Sexual Feelings and Sexx Chat
People come to 7 Cups looking for support for a variety of reasons. Sometimes, people need help with genuine sexual challenges (premature ejaculation, pain during intercourse, sexual addictions, fetishes, women
There is so much in my mind when I think about the topic of sex. I'm still waiting to have sex. I'm afraid about it to be honest. They say you'll feel comfortable when it is with the right person. But honestly, how do you know for sure if they are right for you or for each other?
@helloWheel3106
Not sure how old you are but believe me when it's the right person you will know. First and foremost that person will not have any issues what so ever waiting as long as it takes for you to be comfortable with idea. If they push or try to talk you in to it then it's not the right person.
I'm 25 years old :) @Geodc
@Geodc yes – this exactly – people say don't compromise but you have to compromise with any relationship, but what you shouldn't do is allow yourself to compromise on major, basic needs like affection and trust. 🙂
Many people have problem with PORN(addiction). I believe the solution it to- to find the solution yourself. Here is one resource for help.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRJ_QfP2mhU
Here is my opinion: (you can completely disagree, your choice)
[please don't be offended if your ideas are different]
There are many people who are forced into 1. Prostitution 2. Pornography. When you watch porn, you create a demand for it. and in a way you are playing a part in that evil act. I DON't. what will you do now ???
@BlazingEssencE There is plenty of porn produced ethically. You can't really lump it all into one category.
@mplstache As I said dear- my opinion. (the reason why I don't support it).
Hello ? can any one tell me what can you do when your husband cums really fast like not even 10 minutes in the process ugh !!
@swayy
Wait 5 mins or so and try again. Should take much longer the second time around. Also have him do more foreplay with you to get you closer to being there to start with.
How do you both feel about toys?
My partner confronted me about he's college desiring him and rumours spread by his boss about her wanting him, after a couple of questions posed by me he told me he considered it at the start of our relationship and had sexual fantasies about her. Ever since I have felt if his boss never told her that she was after him this would not of happened. The problem besides all the hurt I believe I'm pans sexual. I can not desire anyone else when I'm in love. Before this during sex I felt we shared something really special, after I would feel so energetic and happy. My head would rush with the thought of our special bond. I don't feel that way anymore, I can have an orgasm but after I just feel sad. I don't feel like it is anything valuable anymore and I hate myself for treating my body this way. I have never felt uglier and I was always a self content person.
@Ccc22 - that's a lot to handle all at once. if your partner is sharing this with you it sounds like they want to work it out. that's a good sign. if you love each other you can figure if out together.
@Ccc22 On optimism, it may sound like they're bringing it out to be honest in the relationship. Not necessarily to make it right. I'm saying I've been there. It won't be exactly the same... But I'm putting this out there not to give you more worries, but rather for you to have something to consider,
and so if ever it IS what it is, then at least in the future you cannot beat yourself over being so blind, and not having thought of it or considered it at all.
Sometimes people confess things out of impulse --whether it be because it makes them feel guilty and so they have to open pandora's box for relief. Sometimes they say it because... they get off on having it known by someone.
It maybe other things. It may be as Krink says. It may be all of the above mixed into a cocktail that just so happens to hurt you.
In my opinion, if pansexual are as was explained to me --people that fall in love with the personality and one person at a time... it sounds like a wonderful way to love people, to be interested in them...
So from where I'm seated, I think you're a wonderful person.
I know it hurts (not exactly the way you feel it)... I wouldn't know where to begin on how to cope, and what to do, if it were me.
People will always have things we don't like about them. His fantasies being one of yours. It'll be your decision. And his decision. In the end.
I wish you all the best.
I get censored for sharing this interesting post on the chatrooms.....
I am glad this issue is being addressed, but the screening may still need work. I was just pressed for inappropriate and unhelpful details by a listener, who then told me he needed to go watch porn because I made him horny. I have sent a screen shot of the chat to support already, but I am feeling particularly upset since it was a chat about someone sexually pressuring me in the first place. Really upset right now.
Keep up the good work. I know generally that you are doing a lot and that it is hard to screen this stuff, but man.
@BevBam9 - I'm sorry thus happened to you and thank you for reporting that rogue listener.
@KrinkTheMellowUnicorn Thank you for that... what boggles the mind is he seemed to have had good ratings and was level 9. :(
@KrinkTheMellowUnicorn I just realized there are different types of Level 9s. This makes it a bit more understandable... not as experienced a listener as I thought. Whew.
@BevBam9 - ah interesting. we need to make sure that is not misleading.
also that he had good reviews is a little concerning, although sadly some people behave well most of the time and then surprise us.
@BevBam9 I am sorry you suffered like this at the hands of an inappropriate listener. No one should have to go through that. When you browse for a listener, https://www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/ try checking the verified listener box and under topic select PTSD and Trauma, under Sort by select availability for a prompter chat. The verified listeners have graduated to higher standards than the listener training offers.
You may also find these self help guides may speak to some issues you have encountered. https://www.7cups.com/traumatic-experience-help/ https://www.7cups.com/sexual-abuse/
Again my sincere apologies. Thank you for speaking out and reporting this inappropriate behavior.
@soulsings Thank you -- that is excellent advice. And thanks for the support in reporting. I am only glad that it was not with someone more vulnerable than I am.
@BevBam9 you are most welcome.
Sometimes members do not realize how good they would be as listeners. I just want you to know that if you decide to be a listener, you impress me as someone who has the "right stuff" as they say at NASA space progam.
I know our lives are often topsy turvy and we do not seem to have enough time, but listening to members has actually been part of my healing process. So if you have interest feel free to sign up and do the listener training. This could be a life changing event, and people could really benefit from your wisdom and compassion. Just an idea. But I did want to let you know that your communications skills are excellent. :)
@soulsings Thank you for those kind words. I think I probably I would be good at it and enjoy it. The only thing stopping me so far is that I have my own business and feel overwhelmed by the number of projects I have at the moment. But it's something on my radar, and your message made that feel more clear. :)
Very best,
-b
@BevBam9 yes taking care of business is important. I just wanted you to know that when there is time available and if you feel so inclined, you seem to have the needed skills. Just something to keep on the back burner. Thanks for being you!
Here's my confession. I don't watch porn and I absolutely hate masturbating. Guys that I date think I'm lying or get upset by the fact that I don't masturbate. I have a low sex drive and I just wish I could find someone who understands me in this sense. It makes my relationships difficult. I also identify as pansexual. I can like someone no matter what they identify as. When my last girlfriend and I got intimate I was extremely turned off. I actually began to question my entire sexuality because it was such a bad experience. I am still attracted to girls as well as anyone that, but I'm afraid to get intimate with one again. I've also been sexually abused by three different guys in my life and sex is now just a very touchy and sensitive thing for me.
I need advice. I recently started dating this guy who has confessed that when he saw me it was love at first time. I decided to just date him for now so I can get to know him better before we go into a relationship. We've talked about some of our most personal things to each other, but I'm wondering when do you tell a guy that you've been raped three times and are touchy about sex? I'm not sure how long we should be dating or in a relationship before I tell him or how to tell him.
@GlenM
