Welcome Home! Come Sit by the Fire
I took my Dad to Ireland for a bucket list trip.
Our goal was to learn more about our ancestors. We had some info from Ancestry.com, but were pretty much just winging it.
We go to hike the Gap of Dunloe. They have a big map that says “you are here” and we notice a little shop/restaurant called “Moriarty’s” a mile or so away. We are like no way! We do the hike and then go to the shop. I walk in and say I’m a Moriarty. Are there any Moriarty’s here?
The person behind the desk says Con Moriarty is here. He is a historian and loves to connect with other Moriartys. Let me see if he is free. We talk with him for an hour and then he invites us to his home, gives us a couple of books, and points us to the town where our family came from.
We head out for Castlegregory the next day - the town Con pointed us to, where my great grandfather was likely baptised and where my people are buried. We grab a coffee and share with the person that we are here to do some ancestral research. The person in the coffee shop said oh, there is a Moriarty next door working in the pharmacy!
Then we found the graveyard. Here's a pic. 12% of the names were Moriartys.
I was interested in our ancestry from when I was a young teen. My father didn’t really want to talk too much about it, because his parents were not the best parents. He almost died as a kid a few times, had to steal food from the grocery store for his younger sister etc. I mean not good at all. Understandably, this kind of work brought up some uncomfortable things for him.
What I hadn’t realized prior to the trip was that there was a metaphorical big steel wall that was in my lineage or family history. I wasn’t even aware that I was reaching back for a sense of understanding, purpose, or meaning.
When we met Con and talked with him, I felt like he welcomed me in. He stopped by the place we were staying and said things like “I keep thinking of you guys.” He highlighted how the Irish people that stayed in Ireland had a deep sense of loss, a gap in the social fabric, from all the daughters and sons that emigrated. And, when we come back home, they have a deep desire to connect because it allows them to heal and bridge things from their side.
Some of you know that I’m a pretty simple guy. I spend a lot of time in prayer, meditation etc. I’m kind of a monk. Con understood that about me. He was that way himself and he shared other Moriarty’s in history who he felt were more like us.
These discussions were a visceral experience to me. We share the same last name, but are very likely not related. Still, there was a sort of spiritual connection. It allowed me to open a new road or path into my ancestral past. The steel wall or cul-de-sac that stopped at my grandfather was not the only path I had. Now I had a new path and I could feel the connection from me to Con to the past to other Moriarty’s that were likely more monastic, like me.
I struggled with a way to capture this. It felt like I had 4 empty chambers (or 4 connected rooms) behind me. I wasn’t even aware they were there before. Then each one had a fire in the chamber and a sort of continuous flame that passed through all of them. I felt my ancestry was healing. I've been working on this for decades and could feel some doors open that had been shut.
I've been marinating on this experience for the last month. The more I sit with it the more I think of us and what we are building at 7 Cups. This isn't about the trip to Ireland. It is about sharing my past, finding a stranger and him welcoming me in.
We refer to ourselves as a community. Sometimes people call us a tribe. There are other times that we’ve been described as a big family.
Many of you have written to me over the years. You have shared this deep sense of connection, belonging, and like hey I might be unusual, but I’m not alone! I’ve found my people.
I want to extend what Conn did for me to all of you. I’d like 7 Cups to be a place where any that are searching can find a deep sense of connection, belonging, and lineage. We are not related - just like I was not related to Conn - but we share a love for compassion, connection, and courage.
Con didn't welcome me because I had it figured out. He made room for me while I was searching. I want to pass this same welcome to you. If you are not sure you’ve found your home yet in this world, then I invite you into my home. Please sit by the fire. I’m glad you found us and I’m very glad we found you!
@GlenM
I m more than glad of finding all of you too Glen. We all are like a family here and the sense of belonging is very much present🤍
@cheerfulKiwi1776 welcome home! thank you for looking out for others and helping to share the stew we have on the fire. you have made many feel welcome!
@GlenM
I hope so🤍
Thanks for welcoming me🫂
@GlenM
Hi Glen! 😊 ❤️
This was so incredibly beautiful to read! ❤️ Thank you for sharing with us and in the specific ways that you have! You are sharing of yourself, with us. We matter to you! 😇
I'm glad that you took the bucket list trip with your dad. I can really get how it must have been a bit bitter sweet for both you and he. Reaching for things, wanting to experience things, maybe things that he was trying very hard to look away from in the past. It's really wonderful that you took him to Ireland. 🍀
I'm glad that you both had rich experiences. Connecting with other kind and kindred spirits and someone that even shared your last name. And Wow! To stand in places where your ancestors once stood. The castle, the graveyard even. To see the headstones chiseled with your ancestors names. I can understand the feelings of "I am with my tribe now".
I have always wanted to visit Ireland as it's part of my heritage too. You had mentioned when you were in route. I wanted so badly to pm you and ask you to take off your shoes and socks, to stand in that Irish grass. To crinkle your toes, put your socks back on and "accidentally" 😏 transfer some of your heritage right back home with you. Lol 😊 Wasn't sure if customs would be upset for grass particles in socks, so, I left it alone 😊
If it were me, I probably would have stood there for a very long while, felt the gravity of situation. Maybe even a tear or two. I would have been on my knees in that grass, digging at the dirt with both hands, get it under my fingernails and just sit for a bit, with that Irish dirt in my hands where my family members were and walked across at one point. You may have? I won't be asking, but from one person that taps into their inner monk to another, I'm confident there had to have been certain things that you did. 😊
I love how you are able to relate world to self. How you have the ability to see the deeper meaning of things. I love how you were thinking of us all the while and how it is that your experiences would translate back here at your home. Your home on 7 cups where so many of us live that are part of your tribe.
Many of us do, just so happen to see this place as sacred ground. It's really amazing when we come across others here on the platform that are good, that are kind, that are willing spirits and so.....with different ways of connecting, we are able to feel that others are part of our tribe. When it happens, I see it as a gift 🎁.
Grateful to sit by the fire 🔥here, to feel the warmth, the goodness of others and share that bowl of soup.
I'm glad that you and your dad had a great time and that you both made it back safely. ❤️
*high fives* 😊 and *hugs* ❤️
@SparkyGizmo thank you for sharing this reflection with us Sparky! Yes, indeed, you all matter to me very much. I've been working alongside you all for 13 years. 7 Cups is my fifth child! Blood, sweat, and tears and I know many have given as much as I have and more. Remarkable!
That is what I think makes this sacred ground. I'm not sure how it happens, but I do think people can somehow "smell" sacrifice - like it somehow gets registered in a way that we can sense or understand, but that we are not quite conscious of. I've thought about this a bit and need better language for it, but I think that generosity, compassion, sacrifice gets transmitted as something that is beyond and sacred.
It was sobering learning about our ancestral past. So much pain, loss, and shame. A lot of history here that I don't need to go into. One piece that I thought was very interesting, was that before someone left they had a "live wake" for them. If they were going to America, they'd have a sort of funeral ritual for them before they left because they knew they were never going to see them again. I thought that was incredibly meaningful.
Con recommended we do exactly what you mention. Take our shoes and socks off and walk the beach at Castlegregory. We didn't do it, b/c we were afraid of getting parked in, but I wanted to!
I did say a prayer in the church with my father - in his Grandfather's church - and he thanked God for softening his heart around his family. I thought that was beautiful.
A long journey we are on here! Thank you for walking with us!
@GlenM
This too, so beautiful!!!!! ❤️
I like Con! 😁 *high fives* 😊 and *hugs* ❤️ for that awesome guy too!
Some of us "smell sacrifice" .... yes, that, that right there! Some words I'll never forget. So very well said and really does "hit you right where you live"!
❤️❤️❤️
That’s so nice @GlenM , and touching also
I’m really glad that I’ve found you all
Thanks for sharing your story,
Also thanks for your warm and cozy invitation 🥰
@GlenM
Thank you for sharing such a tender, human story of connection. The way you and your father were welcomed, seen, and invited into something larger than yourselves is the kind of healing many of us spend years searching for.
What touched me most was how you carried that flame back here. The idea that lineage isn’t only blood, but also compassion, courage, and the willingness to show up for one another; that’s something I think many of us have felt without knowing how to name it. 7 Cups has been that “new path” for so many: a place where the steel walls soften, where we find people who understand the quiet parts of us, and where belonging doesn’t have prerequisites.
Thank you for opening your home, your story, and your fire to all of us. I’m grateful to be part of this community, and I’m grateful you’re here tending the flame.
Hello @GlenM
I want to take this space to congratulate you for building 7 cups. I think I had first come across it about 10 years ago when I was at a real low but somehow I found my way out.
Now, years later I’ve come back to volunteer, to be present. It truly fascinates me how people have consciously decided to become available for others- it is so powerful. There’s no negativity, no unwelcoming feeling and it just feels so normal to be here. I don’t think there’s any space on the internet that offers anything remotely close to this- the resources, training, support! I can go on and on but I don’t want to move away from your story. It’s so powerful and going to Ireland is on my bucket list too!
Cheers!
Thank for a beautiful picture 📸
- @GlenM
This is so amazing and absolutely emotional! I'm really happy that you were finally able to understand your ancestry better. And I'm glad your father could actually join you!
Wooooww! This was very beautiful.. I wanted to know my ethnicity/background. Neither of my parents really knew their fathers. Both were abusive and left them in their early childhood. Ancestry stirred up some things. Some good. My uncle who is my dad's half brother found his biological dad because me and my dad both did the ancestry.com swab as well. I found out my mom has a half brother she's never met. Her dad also swabbed ancestry.com Not sure what he was looking for but he denied my contact. The coolest thing was getting confirmation that Im Scottish. 60% Hilariously enough for a few weeks Ancestry said I was Irish. Lol Same consensus was reached. Family is where your community and connection is. It's not so much about blood but about the people who pour into you.
@GlenM
This is beautiful, Glen and what a beautiful journey you took us on. When did you visit? I can imagine it was a really symbolic trip for your father and also for you to learn more about your roots.
Ireland is connected to my heritage too and when I went to visit Dublin for the day in honour of my Grandad, I felt such a strong connection to really welcoming Irish people! I went into a shop and it had surname plaques and Moriarty was heavily featured.
