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Why am I gay?

113 Answers
Last Updated: 12/16/2019 at 5:09pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
Moderated by

Lisa Meighan, BSc Psychology (Honours)


Hello, I am Lisa and I work in a person-centred approach mixed with cognitive behavioural therapy. I believe we all have the potential to be the best we can be.

Top Rated Answers
March 10th, 2015 4:00am
I have a lot of feelings about other girls. Not necessarily sexy feelings, but I feel much more romantically attracted to them.
June 8th, 2015 4:10am
You're gay because that's the way you born. That's who you are, there is no other answer. You're not sick nor a demon is inside you.
June 1st, 2016 9:04pm
There is nothing, listen to me, NOTHING wrong with being gay. Some people like fish, other like meat, and other like both. You are a fish who loves fish as well and there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You are gay because you are human and unique. You are gay because you have feelings and a mind that tells you what matches your personallity better. You are gay because you are yourself. Being gay, straight, trans, whatever, is beautiful. You are beautiful
May 13th, 2016 11:54am
There's no real reason. It sounds like you're feeling guilt about it. Don't. It's perfectly okay to like the same sex.
May 25th, 2016 11:54pm
There isn't really an answer to that. It more got to do with how you were born. Its a prefrence you can't control.
June 15th, 2016 3:30pm
Because it is natural and is simply the way you were born. It is normal and people these days are more accepting than ever to homosexuals, if that is what you are concerned about.
June 23rd, 2016 2:50pm
You are gay because you were born that way. The same reason people are straight. They were born that way.
July 2nd, 2016 9:38pm
From religion to evolution there are many different theories on why someone is gay. They often go with either what a deity has said or nature versus nurture. Whatever you believe, it is not wrong to be gay. There are many people in the world who are gay and they are very important to society. Don't change yourself for anyone.
July 4th, 2016 12:47am
Making this question is the same as asking why do I have brown eyes? well, it's really simple. It's just who you are. maybe it's not what you'd choose. but some choices are not up to us to make. and being gay is one of them. you're just born like that and there's nothing wrong with you. the only wrong thing are people who try to make you feel different and uncomfortable with that. so just feel free to be yourself and don't let anyone push or force you to be someone you're actually not. you love yourself more than anyone so the only one that cares about it is you. say it out loud: "I AM GAY!" and be proud of it...
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
August 12th, 2019 10:53am
Because you were born like this. Orientations are something innate and natural, as science has confirmed. You simply have a different way of loving and finding happiness, but you too have this chance!
April 13th, 2015 11:34am
This is a very difficult question you are asking but I can tell that it bothers you to want some answers. Everyone is different. I am wondering if you could answer the question? Why is it you feel that you are gay?
May 10th, 2015 4:41pm
It's important to remember that no matter what you might hear, or what other people might tell you, a person never chooses to be gay, or straight, or bisexual, or anything else. These are things which are determined before we are born and can't be controlled. Realising you might be LGBTQIA is a scary time, but there are people out there who love you just the way you are and want you to love yourself too. I might not be able to tell you why you're gay, but I can tell you that it's nothing to be ashamed of and that I love you just for being you.
June 22nd, 2015 9:42pm
Your gay because that's just who you are. There's absolutely nothing wrong with someone's sexuality. You were born gay, and that's that.
June 26th, 2015 12:50pm
Some would say you are born gay, some would say it's a environmental effect. Either way, you are fabulous as you are, and there's nothing wrong with being gay. A lot of researchers try to find the answer to this question. "Why some people are gay?", there many assumptions, non has been fully proven yet.
July 11th, 2015 9:32pm
Because it's just what you are. You were born this way baby! :)
November 2nd, 2015 3:53pm
You are gay because you were born this way. We are all born with a sexual orientation. Some are born straight, and some are born gay. Neither of these orientations is any better or any worse than the other.
December 21st, 2015 2:51am
Well, there isn't any real answer, but I'm gay too, and I think it has to do with personalities and who we feel connected with. Being gay isn't a bad thing, it's just who you are. You should embrace it and be proud of it. :) Best of luck!
February 8th, 2016 11:49am
The same reason someone who is straight happens to be straight. You're part of the beautiful diverse tapestry of life. Just Be who you are meant to Be.
February 16th, 2016 2:21am
It's not about what I chose I want to be, it is and always has been about loving the person with all I have, no matter what sex they are.
February 22nd, 2016 7:07am
You were born that way. And it's totally fine. If you are having trouble accepting yourself, you'll get there eventually.
March 18th, 2016 9:20pm
Your gay/lesbian cause your attracted to someone the same gender and you where born that way your not evil your not crazy your just gay/lesbian and that's normal.
March 30th, 2016 6:02am
Why do you like poetry? Why was green your favorite color when you were 4? It's a part of you that makes you unique and is important to you as a person.
March 30th, 2016 5:27pm
I don't think there is a reason your gay, and i don't think there should need to be. Being gay isn't a bad thing, and it should be just as accepted and normal as a person being straight, because Gay is OK. :)
March 31st, 2016 2:43am
As I like men and I not like women and I think it right for me to be gay and but then I cam out gay to my dad he use to hit me and try stop stop me being gay by have sexy with girls
March 31st, 2016 12:18pm
It's a bit of a loaded question, but the simplest way that I can see it is that you're gay because you are. Sexuality isn't something that you can control, it can be fluid, and it's not a choice. Trying to determine why your sexuality is what it is can be a headache, and honestly, does it matter that much? You can choose to accept it or go against it, but what matters in the end is that you are happy
March 31st, 2016 11:30pm
Because you are awesome. I am gay too. we can high five. These things happen. People are born like this.
April 3rd, 2016 5:56am
There is no specific reason why you or anybody is gay. And there doesn't need to be. Point is, you are who you are and you shouldn't change that!
April 3rd, 2016 6:22pm
Why am I straight? (I'm not actually just an example) has anyone who's straight asked themselves this question? I don't think so, because we're lead to believe that straight is the way, it's the God's way, it's the society's ways and it's the best way! That's why when we start to question our sexuality and question whether we might not be straight, whether we might be gay, it conflicts us, scares us and confuses us because we have been told from the start that it's man and woman, that you're simply straight or there's something seriously wrong with you. It's decided for us to be straight from the moment we are born. So when you realize that everything you've been told you are is not you. You ask yourself, what's wrong with me? Nothing is wrong with you. Just because majority of the human race is straight doesn't mean if you're not in the majority that something is wrong with you or you should be ashamed of yourself. Or you should ask yourself but why not? You're just different. And different is good. Straight (not all of them) people have made gay people feel like they are below them or that something is wrong with them long as the start of human race. Like the whites made black people feel they're below them or are born to serve them because of the color of their skin. No! If you're born black, you're born that way, you can't do anything about it. If you're born white you're born that way you can't do anything to change that. You're born gay! It's as simple as that! Now many of us have tried to change but we know...we just know it's really impossible to change who we are and how feel and who we love. It's like changing your whole existence. Which is just not possible! You're gay because you're gay ad that's that!
April 8th, 2016 7:07am
Different people have different reason as to how they pick their sexuality. It could be because of past heart breaks to simply genes.
April 9th, 2016 9:27am
Why am I gay? Because being gay means you have love for someone. Being gay means you know yourself well enough to know who you love. Being gay doesn't mean that you are less than someone else. It doesn't mean that you have made the wrong choice. Being gay just means you have been given a different sexual orientation than some others. Neither gay nor straight is superior. It just comes down to who you love. Love is love. No matter if that love is between two men, a man and a woman, or two women. Why am I gay? Because gay is okay.