Discussion 05: Ethical, Cultural, and Group Management Issues
Please note: In order to successfully complete the program, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/show that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and implement the learning in the chat rooms. If you didn't participate in Discussion 04: Group Leadership
, then check here!
This discussion highlighted some of the major points related to ethical, cultural, and group management
The competent group leaders act ethically in leading the groups. And, achieving this type of competence requires more than good intentions. Many well-intended group leaders have engaged in an activity while lacking solid ethical principles. It could probably be because of unawareness of the code of conduct and guidelines. So, a high level of familiarity with the guidelines is important so they act as professionals and leaders while leading any group.
A few points to remember:
Privacy and Confidentiality. It could be possible a group leader may also be a long term listener for a member. Members might have shared their situation in detail with them in a 1:1 setup. But, when you are a group leader, you need to ensure you are not bringing up the matter discussed in 1:1 with members unless the members themselves bring up the topic and discuss it with the rest of the group as well.
Follow Community Guidelines. Preach what you can follow. As a group leader, you would need to intervene from time to time to ensure the group is running effectively. Reminding users that they follow community and chatroom guidelines while participating. But, at the same time, remember to be the first to follow the guidelines too. So, you are able to model the role behavior in the groups.
Make unbiased decisions. In a group, everyone is equal to you as a leader. Even if you communicate with some of them more frequently than others. If anything goes wrong or you find anyone being unsupportive or unacceptable behavior, take the decisions without any bias. So, the group could trust you and know that you are impartial and there for everyone and against wrong behaviors. For more, here are the community guidelines.
Members in the group come from different backgrounds, demographics, and cultural differences. So, as a leader, it is significant to respect and acknowledge the cultural differences and highlight the common grounds to connect all members of the group. Such behavior allows members to feel inclusive and comfortable in the groups to share.
And the group management issues include conflict management. You may observe that sometimes misunderstanding or disagreement causes conflict between two or more people leading to an unsupportive and unhealthy environment in the room. So as a leader, it is your time to take action and settle down the conflict to ensure room and group stay supportive and comfortable around each other. Spontaneity is the key to restrict such events from happening.
Discussion: What is one ethical, cultural, or group management issue you recognized in the room? What would you do to handle it?
Activity: Respond to at least two of your fellow trainees' comments with thoughts on their share.
After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next discussion here. Ensure to implement the learning from these discussions in the chat rooms to build and support the group. You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these discussions to successfully complete the program.
What is one ethical, cultural, or group management issue you recognized in the room? What would you do to handle it?
I feel like often times, mods and listeners can seem too robotic and condescending without meaning to sound that way. For instance, if someone were suicidal, a good way would be to have them seek help without copying and pasting the template 7 Cups suggests and just move on. From my experience, leaders and some listeners in chatrooms can often forget that they're real human beings too and feelings can't be faked. You can't pretend to say 'I'm sorry' or 'I understand' without actually feeling sorry and understanding and I feel like that is often the case when someone is distraught and a listener/mod feels like they 'should' say something to help where in reality they might not mean what they typed.
@ASilentObserver What is one ethical, cultural, or group management issue you recognized in the room? What would you do to handle it?
One ethical issue I came across was one member trying to spark conflict with another member, so the conduct of confidentiality (the member mentioned other members names) and respect was violated (made sexist comments, said one of the members has privilege). At the time what I did was PM the member they were attacking for a 1-1 chat, giving them a safer space to talk as although a member was being aggressive towards them they did not retaliate. The member made a sexist comment and I learned that this very member in the support room had previously talked to the other member and that member blocked them so many times. I did message that member and the moderator on duty that I screenshot some abusive messages the member said to the other member and me (after I tried to intervene to stop the behaviour) to the community and that they will try to take action on the matter. The moderator responded by telling me that I can fill out an emergency room if no peer supporter, chat supporter is available.
Taking this experience into account , I have asked members to please read the chatroom rules and be respectful to each other without mentioning names to avoid triangulation. When a member asked who said this - I mentioned that I don’t want to share names or call people as I want to protect their anonymity and confidentiality.
A cultural issue I have experienced in the chatrooms is that religion is sometimes mentioned, there was a listener in the chatrooms that had put something about them prasing their religion in every message which was overlooked. I would message listener in question and ask them not to put that in the chat as some people may be opposed to that religion or believe in a different one.
I've noticed in group environments sometimes people can gloss over someone who needs support in favour of lighthearted or off topic chat which can be dterminetal to someone who needs the time and support, and I try to direct the conversation to the person in need of support by engaging my active listening skills as well as inviting others to join in on supporting one or more members and steering everyone on topic to the conversation at hand without invalidating anyone's feelings in the process :)
@ASilentObserver
Discussion: What is one ethical, cultural, or group management issue you recognized in the room? What would you do to handle it?
One issue that I've noticed, even though it is usually well intended, is listeners or support team stepping on each others toes in sharing circles or support rooms and sometimes with conflicting information. I've done this myself without realizing it. Everyone wants to help and support which is great, but too many people trying to help at the same time can seem off putting or aggressive to vulnerable people sharing or listeners asking for help with a stressful chat.
For example in sharing circles as we all know, there can be interruptions or rule breaking, like giving advice and asking questions between members. Most of the time it's new people that aren't aware of the rules or flow yet. It's a learning experience for a new member when the support room host gently corrects or reminds of a rule. But when 2 or 3 people that aren't hosting also point it out, new and already nervous people tend to shut down their shares. In the listener support room it can be the same way where it's all well intentioned because everyone wants to help. Sometimes there are multiple people in the support room who may not be aware of each others roles and responsibilities, all they know is they want to help. But when a listener pops in from a stressful chat needing help, the listener can be overwhelmed with different guidance from several different people and leave without feeling supported.
These are actually current challenges that I'm trying to be mindful of when I'm in the rooms. In sharing circles, I try to post reminders of the rules when new people are coming in. Also, I try to welcome new arrivals quickly while saying who we are listening to. I notice the quicker I respond or gently correct, the less the rest of the room feels like they need to jump in.
With listener support room, I think anyone that goes in there needs to be familiar with the different support roles and responsibilities and chat support referral before offering any help. Also, allowing chat support time to respond before giving any guidance seems to help maintain a calm and controlled environment. Lastly, when people ask for consent from chat support, or the listener needing help, before offering any other helpful resources, the information is more well received and appreciated.
What is one ethical, cultural, or group management issue you recognized in the room? What would you do to handle it?
one cultural issue i have had first hand experience with is the use of abbreviations in the groups , as someone who does not explore the site much and is relatively new , the abbreviations can get confusing at times like LSR , SC etc , also the understanding of different roles
a possible solution is to either stress on using the complete word , or frequently add a list of the most commonly used ones in the chat.
@BeTheLight111
This is a really good point you made here. While I host my weekly sharing circles, I sometimes see other listeners using such abbreviations, but don't do anything about it because I never would've thought there is something wrong with this. I'm glad that you brought this up, because in the future I will certainly make sure listeners refrain from using these abbreviations (at least without typing out the full meaning).
@ASilentObserver
I've observed that some people gets ignored and dismissed when the rest are already in a conversation and that can make new member difficult to be part of the group.
As a group leader, I can take note of such incidents of and when it happens, I can help them feel welcome and more comfortable during the group discussion
@blissfulForest7074
This is a really good point you made here. I'm happy to hear that you are working towards providing a more inclusive environment for all members. This will certainly ensure a more positive group environment for all members.
@blissfulForest7074 yeah, this happens a lot
@ASilentObserver
Discussion: What is one ethical, cultural, or group management issue you recognized in the room? What would you do to handle it?
At times there are some members/listeners who are friends and tend to start falling into personal/inside jokes or talk about previous conversations and tend to make others excluded and left out. I understand there are people who get along and miss each other, but if they feel like catching up it should be done within PMs. No disrespect at all ☮
@MoonChild1206
I agree moon, those kind of things can create exclusivity in a support room. It is great that you would remind them.
What is one ethical, cultural, or group management issue you recognized in the room? What would you do to handle it?
@29amy
Great answer, the newbies being mocked due to being new and not knowing much is very sad - I often send newcomers this link https://tinyurl.com/WelcomeTo7CupsM that takes them to the New Member Book that answers FAQ's and explains several things, might be worth bookmarking it and providing it to newbies in the future
All around an amazing answer thanks for sharing it with us
I agree that such phenomenon can happen in the group chats and it makes it awkward for newcomers to join in the conversation. The solution you suggested is an awesome way to get everyone involved and make them all feel welcome.
@29amy
I've noticed that some newbies are over-apologizing for asking questions or not knowing the Sharing Circle guidelines. I wonder if someone was rude to them previously. I really hope not. I try to explain the guidelines while pointing out that I made the same mistakes when I first joined and that we were all newbies once.
@ASilentObserver
What is one ethical, cultural, or group management issue you recognized in the room? What would you do to handle it?
one issue I have noticed is when people disobey the chatroom guidelines such as bypassing censors, arguing and not being supportive, to handle this I remind them of the guidelines and the rooms purpose - Light-hearted conversations, if the behaviour is repeated I remind them again and if needs be and they are deliberately not complying I shall use the Mod button as needs be. I do this to maintain a positive environment and make it fair for other users in the chatroom as well
All around the chatrooms are an amazing place when rules are followed however, in the event they are not I act accordingly to maintain the positive environment I strive for at 7Cups
I notice people sometimes get frustrated and irritable with the chat rules and I’ve noticed that kindly reminding others of the rules helps a lot. Thanking people for what they did right, asking everyone to remember the rules, thank them again for what they contribute. I notice it diffuses things so much easier that way, and it validates the people for what they are positively contributing.
I agree with your answer and how important the chatroom rules are for the group. It's important to ensure that everyone feel safe and welcome in the groupchat and the chatroom rules exist for that reason. I'm also glad to hear you won't hesitate in enforcing the rules as they are extremely important to maintain positivity in the group chat. Thank you for the wonderful answer.
@KyleBorg it's very important to remind others the purpose of the chatrooms <3 when people bypass censors and don't listen to the guidelines, it can cause so much conflict in the group chats which is what we want to avoid :( everyone should feel safe and comfortable !
@KyleBorg
Kyle, that is great to remind them about guidelines especially in a structured support room. Just saw member came in the middle of a share and asked provocative questions to the sharer, they were not new to the room, they know the guidelines.