Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Will I learn to deal with the scrutiny I receive for my orientation?

10 Answers
Last Updated: 06/14/2019 at 8:35am
1 Tip to Feel Better
Moderated by

Maryna Svitasheva, PhD. RP

Licensed Professional Counselor

Psychotherapy I provide is based on a dialog and your active intention to look for a solution with the therapist's assistance

Top Rated Answers
January 27th, 2015 1:17am
It gets better. Sometimes it's so, so hard to ignore the stares, the whispers, the snickers, the outright hostility. It gets easier. It may well always hurt some, but you can find community. Finding times and places where you don't feel you're under scrutiny can help enormously.
February 17th, 2015 12:45pm
I believe you will! Personally, I've been able to look past the scrutiny I've gotten for my sexual orientation and not let it affect me. It's come mainly from those around me who love me for me and have pushed me towards being more secure in who I am. The opinion of those who love me is far more important than that of those who hate me.
April 11th, 2015 6:44am
Yep! That's a short answer, but it's true! It can take time though, but you can certainly learn how to handle societal homophobia. As we age and grow more confident in ourself, less influenced by our peers, and more connected to our community we can grow to be more 'immune' to the casual homophobia that affects us everyday. However, the big stuff, the important people, ... things like that tend to always affect us. BUT, we can certainly learn how to care for ourselves when those things happen and seek support or comfort ourselves when those things come up. Hang in there friend. It does get better (eventually).
June 15th, 2015 2:12pm
Getting scrutiny because of sexual orientation is something most, if not all, LGBTA members go through. Personally, it was something I got used to, because I became comfortable with myself. Once you accept yourself, it helped me realize that other people's opinions of me are not as important as my opinion and acceptance of myself.
November 14th, 2015 12:37am
You will learn to deal with the scrutiny you receive from your orientation. The truth hurts sometimes, I know. As we gain advocacy for different orientations, it will get better, I promise. Just remember to stay close to a close friend :)
February 6th, 2017 12:42am
It sucks that people scrutinize people for their orientations, but the good news is that while you become more comfortable with yourself and your orientation, you will be less affected by people who scrutinize you for it. Your orientation is personal to you, and other people aren't going to change you because they don't understand or don't like your choices. Try to find communities where your orientation is celebrated and surround yourself with people who support you.
April 11th, 2017 12:55am
Yes, you will if you motivate and learn to accept yourself as well. I would suggest you reach out to the LBGT community.
June 5th, 2018 11:15pm
Sadly, everyone, at some point, will probably be judged for their orientation. I think the best thing to do is surround yourself self with people who don’t criticize you for your orientation. And, i know it’s hard, but try to ignore them, recognize that you like the way you are. Maybe even try being nice to them while being proud, kill em with kindness.
June 3rd, 2019 9:36pm
Not only will you learn to deal with it, one day you’ll be able to bask in the attention it gives you. That’s why it’s called ‘Pride’. There’s nothing wrong with you and that’s a fact. Anyone you love is privileged to be loved by you. The scrutiny you receive today will only make you stronger. Take it in your stride and be confident, it’ll give you a more secure sense of who you are. The scrutiny you receive isn’t worth stressing over, simply because your orientation isn’t something you can change. You shouldn’t want to change it, either, because you’re perfect as you are.
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
June 14th, 2019 8:35am
Dealing with judgements can be bothering, because it's just so unfair, but with time and awareness everyone can learn how to deal with it. You can practice awareness of your own feelings and value to boost your self-confidence, so that other people won't be able to make you doubt yourself or feel unworthy. It will get better! And remember, it's ok to explain your reality and help the other person learn and accept something they're not familiar with, but if they won't listen to reason, it's their problem! As long as you're confident in yourself and have someone supportive by your side, you'll be fine!