Friends
@ashyayyy
It must be hard to hide who you really are ash! Showing your true self can include the risk of losing people but those who stay are the real friends who accept you as you are. Is there someone amongst your friend with whom you feel particularly safe with?
There’s one friend, but I don’t feel 100% safe because we haven’t been friends for that long, so I’m still nervous but not as nervous yk?
@ashyayyy
Maybe it's worth a try?
I have same feeling as you I think we can have a chat because I am also a student
I would love to chat!
Then there not really your friends 🙂 just acquaintances. Real friends want you to succeed and encourage you to be you. Through your good and bad days.
Be you, be unique, be weird, be confident in your own shoes, being you is the best super power yet. Not fitting in a crowd is okay because there are several people around you who you might relate to more and that's also okay. If they don't expect you for who you are perhaps find different peers to hang around, people come and go like busses and that's 100% normal🙃 plus you have is always, we are in your corner!
I can relate but I think I have kind of solved this problem. Not saying it will work for you too but just telling that maybe you can consider this as a possibility. Ok, so the thing is I don't like my friends 100% either. There are parts of my friend that I like and don't like. For example, a friend of mine is really good at academics but smokes. So I talk to him when I want to discuss about academic but I want to play sports I ask other friends. Same goes the other way round. You don't want 100% acceptance from others. Everyone is different, it is extremely rare that you could find someone completely relatable. Just think about what common grounds you have with every particular friend and you just need to focus on that thing for them.
If they don't like you, they not your tribe.
Be authentic, so you find your people
@ashyayyyhave you tried being yourself first?
Sometimes, but then I get weird looks..
@ashyayyy
You ought to learn how to love yourself
Be yourself with your friends buddy 😄 😜 ☺️
Heyyyy,
I really do understand that, and that used to be a fear of mine. I know now that, yeah, some people maybe won't accept you for how you are, but most people will, and if they don't, then you shouldn't be friends with them. There are some exceptions to this, though. I have lots of people who are kind of friends and kind of acquaintances whom I am not myself around, and that's okay, but I used to have three good friends who knew me well, and you deserve to find at least one person who knows you well and loves you for it.
Let me know if you want to talk about this further!!
Im slowly managing to become myself with one friend, but it’s tough for me right now, especially because I tend to try and mold myself into what somebody else wants.
I get that, it's hard. When I first start to get to know someone, I become who I think they will like, but I have to remind myself that I don't want friends who don't actually like me. That's good, though. I'm proud of you. Trying to become yourself around someone is hard, especially because if they don't like you, you know it's you. But pretending around all your friends, the people who are supposed to support you and be your safe space, doesn't make any sense; it's too exhausting to do this all the time. Keep working on it!
It is pretty exhausting pretending, but I find it difficult anyway to make friends, and so being myself adds an extra layer of difficulty, yk?
I get that I have always had a hard time making friends because I hate talking to people, and they scare me, so I just don't interact with them. I was in a friend group of 4 girls for 2 years a while ago, and I still see them when they are around, but they all moved for college. If you find your people, then you won't have to pretend anymore and you won't have work to be friends with them. I promise, I was like you, but then I found my people.
@ashyayyy
Be true to yourself and be yourself. If they are your true friends, they will accept you as you are. Otherwise, they are only acquaintances who you have met. I consider a true friend to be someone who supports you through good and bad times. It has taken me many years and going through some very difficult times to discover who my true friends are. I real true friend is loyal, supportive and accepts you for who you are.
I wish you the best.