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Sexual attraction: What's the difference between romantic attraction and sexual attraction?

320 Answers
Last Updated: 01/20/2020 at 3:57pm
Sexual attraction: What's the difference between romantic attraction and sexual attraction?
★ This question about LGBTQ+ Issues was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Top Rated Answers
QueerDeer
June 19th, 2015 5:19pm
Romantic attraction, put into simple words would be "wow I want to marry him/her/they" and possibly not being interested in sex. And sexual attraction would be "wow I would like to have coitus with him/her/they". For example, I am a lesbian who is also panromantic. Meaning, I would be able to be with a female, and also have sex with her. But, panromantic being, I could get romantically attracted to anyone of any gender. So, an even simpler example: -Asexual -Homoromantic A person who is not willing to have sex with anyone/doesn't feel a sex drive, but, is romantically interested in someone of the same sex. Hope this helped!
AndyWithers
June 19th, 2015 2:19pm
If you are for example homoromantic -you don't want to have sex with the person or intimate stuff (i think its a part of the asexualcommunity) and if you are homosexual you want also sex with the person or intimate stuff
RocketClouds
June 19th, 2015 9:52am
Romantic attraction can be to sort of seek romance, that you want someone to be there, you want to love them selflessly and accept them and they make your heart flutter, it is more of the person and who they are and what kind of relationship you want from them, that determines romantic attraction. Sexual attraction can be defined in terms of pure lust, you want to have sex with them, which is normal, don't worry. You may not care that much about their personality or how they are but it is your very animal instinctual force driving you to a want to fulfill the the sexual need.
WonderlandRabbit
June 19th, 2015 6:26am
Well, romantic attraction and sexual attraction are defined differently depending on the person. Romantic attraction to me is emotions, and sexual attraction is something physical.
SpiritOasis
June 19th, 2015 4:18am
Sexual attraction occurs when you are definitely physically attracted to a person, however there are no emotional responses towards that person . A romantic attraction, the emotional responses and possible bonds are present.
Anonymous
June 19th, 2015 3:03am
Romantic attraction is when you're attracted to them in every way, and just want to be near them. Sexual is when you crave sex with this person.
Anonymous
June 19th, 2015 2:44am
Romantic attraction can seem more innocent, it's more about wanting to spend time with someone or getting to know them better. Sexual attraction is pure lust, and without the feelings of romantic attraction.
rhea752
June 18th, 2015 11:03pm
For me the difference has always been whether it is a emotional/mental attraction - romantic- or a physical attraction - sexual. Not to say that they can't coexist but there for me is the actual physical reaction and the mental one.
3amthoughts
June 18th, 2015 9:21pm
Sexual attraction is purely physical. It's when you want someone only to fulfill your primary needs and feel satisfied. Romantic attraction, however, is a feeling where not only you feel physical attraction, but you seek comfort and belonging and you want to share your thoughts on unimportant subjects just so you could spend more time with other person. That being said, romantic attraction doesn't have to be followed by sexual, or other way around.
happysloth
April 22nd, 2015 6:22pm
Romantic attraction is the emotional side -- the warm, fuzzy feeling their personality, quirks, and snuggles give you. Sexual attraction is generally more physical.
SpencerT
April 8th, 2015 5:39pm
Romantic attraction is a social construct, sexual attraction is an instinct that ensures the continuation of the human race. One might be romantically attracted to the idea of a financially secure and generous person, even if sexual attraction is not there. One might be sexually attracted to somebody, generally due to individual physical attributes considered attractive, regardless of any romantic aspects. Though different, they amount to fundamentally similar outcome: the human instinct to survive and and have healthy offspring.
Anonymous
January 5th, 2015 5:30am
A romantic attraction is when you feel an inclination or allure to do romantic things with a person, while sexual attraction refers to a pull or allure to do sexual activities/things with another. The parameters of what's romantic and what’s sexual might depend largely on the person...for example for some kissing someone on the mouth might be romantic while for another that could be sexual. For some people, these two orientations go hand in hand (as someone being bisexual is also biromantic) but for someone that experience this attraction differently they might explain it a little more 9 some examples might be a panromantic asexual or a biromantic homosexual, etc.).
GwenTG
December 21st, 2014 7:18pm
Sexual orientation: Orientation of genders to which one experiences sexual (erotic) attraction usually expressed with sexual interactions, fantasy, lust, and stimulation. Romantic orientation: Orientations of genders to which one experiences romantic (love) attraction expressed by interpersonal bonding, relationship-building, and emotion.
tranquilCentaur
December 7th, 2014 11:18pm
Romantic attraction is wanting be romantically involved with a person without sex or anything sexual being a factor. Sexual attraction is based solely on if you would have sex or any sort of sexual encounter with someone.
Marto
December 4th, 2014 7:21am
Well, this is a very difficult answer. I'm sorry for the wall of text: Romantic attraction can be completely platonic in nature. There can be no trace of sexuality in it. A gay guy can feel it for a straight girl. It can be anything from spiritual, intellectual, emotional. Of course it can encompass all of them, and also be sexual. But they are not necessarily inclusive, and they are not mutually exclusive. At the same time, sexual attraction can be purely physical. It's my opionion, of course, but I don't believe they have to overlap. I believe someone can have a sexual relationship with somebody without that marring or hurting an emotional relationship they have with someone else. I don't believe it's cheating, as long as everything is talked about from the beginning and they go through the basic notions of what it's to be expected of each other. Of course, if there isn't an explicit agreement, and you hide from your SO that you're having sexual relationships, even if you consider them to be meaningless, then it'd be wrong, it'd be cheating. I believe in honesty and full disclosure. Everything else is second to that.
Erynn
November 29th, 2014 8:37am
Sexual attraction is having feelings of a sexual nature - you would like to have a sexual relation with this person - either in real life, or in fantasy. Romantic attraction is having feelings of a romantic, but not sexual, nature. It's perhaps wanting to kiss, cuddle, but maybe even less physical things like say I love you and go on dates and do the emotional-caring part of a relationship but not necessarily with the physical parts of a relationship. Often, sexual attraction and romantic attraction happen at the same time, but not always. Sometimes people are only sexually attracted to a person, or only romantically attracted.
eternalBubbles87
November 27th, 2014 9:26pm
Romantic attraction is when you would like to develop a romantic relationship. A sexual attraction is when you want to develop a sexual relationship
Anonymous - Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
November 27th, 2014 1:04am
Sexual attraction is typically defined as a pull or allure toward a specific person in which you wish to partake in sexual activities with them. It's looking at a person and having a feeling that makes you think "I'd like to have sex with them." Romantic attraction, on the other hand, is typically defined as a similar pull or allure toward a specific person, but instead of a sexual desire, it's a romantic desire. It's when you look at someone and have a feeling that makes you think "I'd like to do romantic things with them." What those romantic things entail depends on the person. For some, it may be dates, dinners, holding hands, and cuddling. Others may include kissing with that. Others may not like anything that involves touching. Whatever activities, thoughts, and feelings you think of when you consider what is "romantic," those are what you'd think about, feel toward, and want to do with someone you are romantically attracted to.
Anonymous
November 27th, 2014 12:59am
Romantic is where you feel emotionally connected to someone and want a relationship, sexual is about sex.
chamomilecompanion
November 26th, 2014 11:10pm
Romantic attraction deals with trust and respect on an emotional level. You feel supported and cared for and do the same for your partner.