker
"What did I do wrong?" or "Why don't they want to talk to me no more?" or "I'm just not worth it to anyone" I bet hearing these words make you feel you not someone good enough-right? As unpleasant as "rejection" is IT'S PART OF LIFE, and even me and mine is not exception. As time went by and I had kids and allowed myself to engage in the worls, I invited rejection into my life. A crush I had only wanted to be friends. Something I ran for in school I wasn't elected. I didn't get that promotion. Wow rejection friggin hurts!!!
Discussion:
1. What does rejection look like to you?
2. When you are rejected how do you think and feel? Can you explain this?
3. Now that you shared on how you are feeling and thinking, how do you think mindfulness skills can help refocus you and give you some grounding?
4. Can you share on some skills that help you desculate the negative feelings/thoughts when you are dealing with rejection?
Some helpful mindfulness exercise:
Why We All Need To Practice Emotional First Aid-Ted Talks https://bit.ly/1vTarDo
How to Handle Rejection as a High Sensation Seeking, Highly Sensitive Person https://bit.ly/2iwiyu6
Dealing With Rejection https://bit.ly/2nO6er1
4 ways Mindfulness can help with rejection https://bit.ly/2w2rjkn
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I don
By telling myself that this was bound to happen. And not everyone is meant to stay. People don't leave us hanging. They just teach some valuable lessons and go away. Rejection can either make or break you, purely depends on how you wanna go about it. I feel it would be better if we all take the time to realise the mistakes we've done rather than putting the whole blame on the other person.
I accept it at first, but as soon as the person leaves the room and I'm alone, I blame myself for everything.
By self-love and self-respect. The only reason for a rejection to be taken more seriously than what actually is, in my humble opinion, is the hunger for love, respect and attention.
I really believe that if I have done nothing to create the rejection then it is nothing about me that is causing it. It is something going on for them and maybe I have triggered something in them or they are just having a bad day or they just don't click with me.
Taking it out on myself and then trying to change my personality and interests in a failed attempt to be more likable.
I convince myself that im better alone,then,have an interesting discussion with the other me
I used to self loath, and I still do sometimes, but I have learned that some people aren't just meant to be in your life.
I'm the same person with the same worth, whenever I'm appreciated and whenever I'm not. I can't expect validation from others, my value doesn't depend on them.
There is no use in begging for love, self worth and validation, as I have done in the past.
I trust my feelings and if someone makes me feel free and happy, I will stay. Otherwise I will leave. It's that simple :)
I know I'm an "out of the flock" person, I have learned to accept that I have little chance of feeling good around people. It took me so long to accept it and now I'm free from that burden.
I tell myself all this when I start feeling the bite of rejection. Yet I know there's still a long way to go until it settles in my head and work automatically, as I have spent long years telling myself the opposite: that I was being rejected because I was worthless. Now I know I'm not.
@HelenaofTroy VERY well said!! You sound a lot like me and I was going to reply to this question, but I could not have said it better than you did!
@HelenaofTroy exactly! One
@RumpleSteeleSkin
Rejection seems to be a setback to your confidence, but trust me, its not. I feel very bad in these situations but I always take it as an opportunity for a better insight in my own self. What are the areas in which I need to improve, have more patience, where did it go wrong? Such questions arise in my mind. I give these questions some space keepimg in mind that I can't make everyone happy at a time.
I also think about the things in which I was NOT rejected. They bring back my lost confidence.
I think about my own behavior also, like there are so many instances when I reject other people or there opinion. It gives me a feeling that it happens with everyone.
Lastly, sharing about it here , its the first time I ever shared on such a topic in it feels really good that we are somewhere or the other, so similar to each other.
Hope this helps!!
@CompassionateCompanion thanks for taking the time to share your thoughtful ideas. I appreciate what you shared.
@CompassionateCompanion thanks for sharing. It is a matter of perspective. One could take a rejection quite personal and sulk about it or look at it as a learning opportunity. Self improvement is an ongoing process.
move on
@Bridgetandcompany Absolutely! It may not have been the desired or intended response yet knowing it
