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How can I tell someone about self harm without getting in trouble or being judged?

11 Answers
Last Updated: 06/25/2019 at 1:27pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
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Jennifer Patterson, LMFT

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Life can be messy. Sometimes you need a little support to make your way through it. I love to help guide people through their challenges & to find the beauty in our messes.

Top Rated Answers
bestTruth96
January 27th, 2015 7:26pm
Be honest and open. Tell them why you self harm for you it is a release. It is not the best coping mechanism, but this is getting you by. Ask for help if you need it.
Fairy
April 25th, 2015 4:33pm
Chances are, if you tell someone, the last thing they will do is get in trouble or get judged. If you tell someone you trust, the most likely outcome is that they will want to help you, and will guide you slowly out of your self harm episodes. The best way to tell someone is to pick someone you can confide in (whether this be a friend, a teacher, your grandmother, aunt etc), realise they're only going to want to help, and then sit them down and tell them. I may make it sound like I have no idea, and I think it's simple, but I know it isn't- I know it may seem scary- but you want to nip this in the bud sooner rather than later, you know?
RalphBG
January 20th, 2015 4:57pm
I assume you mean, how you can tell someone that you're self harming yourself, without being judged. Honestly, its different for everyone, as everyone has a different family, and they all have different views. I would suggest talking to a counsellor, in person, or online first. But if you don't have access to one, then I would suggest telling them, at first that you want to tell them something personal, and hard. And ask them not to judge or get mad at you, and that you are telling them, so they can help you. This may help them understand, that this is serious, and that you want their help.
Anonymous
August 31st, 2015 3:12am
you can tell someone you know that you can trust about your self harm and odds are they wont judge you for it.
Anonymous
October 26th, 2015 12:59am
Telling someone about self harm is daunting and scary prospect but from experience being able to explain it is a coping mechanism and not attention seeking or a suicidal intention helps a lot. Knowing why you self harm, what it gives you and the triggers this person can help you with helps shiift the focus a little from the actual act to how they can best support you
Anonymous
December 21st, 2015 1:21pm
By seeing someone who specializes in self harm and talking to then openly and honestly with complete anonymity
PhoenixFoxTail
May 9th, 2016 2:23pm
Tell a trusted adult, friend, best friend, teacher, therapist or counsellor is a good start to reaching out.
Millichidulinas
July 12th, 2016 12:05pm
If you really trust that person and he/she trust you back, you can but first you have to be sure. Just talk with him/her for a bit and see what she/he thinks about self harm and depression and stuff.
Anonymous
November 13th, 2017 8:49am
Just be authentic and direct. Trust your own judgment about the person you have chosen to share it with. Most importantly it is to allow the person sometime to process within themselves the experience. It is not often that people decide to share such a personal thing.
overlandprism1769
August 7th, 2018 3:09am
In my experience, it's going to happen anyway. I've been hurting myself for almost 10 years now. I'm not saying it has to happen, but after you release any type of information, it's up to them for what happens afterwards. Make sure open communication is available between you and whomever you are wanting to know.
sunflower10004
June 25th, 2019 1:27pm
Telling someone can be extremely difficult and takes a lot of courage. Talking to a person close to you can help I.e. a teacher, parent or friend. This will help you feel more comfortable talking and takes you to the next step which is getting the help you need and deserve. A doctor or therapist can offer professional and formal advice which can help you to come a reasonable and helpful resolution. Each individual is different and trained medical professionals such as mental health support workers can work around your needs and give you the best possible help suited to you.