Will my friends push me away if I tell them my sexual orientation?
32 Answers
Last Updated: 02/16/2021 at 5:44am
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Tanyia Hughes, Adv Dip Psy
Psychotherapist
I have been through a lot in life too, which helps me to be able to empathize with situations, thoughts and feelings that we have. Sometimes, it's not easy just being human.
Top Rated Answers
That depends strongly on your friends. I don't think true friends would ever push you away because telling them what sex you prefer doesn't change anything. If they really care about you as a person they'll support you and nothing will change. Give them time but don't waste your time trying to convince them that it's normal and nothing they have to 'accept' or 'agree' with you. It should be like telling somebody you like playing tennis.
If your friends are true friends for who you are they will accept you no matter what sexual orientation you have.
Your best friends will not care what sexual orientation you are. They choose to be around you because of who you are not for who you date. Also, the greatest of friends will be able to listen to you unbiasly.
If your friends love you for who you are and not any of your preferences, then no, they will not. You shouldn't be ashamed to tell anyone about your sexual orientation because, well, it's yours. Try to explain calmly, and most likely they'll accept you no matter what.
It depends on whether not they are good friends. When I came out as bisexual, most of my friends were supportive and accepted me. But there were one or two that reacted negatively, and I soon learned that they were people that I did not want to have in my life. If your friends are good, decent people, they will not push you away.
I don't know your friends, but what I do know is that if they do, they weren't your friends to begin with. Friends accept each other for who they are, and if they don't accept you, thy aren't worth your prescious time.
True friends are accepting and supportive! Friends, unlike family, are people that we choose to have in our lives. We need to surround ourselves with positive and like minded people.
My friends never pushed me away when I came out to them, rather each and everyone replied, "you are saying this now?? come on, we knew about you!" or something similar. I always feel if they are your "FRIENDS" then they will accept you no matter what and if they don't trust me dearest they are NOT your friends.
No. Not your true friends anyway. Your friends are there to love you and accept you for who you are as a person. If they were true friends who loved you for YOU then your sexual orientation is not something that will push them away. Remember, you don't need anyone in your life who doesn't love you for the person you are inside and out.
Anonymous
November 8th, 2017 7:19pm
To be honest, some might. Though telling your friends will definitely reveal who will love and support you no matter what and who has conditions for your friendship. Being honest will reveal the truth in everyone.
True friends would never judge you for your sexual orientation, if they did push you away then you know you need to find new friends- those who love you for you.
Anonymous
February 26th, 2018 8:32pm
Most friends will not push you away at all. More and more people are becoming accepting of the LGBTQ+ community, so there's a good chance that your friends are one of those. Your friends will be happy that you told them the truth, as well as just simply having another thing to talk about. Don't get the wrong idea in your head, coming out does not mean that you'll be isolated for being different. If you need someone to talk to, I'm here for you. :)
Anonymous
February 27th, 2018 2:56am
I cant not say that they will push you away, but I can tell you that if they are true friends then they will be by your side to help you grow
This is a question every non heterosexual person asks themselves. The answer is, that it depends on what sort of friends you have and how their minds were conditioned to think. In many cases people may withdraw from you because of some sort of religious conviction or because they have been taught by society that it's not normal or appropriate. But many people also can see past religious and societal biases and will have an open mind! Maybe you'll lose friends, but that's alright because you'll gain new and better ones. If they push you away, that's because they just aren't meant to be in your life. You should aim to surround yourself with affirming individuals.
If your friends really love you and care for you, they will realize that nothing changes in the person you are, that all the personality traits they've always known and liked about you are not affected by your sexual orientation. You're always you, and they will know that! If someone pushes you away because of your orientation, that would probably mean their friendship has never been that deep, because your identity can't ruin friendships that are real and true.
It's unknown until you tell them, it's hard to say "yes" or "no" because people are different, we don't know your friends or how they're like. One thing for sure though, is that whether they push you away or are there to stay, is YOU MATTER. Your sexual orientation is not your personality, your values, or the kind of person you are in this world. It is your sexual orientation. And some people may feel uncomfortable with it, and some people may celebrate it, but no matter what please know that you are worthy and you don't need the validation of other people's approval of what you have defined for yourself.
I myself, have never had to come out to friends, but I am very familiar with the perspective of bing a friend. I've never judged a friend, for their sexual orientation. It's really great to see your friends finally being able to express themselves. I have always felt really happy when someone has come out to me since I see it as them trusting me with that information, especially if they have not come out to everyone in their life. If your friends push you away because you told them your sexual orientation, then there is most likely something else that is causing the issue. It is a separate issue or is a problem with them, personally.
Some will and some will not. If they do push you away, then they are not friend friends. They are not people you need in your life
If they are good, accepting friends, they won't. If they're fake friends who aren't willing to accept you for who you are and decide to leave you, you deserve better than them anyway.
If their friendships are real, they wont push you away. You are more than just someone who is defined by his sexual orientation ;)
Anonymous
June 20th, 2016 3:39am
Friends are there to support you. Even if their beliefs aren't the same as your own. Depending on the level of your friendship, they shouldn't. However if they do, it's okay. Everyone isn't taught to love unconditionally and support regardless.
True friends won't care and just accept you for you.
Your true friends will accept you for who you are. the fakes ones will not. If they can't accept you for who you are, they were never your friends.
My personal experience is that I remained friends with the majority of them. Some were a little uncomfortable in the first place, but after a little time and chats we became even closer than before. I could be more authentic to myself and it showed in my behaviour, which became more confident and my friends felt attracted to that confidence.
It depends on what they think on said orientation. If they're homophobic, they must be problematic to start with.
Anonymous
December 11th, 2015 4:18am
As everyone before me has said, true friends will love you no matter what your sexual orientation. That being said, you never know what people's reactions will be, and that is hard. You might find that some friends don't act in the most supportive way, but that reflects on them and not on you. And I am sure you will have friends who will stand by you. No matter what happens there are people out there who support you no matter what. Those are the people to focus on because they are the real friends.
If they do, they're not real friends. My friends didn't push me away when they learned mine, and I don't know anyone who's lost friends from coming out.
Your true friends won't the people whose opinions matter will accept you for who you are no matter what. As for those who would push you away.. they have no right to call themselves your friend.
Anonymous
August 4th, 2015 2:44pm
True friends are those who accept you the way you are. You will get to know who your true friends are when you tell them your sexual orientation, so that you can only hold on to the true ones.
No. They should support you in every way possible like a friend should.no one should have to keep being gay a secret.
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