What do you do to feel better?
Thank you all for the book and talk recommendations here. We have cataloged them all and I'm working on an outreach plan to reach out to each person that you've recommended.
I'm wriring today with a different, but related, question that I think will also help us better help others that are having a hard time. We've all heard the term "coping skills". These are things that we can do to help ourselves feel better. Sometimes we do these things on purpose because we are struggling; sometimes we do them by accident and don't necessarily realize that they help us change our mindset or help us get unstuck.
When I did therapy (many years ago!), I used to ask people to think about 3-4 things that they do that help them feel better. Then, I'd ask clients to do those very specific things whenever they were having a hard time. This little intervention helps quite a bit because it allows people to tap into skills that they already have and enjoy using.
I'm guessing our community has one of the richest catalogs of coping skills on the planet. I would imagine we have identified hundreds of ways to help ourselves feel better when struggling. If comfortable, please share them here. My goal is to capture all of these and write them up as growth path steps once the playlist is live. If you can, please write them up as you would say them to a good friend.
Here are some quick coping skills from my life:
-talk with my wife or friends
-take a walk
-run
-watch a mindless movie
What works for you?
Thank you!
Update: If any of these look particularly good to you please comment and upvote to let me know which ones work best. Thank you!
i listen to music or go off into a daydream or just cry it out tbh
@GlenM
-Walk the dog
-Go for a hike
-Read a book
-Journal
How about becoming an obsessed fangirl with all fandoms possible. Percy Jackson, hunger games, harry potter, a lot of series, all Rick Riordan.
Also makes you feel accompained
What a great post!! I write many of the activities that make me feel good, here: https://www.7cups.com/forum/MindfulnessCenter_106/MindfulnessCommunityArchivedPosts_1718/Emotionaltank_206965/
music sometimes
having a conversation with someone who is very close to me.
remembering my happy moments
have the thought that everything will be fine
@GlenM
Here's an Alphabet-of-Coping-Skills-Interventions.pdf
from https://rwjms.rutgers.edu/departments_institutes/cf_center/documents/Alphabet-of-Coping-Skills-Interventions.pdf
I've probably done most at one time or another.
Alphabet of Stress Management and Coping Skills
A
Ask for help
Aromatherapy
Art
Attend an event of interest
Athletics
Ask to talk to a friend
Allow time to think
Apologize
Add numbers
Aerobics
Act out favorite actor/actress
Artistically express feelings
Act out feelings
Address the real issue
B
Bounce a stress ball
Breathe slowly
Baking
Basketball
Be attentive
C
Count to ten
Color a picture
Catch a ball
Call crisis line
Call a friend
Cookie decorating
Collect thoughts
Chat with friends
Calming techniques
D
Deep breathing
Drawing emotions/feelings
Dancing
Do push ups
Driving
Drink water
Dress up (play)
Discuss feelings
Demonstrate self-control
E
Eat a snack
Exercise
Escape the situation
F
Find a safe place
Finish house work
Fishing
Free weight
Find a book to read
Filter emotions
Find a puzzle to play
Find a friend
Free write feelings
Following directions
Fly a kite
Focus attention elsewhere
G
Go talk to an adult
Go to happy place
Golfing
Games
Going to a friends
Get help from teacher
Go outside
Go running
Go swimming
Going to the gym
Gather thoughts
Go to a different place
Grow a garden
Get help from others
H
Help someone else with a
problem
Hiking
Have a party
Hug a friend
High jumps
Hang out with friends
Have someone listen to your
problem
I
I statements
Identify triggers
Instagram pictures
Interact with friends
Initiate conversation
Imagine your safe place
Invite someone to play
Ignore people
J
Jogging in place
Jot down good behaviors
Jumping Jacks
Jumping rope
Journaling
K
Kick a soccer ball
Keep a journal
Knitting
Kickboxing
Keep calm by thinking
Kickball
Keep hands to yourself
L
Listen and discuss
Laugh
Long walks
Listen to music
Lay down
Lift weights
Letter writing
Look outside
Learn something new
Lay head down on desk
M
Make a plan
Make silly faces
Make food
Make a craft
Meditate
Make a book
Meet new people
N
Napping
Notes to self
Never give up
Name something positive
O
Offer assistance
Organize item of interest
Obstacle course
Open up
Observe a movie
Observe surroundings
P
Play a game
Paint a picture
Play instrument
Prepare healthy meal
Play at the park
Phone a friend
Play music
Practice sport
Play with PlayDough
Pretend you are in the other
persons shoes
Q
Quiet time
Quilting
Quickly remove stressor
Quiet down
Question feelings
R
Read
Run
Ride a bike
Relax
Rest
Request space
S
Sing
Sleep
Swim
Soak in tub
Soccer
Send a letter
Stretch muscles
Sit in a hammock
Sun bathing
Standing alone
Stop and think about
response
Shoot baskets
Separate self
Speak up
Stop and listen
T
Talk to a friend
Talk to an adult
Take time by yourself
Take a walk
Take a hot shower/bath
Take deep breaths
Take a break
Take a nap
Talk it out
U
Untie your shoes
Use a work out video
Undertake a project
Unite with family
Unwind
Utilize support system
Use a yoyo
Use tools
Utilize resources/coping skills
V
View TV
Visit a friend/family
Volunteer
Visualize calm space
Verbalize emotions
effectively
Visit counselor
Video games
Vent feelings
W
Watch a movie
Write poetry
Walking
Write in journal
Walk outside
Workout
Write feelings/thoughts
Walk away from situation
Write a letter
X
Xylophone playing
Xbox
X-ray your feelings
Y
Yell into a pillow
Yoga
Yodel
Yoyo
Z
Zigzag around room
Zumba
Zone out
@GlenM
This is a much needed post. Thank you for this!
The activities that I like doing when I feel low are:
1) Reading a book
2) Watching movies that I like or any other new movie
3) Cooking a nice meal
4) Going out for a drive or walk, light workouts and meditation
5) Spa activities at home like my own facial, manicure and pedicure
6) Talking to my family and friends
7) Taking a good power nap
I read alot
@GlenM
Listening to Snoh Aalegra or Lord Huron
Drawing, trees and flowers especially
Singing, at the top of my lungs if I'm by myself :)
Playing basketball with my closest friends
@HappyTree906
Loved this post! :)
I go to either....
-target
-Barnes n noble
orrrrr
-a artsy crafty store .
all of these places bring a sense of home and familiarity to me. Make me feel more me when I don't even understand me.
