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Am I bisexual or am I lesbian?

42 Answers
Last Updated: 11/25/2019 at 4:39am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
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Tara Davis, Doctorate in Counselling Psychology


I have worked successfully with a wide range of difficulties. Nothing is more important than developing a warm, compassionate relationship with someone you can trust

Top Rated Answers
September 6th, 2016 11:26am
Ask yourself this instead; Do you like girls, and girls alone, or something similar, or do you like boys and girls? Simple as that. Identity is a tough thing, especially at young age, experiment around and find out what you are for yourself :)
February 14th, 2017 5:14pm
When it comes to sexual preferences; only one person in the world knows their own sexual orientation. There are many terms out there, that people don't know about. If you feel innately and you have had experiences that made you think that you are bisexual or a lesbian. Good for you! But if you are young and a teenager, you'll have plenty of time to discover who you are, if you are person who is an adult and realising this, no journey to discovering your sexual orientation is the same as everyone else's. Take your time and figure yourself out who you are, because when you do. The people who will love and support you will be there regardless, as they still see you, rather than your sexual preference for either being bisexual or a lesbian.
June 27th, 2017 6:02pm
You don't have to label yourself, it's 2017! Like who you like, love who you love. You have time to figure out your sexuality, try seeing if you're more attracted to girls only or both girls and boys! It's hard to completely figure it out, but your sexuality is valid and in no need to be labeled.
July 17th, 2017 6:11am
Sexuality is on a spectrum, you may lean towards women more while still being attracted to men or you can be attracted to both genders equally. If you experience attraction to both genders that is considered bisexual while lesbian means exclusively attracted to other women. I wouldn't worry too much about the label though. Just love who you love and be happy.
October 3rd, 2017 2:39am
I struggled with this question at first. However, I have finally come to terms that to me the labels are not important and do not define how I feel. I have also accepted it is okay to not be for sure and to explore yourself and what is true to you. Sexuality is a difficult thing to express into a label, especially for myself, so I try to keep an open mind and just try to better understand myself every day. In the end, the label is not as important as you understanding what feels right for you.
November 20th, 2017 9:08am
As we are discovering more and more, the awareness that sexuality is not a straight line, no either or. Sexuality is a spectrum of which you can fall anywhere on it however, just because you feel one way one day doesn’t mean you cannot change your mind and become curious or inclined towards the opposite end of said spectrum. Sexuality can be fluid like gender. Say you have a rising interest in women, that doesn’t immediately make you a lesbian, especially if your interest in men/nonbinary etc stays a constant. No one demands that sexuality be labelled. ‘Fluctuating and evolving’ is something I hear a lot of in my community and I stand by that. Embrace your feelings and urges, explore if you want to, whatever the outcome you will be accepted and perhaps you’ll learn something about yourself in the process.
March 8th, 2018 11:38pm
It depends. I am bi myself. If you find you are liking a girl the same a boy, you are bi. If you like only girls, you are lesbian.
April 24th, 2018 3:22pm
I think that deep down only you have the ability to answer that for your self. It may take time, but as life goes on I believe you will be able to know yourself better. There is no rush in finding a label, it is best to just feel your feelings without without worrying about what they might mean.
June 5th, 2018 11:09pm
I’m not entirely sure of your story but for the most part, if you feel sexual attraction towards guys as well as girls you’re most likely bi. You could also be homo flexible which means that you’re a lesbian who occasionally is sexually attracted to guys. Really it all boils down to what you feel fits you the best and makes you the most comfortable. Hope this helps!
September 17th, 2018 10:22pm
You are bisexual if you are sexually or just generally attracted to both genders. You are lesbian if you're only attracted to females, not both genders. You can find both genders attractive but only want a relationship with females, which would make you a lesbian. You could also find both genders attractive and be happy with a relationship with either gender which would make you bisexual. However, don't think about it too hard because I think that you'll know yourself if you think about it a little. As long as you're happy and comfortable with you're choice, then it's fine.
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
June 17th, 2019 7:51pm
It all depends on what your feelings towards men are. You can try to picture yourself with men, both in sexual and romantic contexts, and try to analyze how you respond to such ideas, what your emotions are when you fantasize about it. If you feel attracted towards men, if you respond with enthusiasm and desire to those scenarios and you have the same response when you picture yourself with women, then you are bisexual. If you find women attractive, but you don't feel the same about men, that would make you a lesbian.
November 25th, 2019 4:39am
The only person that can answer this question is you! Labels can be finicky because for some, they're something concrete to hold onto, and for others, it can be something restricting. There is absolutely no need to rush through figuring your sexuality out-- this will come to you with time and as you meet more people. Speaking from my own experience, it took me a long time to figure out my own sexuality. I fluctuated between probably 3-4 different labels, all within a few years time span. And none of them felt right, either-- not until I found a label that best fit me and just felt intrinsically right. I really wish you well in your journey of self discovery!